BFTD

Our TV's broken, m9. Surprisingly difficult managing to privately give the wean high-fives, while publicly chastising him for his carelessness. Totally worth the effort, though.

The wean broke our TV today. I was surprisingly OK with this until the wife insisted we needed another to watch terrible Netflix TV shows on

Shame you don't know how to pronounce 'overtime', you miserable old c**t. Your lah-tay, sir. Will there be anything else for tonight?

FTFY

She's quite large and disabled, so we might have to give the boat a miss. Just remembered that she's surprisingly dirty though, so maybe it's worth keeping her and putting up with the shite TV shows. Hopefully yours is the same

Swap you. Mine's taken to watching fairy tale Young Adult pish on Netflix. I thought Twilight was bad enough.

That could be a thread all on its own. For me, Peter Jackson's King Kong, as it was shit and we knew we could probably catch the start of another film; same goes for Shrek (although I like the sequels, oddly). There's another one I've forgotten, and I wished I'd left Congo early once it was over. Aside from King Kong, the wife tells me she walked out of the 1998 American Godzilla, and I can't say I blame her. Anyone seen memorable walk-outs from other people? A sizeable percentage of the audience started bitching and walked out of Brotherhood of the Wolf en masse when the subtitles kicked in at the beginning, and practically every late-night horror movie I ever attended in the States would feature an early walk-out from a couple after the baby they brought with them started screaming in terror

The Thing is the best film ever Watched Amazon Women on the Moon again tonight. Holds up surprisingly well, and is remarkably prescient in one or two scenes, like Rosanna Arquette looking up information about Steve Guttenburg before a date, as I understand the young people do these days on their intarwebs. It's not quite The Kentucky Fried Movie, but it's pretty amusing nonetheless

Boo! Never mind; if being ignored bothered me, I'd be more interesting.

Must be some rank rotten children in Dundee if the mothers prefer to use my name over their sons. More than happy to receive Valentines cards from them too, albeit with pictures. I'll forward the elderly ones on to Granny Danger and the Sarge.

I used to get Valentine's Day cards from my gran until I was about seven. I've since met other folk who have similar tales, including folk who got them from their own mothers What kind of confused, Fifesque nonsense is that?

You'll be letting us know where you currently work in time for your last night. No doubt there'll be a lot of 'bad pints' that your pals at P&B would be happy to save you the effort of pouring away

Yowzers. I'd have bought the Special Edition too if I'd known that was one of the bonus features.

Give the auld yin a break, folks. We'll all find comprehension hard when we get to that age.

This is a point that needs airing at the next meeting. Please, let us know how it goes, Monster.

Considering how most men have shagged a terrifying lunatic, I'm surprised none of the car manufacturers have gone down that route. "The new Peugeot BatshitCrazy: for the drive of your life"

Be a gentleman and offer to make the tea yourself. That's half the problem solved. Be a complete b*****d and slip some arsenic into hers. No point leaving a job half done.

Does that include expenses? It'll sound much less attractive if you have to buy the lingerie out of your own pocket.

Knowing P&B, it'd more likely be, "I drank the yellow puddle".

Those Cazador fucks from New Vegas were even worse. My first attempt at the game finished about half an hour in, as I discovered a trench full of them near the starting town. Pegged it back to the village to try and escape, only for them to follow me and turn the place into a bloodbath.

Recently found out that a previous job may have ruled me out for another that I was interested in. Bit of a scunner, and I'd elaborate, but I get the feeling it might be more fun to leave it vague Also, someone's currently ralphing outside our house. Get it fucking cleaned before the morning, whichever one of you middens it was

I did. Think someone said that your clothing bonuses don't count once you put power armour on, though. Just don't go in a Hazmat Suit alone. Might be a little tricky.

Oh, bloodbugs? What a pain in the arse they are. Practically VATS or use up a million bullets trying to hit them. The Glowing Sea in general is purely for double-hard, heavy metal Bruce Lee b*****ds who drink radiation and pish rainbows. Hazmat suits and power armour required.

WTF is the point of the Boston Airport settlement? You can hardly build a single shack before hitting the maximum settlement size, and there's no way of growing crops. Well worthwhile Flying shit? You sure you're not playing Skyrim?

Jesus. Praise be that burning the groom alive has been wiped out since that Summersisle fiasco. Anyway, Jambono is correct - Vegas is the answer. There are Elvii everywhere who'll marry you at the drop of a hat, and your whole honeymoon will be your stag/hen party, only without the bizarre unpleasant rituals. Unless you count the STD tests when you get home.