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I inherited my granddads clock when he pegged it a few years ago and it was in dire need of repair and cleaning. It's about 100 years old as it was his fathers before him. Anyway I put it into a specialist clock repairman and he has lost the fucking thing.

He has offered me a minor compensation figure but feel that's not the point. I reckon the c***s claimed it.

 

I lost my Dads alarm clock when I was kid so it is possible.....but unless the old c**t has loaned it to his 12yo grandson to take camping he's fucking at it!

 

 

It wasn't a grandfather clock it was a mantelpiece clock, it was my grandads.

When I brought it in he said it had been made in Germany which made me suspicious of my great grandads intentions during WW1 as I reckon he claimed it from some house he was shooting Germans in.

 

Scorched earth policy mate......which might be an idea for the repairmans premises?

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I know my spelling is atrocious so can we both just blame the spellchecker for not realising I wanted to say lose and not loose.

Thank you for your cooperation and understanding in this matter and I hope we can move forward from this point in our relationship to a brighter better future.

Ok, ok. What have I got to loose anyway??

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To make a morning smoothie for me and Mrs throbber I use 200 ml almond milk, half a mango, a handful of frozen raspberries a handful of frozen blueberries and 4 desert spoons of yoghurt. Sometimes I add a couple table spoons of almond butter for a nice bit of flavour but that is expensive.

 

I believe in taking care of myself and a balanced diet and rigorous exercise routine. In the morning if my face is a little puffy I'll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now. After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser, then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

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It's an ever so slight step up from Farmfoods in the 'tinker' stakes but Iceland's own brand Hot & Spicy chicken strips are fucking excellent. I hold no shame.

They're wrapped in mission deli garlic and rosemary tortilla's alongside grated mature cheddar and encona chilli sauce, for anyone remotely interested.

Edited by Deeboy
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A bit over the top Mark but on glad you take pride in your body and appearance! I used to be a bit like that a few years ago mind you.

You know it was an American Psycho Pie & Bovril the Movie quote, right?

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That film has spoiled skipping for me. When I skip in the gym I have to concentrate on not pulling Bateman faces.

I analyse at the design of business cards whenever somebody gives me white, seeing if I can differentiate whatever 'off-white' colouring is from bone. Sadly true. :(

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