philpy Posted September 20, 2016 Share Posted September 20, 2016 Cheers folks. When I'm at work I'm at my best, it's when I get in the door I start to feel shite, I don't know how to combat it. I've also got a lot I need to get off my chest regarding past issues on here, but I'd get shot down in flames so I'll not bother with that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted September 20, 2016 Author Share Posted September 20, 2016 I'm the opposite, mate - when I'm at work, I'm at my worst - it's when I get home that I start to feel normal - well, I say normal... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted September 20, 2016 Share Posted September 20, 2016 Cheers folks. When I'm at work I'm at my best, it's when I get in the door I start to feel shite, I don't know how to combat it. I've also got a lot I need to get off my chest regarding past issues on here, but I'd get shot down in flames so I'll not bother with that. When I was going through the first stages of depression, I was the same as I felt I was doing something useful for a change. It was when I got home that I just felt like a useless burden and this thought just continually grew exponentially when I was made redundant. Should have seeked medical help there and then rather than continue down a seemingly dead end road for months. In a warped mindset I didn't even want to burden the doctor, something which seems ridiculous now but something I genuinely felt the time. To be brutally honest, I contemplated suicide daily for a few months on end and didn't want to see the doctor in case my other half didn't get an insurance payout for whatever reason in the small print. Thought I could somehow fall of a cliff and be of use to somebody just for once. Depression truly f***s with your mind. PS. Pretty sure all P&Bers have demons which the rest of us would have a field day with. Except me of course. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theo Snelders Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 8 hours ago, philpy said: Cheers folks. When I'm at work I'm at my best, it's when I get in the door I start to feel shite, I don't know how to combat it. I've also got a lot I need to get off my chest regarding past issues on here, but I'd get shot down in flames so I'll not bother with that. Is there someone who could come round the odd evening to spend time with your wife and give you some respite? Are there any support groups in your area so you can get tips from folk experiencing similar? 7 hours ago, Hedgecutter said: When I was going through the first stages of depression, I was the same as I felt I was doing something useful for a change. It was when I got home that I just felt like a useless burden and this thought just continually grew exponentially when I was made redundant. Should have seeked medical help there and then rather than continue down a seemingly dead end road for months. In a warped mindset I didn't even want to burden the doctor, something which seems ridiculous now but something I genuinely felt the time. To be brutally honest, I contemplated suicide daily for a few months on end and didn't want to see the doctor in case my other half didn't get an insurance payout for whatever reason in the small print. Thought I could somehow fall of a cliff and be of use to somebody just for once. Depression truly f***s with your mind. PS. Pretty sure all P&Bers have demons which the rest of us would have a field day with. Except me of course. That sounds really awful-glad you are in a better place now. I can echo and relate to what you say. Depression can rob you of everything-confidence, self esteem, self worth. Even your life. There is always help out there and though it might not feel like it at the time, things can, and do, get better! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthernJambo Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 Is it bad to feel depressed about someone else being depressed? Selfish maybe?? My wife is going through a bad spell at the moment and if I'm being honest, I'm struggling to cope but i don't want her worrying about me, she's got enough going on just now. Think you're just showing empathy, Philpy. Your Mrs might be thinking the same about her depression, doesn't want to bother you with it etc., and it's compounding things. As well as looking at all the above advice which could help, I'd really urge you to talk to your Mrs. Won't be an easy topic to breach but just have a chat about it, work through it together and be there for each other. Doesn't always need to be you for her or her for you, you can be both be there for each other. Cliched and sounds corny, I know, but it's important. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 14 hours ago, philpy said: Cheers folks. When I'm at work I'm at my best, it's when I get in the door I start to feel shite, I don't know how to combat it. I've also got a lot I need to get off my chest regarding past issues on here, but I'd get shot down in flames so I'll not bother with that. Get it off your chest, it'll help. If anyone slags you for it in this thread their opinion isn't worth listening too. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philpy Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 Its regarding the autism thing ruggy. It was a cry for help. My dad was self employed, and had a small genuine mishap where he hadnt put a velux window through the books, and got hammered financially by the taxman. He tried to kill himself two weeks later, our next door neighbour managed to stop him, but hes never been 100% since. Hes retired now but he can still be very edgy at times. The whole thing just sent me over the edge. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jessmagic Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 Folks don't really have any good advice. But wife suffers from depression and I have to admit I never really believed in it until someone I knew was diagnosed with it. However now I fully understand that it is a serious illness and you can't just say "get on with things" to someone who suffers from it. Good luck to anyone with what they are trying and it's always good to talk. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 I genuinely don't know what i'm doing anymore, or if i'm actually feeling depressed, been kind of in a rut since the start of July. I feel out of place at work, Worthless because i'm still staying with my parents and have barely any savings, and all my friends are moving in with partners, getting engaged, having kids and moving forward with careers. I'm stuck in an office, the job is repetitive but well paid for what it is but i have a trade behind me, kinda worthless when the building industry is as fucked as it is and everyone is moving around with no guarantee of work. I tried to go back to college and actually get qualifications and improve my life, but i could only do it on a full-time basis, can't get any course i want to do on a part time basis and i'm not in a position to give up hours at work, or go part-time. The feelings probably haven't been helped with my granny dying, usually she was my go to for advice or just a chat if i was feeling down, I've spoken to my girlfriend about this and she knows the feelings, but i don't want to be a burden on her with these feelings, or on my family, i often fear they are more than likely just going to tell me to get used to it and move on as usual. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthernJambo Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 Philpy, sorry to hear about the plight with the old man. Always a head f**k when your parents seem vulnerable. You spend any extended periods of time with him? It helped settle my reservations about my old man when I was worried about him. Mizfit, I know exactly how you feel. I've been going through the same. My jobs really dragging, been there 2 year and so far all I've to show is a pay cut. Boss has no interest in me progressing because I'm doing a good job. I'm single, live on my tod, away from my family so seeing my friends have weans and that as well. Not sure I have any advice as such but I just tell myself "it ain't great, but it could be worse" and just keep on keeping on. Know you aren't alone at least [emoji106] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 I genuinely don't know what i'm doing anymore, or if i'm actually feeling depressed, been kind of in a rut since the start of July. I feel out of place at work, Worthless because i'm still staying with my parents and have barely any savings, and all my friends are moving in with partners, getting engaged, having kids and moving forward with careers. I'm stuck in an office, the job is repetitive but well paid for what it is but i have a trade behind me, kinda worthless when the building industry is as fucked as it is and everyone is moving around with no guarantee of work. I tried to go back to college and actually get qualifications and improve my life, but i could only do it on a full-time basis, can't get any course i want to do on a part time basis and i'm not in a position to give up hours at work, or go part-time. The feelings probably haven't been helped with my granny dying, usually she was my go to for advice or just a chat if i was feeling down, I've spoken to my girlfriend about this and she knows the feelings, but i don't want to be a burden on her with these feelings, or on my family, i often fear they are more than likely just going to tell me to get used to it and move on as usual. I went part time 3 years ago and did 2 years at college, when I added my student loan to my part time wage I was earning comfortable more than I was when was full time. If you are entitled to student funding then go for it. I don't know what it's like with you guys, but it's pish with us at the moment. Too much work/not enough staff. Unrelated, but I'm fairly sure I spoke to you on the phone on Thursday. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 I've been told the same by others in work, but I have the fear it won't work out the same to be honest. Yeah I thought it was you, apologies, was half asleep [emoji23] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 I've been told the same by others in work, but I have the fear it won't work out the same to be honest. Yeah I thought it was you, apologies, was half asleep [emoji23] If you can still work 20 hours you'll definitely be at least as well off. I was much the same [emoji23] so much so that it would have been Monday, not Thursday. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoBNob Posted September 21, 2016 Share Posted September 21, 2016 While you may not think you have many friends Da, the two guys I was speaking to in Malta were very keen and had a few good stories, you're evidently alright! I like the quote about the guy on a boat. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 9 hours ago, Grant228 said: While you may not think you have many friends Da, the two guys I was speaking to in Malta were very keen and had a few good stories, you're evidently alright! I like the quote about the guy on a boat. Aye they're top lads. I'd totally forgotten that I briefly spoke to you on the phone. A pleasure. Guy on a boat? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoBNob Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 Aye they're top lads. I'd totally forgotten that I briefly spoke to you on the phone. A pleasure. Guy on a boat? The said much the same about you. They also explained who you were and I think I figured it out from Pars games in years gone by and you always came across as a top boy. Completely true. A friend sent me a message a few weeks ago when I was feeling down, and as corny as the quote goes (by an American I believe), it came from a guy who was stranded at sea for 76 days in nothing but a rubber dingy. "I'm doing the best that I can."That's really all any of us can do. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy85 Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 Not wishing to turn this into an episode of brown nosing DA Baracus but the c**t is genuinely one of the funniest, quick witted guys you're ever likely to meet. The fact the he hates everything and everyone is an added bonus. Top bloke. With all that said, he's still a Tory c**t. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 (edited) I quite like you too DA, even though you have an amputee pram fetish. Edited September 22, 2016 by Rugster confused amputee for midget 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Skidmarks Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 I especially liked his story of hatred towards the guy who sat in his regular seat at lunchtime. A rage we could all relate to. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweaty Morph Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 I especially liked his story of hatred towards the guy who sat in his regular seat at lunchtime. A rage we could all relate to. I love DA's general hatred towards everything and anything but the guy sitting in 'his' seat was a particular highlight for me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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