Depression

[Ad Lib]

Usually you're put on a lower/standard dosage before getting it ramped up letting it settle and getting acclimated with it. With that said, medication and dosage should be examined on an individual case-by-case basis, so your best bet is to go back to your doctor. Might not even be the dose, as it could be the drug. You're based in Glasgow aren't you? Have you ever been referred to one of the psychiatrist over at the Arran Centre in Bridgeton?

Edit: my spelling is all over the shot..

Yeah I'm in Glasgow. I've not been referred to anyone, just prescribed by my GP.

[alr]

I've had a really rough few days. I started on sertraline on Thursday and had a really horrible panic attack in front of a lot of people on Friday evening. I've been restless almost non-stop for days and today has been a total write-off, not leaving the flat.

I think this might be partly attributable to the side effects of the medication, or possibly a dosage issue. Anyone got any experience of this? Should I be going back to my doctor urgently or wait until I've been through this fortnight of the stuff?

I've been a regular lurker on P&B for a few years now without ever posting anything but only just found this thread a week or so ago. I've got my own reasons for battling a bit of depression for a couple of years but only addressed it about 6 weeks ago when I went to see my GP. I was prescribe 50mg of sertraline and have been taking them since.

The way my doctor described them to me was that you need to give them a good two weeks to really get into your blood stream and go to work on your brain. I personally felt a bit better after only a couple of days but I think that was mainly down to my own relief that I was finally doing something about it as well as an affect similar to that of a placebo. ie 'I'm taking something now, I'll be okay'.

What the doctor also explained to me was that he now asks patients how long they would like to be on anti-depresseants for. I gave the answer that he always receives - 'as little time as possible/not long'. He found this interesting as he says that for any other disease or virus you wouldn't want to finish medication too early but the stigma attached to depression makes us want off of anti-depressants as quickly as possible.

I've felt much better since starting the medication and now have a bit of a carefree outlook on everyday life that has given me the sort of acceptance and simplicity that just takes a huge weight off. I'm expecting to be on sertraline for another 8 weeks or so and will trust in the process.

It would be worth telling your GP about the panic attack as there is obviously no one fix for all.

As an aside, does anyone else suffer from side effects from sertraline? I sometimes get an all over itch for a good 5 minutes, particularly when exercising. I also have the 'climax difficulty' which my mrs hasn't yet complained about..

[RH33]

Ad Lib give your GP a phone.

Yeah inability to climax and refused libedo are common side effects of anti depressants.

[NotThePars]

I did my teacher training at Moray House. I absolutely loved it.

When did you go? I've heard the course has been quite revamped but it sounds really impressive and right up my alley. Still haven't heard anything though.

[NotThePars]

I've had a really rough few days. I started on sertraline on Thursday and had a really horrible panic attack in front of a lot of people on Friday evening. I've been restless almost non-stop for days and today has been a total write-off, not leaving the flat.

I think this might be partly attributable to the side effects of the medication, or possibly a dosage issue. Anyone got any experience of this? Should I be going back to my doctor urgently or wait until I've been through this fortnight of the stuff?

The beginning of sertraline is TOUGH. I'm into the pill scene and so on and the closest I could describe the first couple of weeks was constantly feeling like I was rushing on ecstasy. Teeth constantly chattering, nausea all the time and really on edge constantly. I cut the dosage down to 50mg again and it settled eventually and I did start to feel more at ease. My friend started on 50 and was floored and vomiting constantly for days and she was too anxious to see anyone for over a week. I'm not sure what I would recommend. We both had a horrid time starting off but eventually settled in bit I think if you feel you have to speak to a doctor then go ahead.

[Sergeant Wilson]

I'm into the pill scene .

I'm not a Doctor, but...

[The Moonster]

The beginning of sertraline is TOUGH. I'm into the pill scene and so on and the closest I could describe the first couple of weeks was constantly feeling like I was rushing on ecstasy. Teeth constantly chattering, nausea all the time and really on edge constantly. I cut the dosage down to 50mg again and it settled eventually and I did start to feel more at ease. My friend started on 50 and was floored and vomiting constantly for days and she was too anxious to see anyone for over a week. I'm not sure what I would recommend. We both had a horrid time starting off but eventually settled in bit I think if you feel you have to speak to a doctor then go ahead.

When I started on Citalopram the first thing I said to my mate was that I felt like I was on ecstacy but in a bad way, if that makes sense. Sweating, nausea, jaw muscles tense and I felt on edge all the time too but there was no "happy" feeling or buzz like you would get with ecstacy. My doctor took my dosage down to 10mg for the next few weeks and I was okay with that, still had some of the feelings above but nowhere near bad enough to stop me functioning.

I'm going to start coming off Citalopram in the next few months. I've had a good couple of months of feeling relatively normal (minus a couple of days over the holidays) so my doctor wants me to try taking it every second day instead of every day and see how I go.

[???]

Been a regular lurker on here and find it comforting to know I am not the only one who feels the way most of us do. I have recently experienced the death of a really close family member and struggle to stop thinking about them everyday, sometimes see myself crying whilst at work. Most of my emotions remain bottled up until I am drunk and on my own. Normally at the end of my night out where I'll go home and cry. Always suffered a battle with depression for aslong as I can remember, no matter what I do I always end up feeling helpless. Doesn't help that I despise work and dread everyday when I wake up.

Recently got my life plan in check and beginning to feel really optimistic about the future for the first time in a long time. Hopefully all goes to plan with that.

This thread is probably my favourite on P&B. Felt I'd post a contribution to it as I have read everyone else's so fair is fair.

[BFTD]

Hi folks - hope you're all doing OK.

My son was diagnosed with autism earlier this week, and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't be having these problems if I'd done a better job when he was younger. His mum spent six months in intensive care when he was in nursery, and that's when his symptoms started to manifest.

Not handling it well.

[Lisa Cuddy]

It's not unusual that signs appeared when he was at nursery. Given the social developmental disability of Autism, it's when kids are taking part in social activity that you'd spot these things. Don't be hard on yourself: it's not you, it's not your wife, it is what it is. You will learn much the same as parents of neurotypical children learn how to deal with their child, their likes, dislikes, quirks and all manner of ways to cope with the challenges. You're going to be fine. I know thus because, 18 months on from my son's diagnosis, I'm fine! It's a learning curve but you know your son best and you will manage. A diagnosis hasn't changed him.

[Ad Lib]

Been on sertraline for about a week now. I've been taking it before going to bed. Still finding mornings and afternoons are a bit of a write-off with restlessness and anxiety but it seems to settle down in the evenings a bit. Hopefully I can get on top of this fairly soon as otherwise I'm going to fall behind with work and the like because I just can't get anything done.

[NotThePars]

Been on sertraline for about a week now. I've been taking it before going to bed. Still finding mornings and afternoons are a bit of a write-off with restlessness and anxiety but it seems to settle down in the evenings a bit. Hopefully I can get on top of this fairly soon as otherwise I'm going to fall behind with work and the like because I just can't get anything done.

That's my experience. Normally wake up on days where I'm meeting friends really anxious but it does pass eventually.

[Fireplace]

I've just finished a course of therapy with a CPN and I think it's done me a lot of good. I'm a lot more open about things. My personal life (alluded to in previous posts) has improved a lot as well, I'm not doing reckless things anymore and am hopefully a better person to be with.

I do get downhearted a bit but what the CPN has taught me is that I need to try and get perspective and rather than allowing thoughts to run into considering hurting myself if things don't go as I'd like I can try and rationalise things.

[Richey Edwards]

I've been suffering from depression again recently. I am 24 years old and feel alone most of the time even when I'm with other people.

I have a low paid job but not a career or any savings to speak of, and I still live with my parents. Everyone I know my own age goes travelling abroad and stuff and I've done none of these.

I have a girlfriend but tbh I'm terrible company and I make her feel miserable. She's a lovely girl but she would be better off without me.

I have considered taking my own life and have attempted to do so in the past but last time I tried I realised how many people I'd hurt if I did. Fortunately my desire to not inflict pain on them is currently stronger than my desire to end everything.

I have a university interview soon and should be looking forward to this but I'm not really sure what I want from life. I've tried doing the things I thought I wanted to do but they have all turned out to not be for me.

I also suffer from anxiety and hate social occasions and busy places like trains, going shopping etc. I feel self conscious and awkward.

I have been on escitalopram and received CBT in the past and these helped to an extent but it was only temporary.

[Theo Snelders]

I've been suffering from depression again recently. I am 24 years old and feel alone most of the time even when I'm with other people.

I have a low paid job but not a career or any savings to speak of, and I still live with my parents. Everyone I know my own age goes travelling abroad and stuff and I've done none of these.

I have a girlfriend but tbh I'm terrible company and I make her feel miserable. She's a lovely girl but she would be better off without me.

I have considered taking my own life and have attempted to do so in the past but last time I tried I realised how many people I'd hurt if I did. Fortunately my desire to not inflict pain on them is currently stronger than my desire to end everything.

I have a university interview soon and should be looking forward to this but I'm not really sure what I want from life. I've tried doing the things I thought I wanted to do but they have all turned out to not be for me.

I also suffer from anxiety and hate social occasions and busy places like trains, going shopping etc. I feel self conscious and awkward.

I have been on escitalopram and received CBT in the past and these helped to an extent but it was only temporary.

Richey, please go back to your GP.

More CBT (and/or medication) will boost your resilliance.

You have succeeded once, you can do it again.

[Richey Edwards]

I'm planning on going back to the GP once my current run of nightshifts ends at the end of the month and I have a few days off to return to normality.

I have quite a stressful and demanding job in healthcare and working keeps me busy and I basically just sleep when I'm off. I've often thought that I would be a lot better if I just chucked it and never had to worry about it again but it's the only profession I have any real experience in.

I don't really have a social life because I only have one real friend. I get on well with my colleagues and socialise with them at work but I'm not really close to anyone.

I've had a few tearful moments in recent weeks because I felt particularly awful but they passed and I was able to continue with my day.

I know depression is temporary but sometimes it seems eternal.

[DA Baracus]

I'm planning on going back to the GP once my current run of nightshifts ends at the end of the month and I have a few days off to return to normality.

I have quite a stressful and demanding job in healthcare and working keeps me busy and I basically just sleep when I'm off. I've often thought that I would be a lot better if I just chucked it and never had to worry about it again but it's the only profession I have any real experience in.

I don't really have a social life because I only have one real friend. I get on well with my colleagues and socialise with them at work but I'm not really close to anyone.

I've had a few tearful moments in recent weeks because I felt particularly awful but they passed and I was able to continue with my day.

I know depression is temporary but sometimes it seems eternal.

Spot on. It's no real help knowing that it will pass at some point either. The only thing I can advise is to treat it and the causes of it immediately, or else you'll wake up in 10 years and realise you have lost a decade of your life (which isn't so good). Don't put it off, even just for a day. That quickly turns in to week, which is then 2 weeks, then a month, then 2 months, then a year, then 2 years, then you wake up 10 years later in a flat in Dundee with no heating in a shite job and no friends. If you have to leave your job, you might think it's the best thing you've done. If not, you can always go back in to the industry. You'd be amazed at the number of those working in healthcare who have had similar issues (I know this because it's technically part of my job to know such things). You're still young and can still train in another area if you have to. I would say it's best to not think in such linear terms. Plus there is no point in making future plans if you have no idea what you will be like. You need to work on yourself and getting yourself right first before you can think that much about longer term plans.

At the risk of being premature (ha! ask yer maw), my depression seems to have pretty much just gone for the most part (although I'm still not 100%). I started feeling better around December, and I have pretty much no idea why. I have been sleeping so much better, have more energy and have a bit of optimism. Of course I've still got to deal with the fallout from being so fucked up for so long (weight issues, debt, loneliness, shite job, why the f**k am I living in Dundee, reconnecting with friends, family issues), but I feel more able to do so now. I have had a couple of days where I felt a bit down, but it was markedly different to before and I was able to cope with it much easier and be rational about it, instead of the usual downward spiral where bad thoughts just compounded and paranoia and hysteria set in. Talking of the Downward Spiral, never ever listen to that song at full blast whilst utterly shitfaced holding a knife.

Oh and meant to add, you can PM me any time if you want Richey.

Edited February 12, 2015 by DA Baracus

[Hedgecutter]

This isn't about depression as such but I can't think of anywhere else to ask it other than quick questions, which it's probably not. Does anybody have any 'opening up about your feelings' problems similar to the following?:

I've got to the stage where if I want to open up about buried troubles but I'm rather feart of the consequences which could turn into a downwards spiral and just make things even worse, then I can't do it. It's not so much a case of not 'manning up' but where I want to say it, nothing comes out. After a while of building up to get a sentence out, I can only get a couple of words out before stopping and often my mind will just go blank. Nothing thinking "oh this is a terrible thing", just absolutely nothing. If not that, it's as if there's something in my head which is jumping in and stopping me say it, saying "bad, bad idea - don't go there, just don't", even to my other half.

Really strangely, if it's a bit of involuntary bed-talk then I can rarely just get it out, but it rather bizarrely has to be a whisper. For some reason I can't bring myself to say it in a normal voice, as if the lower part of my throat / voice box has been completely shut down. Although I can write this just now, there's probably no way I could actually talk about it. It brings on a very distinctive bad gut feeling and I had the worst case I've ever had the other night. Even having to ask somebody at work for a word in private about something relatively trivial which I don't want others to hear, I can't bring myself to even get up and ask.

It's rather embarrassing (which doesn't help as I can just feel useless) and I feel that even if I went to my GP / other professional then I wouldn't be able to say what the issue is, no matter how much they say it's confidential. In fact, i struggle to explain it to myself. Basically, has anyone here experienced the same? I'm fully expecting the answer to be 'No' tbh but it's worth a punt. I won't lie though, it's not been easy pushing this 'Post' button to officially admit / publish this.

Eta: Since posting, I've got a horrendous 'WTF have I done?' gut / chest feeling with an overwhelming desire to delete all this while I can. It's similar to the 'post-night out fear' (which I only recently experienced for the first time), but not quite the same, in fact worse. Really can't explain it any more but thanks for putting up with the long winded attempt if you've got this far.

Edited February 16, 2015 by Hedgecutter

[Lisa Cuddy]

This isn't about depression as such but I can't think of anywhere else to ask it other than quick questions, which it's probably not. Does anybody have any 'opening up about your feelings' problems similar to the following?:

I've got to the stage where if I want to open up about buried troubles but I'm rather feart of the consequences which could turn into a downwards spiral and just make things even worse, then I can't do it. It's not so much a case of not 'manning up' but where I want to say it, nothing comes out. After a while of building up to get a sentence out, I can only get a couple of words out before stopping and often my mind will just go blank. Nothing thinking "oh this is a terrible thing", just absolutely nothing. If not that, it's as if there's something in my head which is jumping in and stopping me say it, saying "bad, bad idea - don't go there, just don't", even to my other half.

Really strangely, if it's a bit of involuntary bed-talk then I can rarely just get it out, but it rather bizarrely has to be a whisper. For some reason I can't bring myself to say it in a normal voice, as if the lower part of my throat / voice box has been completely shut down. Although I can write this just now, there's probably no way I could actually talk about it. It brings on a very distinctive bad gut feeling and I had the worst case I've ever had the other night. Even having to ask somebody at work for a word in private about something relatively trivial which I don't want others to hear, I can't bring myself to even get up and ask.

It's rather embarrassing (which doesn't help as I can just feel useless) and I feel that even if I went to my GP / other professional then I wouldn't be able to say what the issue is, no matter how much they say it's confidential. In fact, i struggle to explain it to myself. Basically, has anyone here experienced the same? I'm fully expecting the answer to be 'No' tbh but it's worth a punt. I won't lie though, it's not been easy pushing this 'Post' button to officially admit / publish this.

Eta: Since posting, I've got a horrendous 'WTF have I done?' gut / chest feeling with an overwhelming desire to delete all this while I can. It's similar to the 'post-night out fear' (which I only recently experienced for the first time), but not quite the same, in fact worse. Really can't explain it any more.

Quoted you, no deleting it now.

I don't think you're alone in this. It's very difficult to voice big concerns because it means that they now suddenly exist to other people and the chain reaction of events after is hard to predict - and you can't put the genie back in the bottle. You haven't actually posted anything revealing here so there is no need for the "what have I done" feeling. You've not hurt anyone with it, you've not triggered anything. Don't let that concern you.

[Hedgecutter]

It's very difficult to voice big concerns because it means that they now suddenly exist to other people and the chain reaction of events after is hard to predict - and you can't put the genie back in the bottle.

A fine way of putting it, which is very applicable to my case. Thanks.