Jacksgranda Posted May 30, 2020 Share Posted May 30, 2020 1 hour ago, Raidernation said: May, June and July are just fantastic months for me. Mother died May 1st Mrs. RN#2 died May 14th Mrs. RN#3 died June 13th and was interred June 18th which is also Mrs. RN#2’s birthday! Father’s birthday was June 25th Brother’s birthday was July 6th Mother’s birthday was July 15th Plan is to cope sober, so far so good. Should point out that the deaths were different years. Shouldn't have, but I did Rn, this too shall pass, one day at a time. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thereisalight.. Posted June 5, 2020 Share Posted June 5, 2020 I’d been having a better few days but today was a step backwards. I had a really vivid and horrible dream about my recent ex and it sort of set the tone for the day. Fridays (and Saturdays) are bad days for me as they remind me of being at the hospital with my Dad for his last few hours. I got my old bike sorted at the beginning of the week and was enjoying getting out on that but it was too windy today for cycling/walking/hiking so I’m sure that’s not helping my low mood today. Still missing my work and the routine of that. Hope everyone else is doing alright 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 5, 2020 Share Posted June 5, 2020 On 30/05/2020 at 05:15, Raidernation said: May, June and July are just fantastic months for me. Mother died May 1st Mrs. RN#2 died May 14th Mrs. RN#3 died June 13th and was interred June 18th which is also Mrs. RN#2’s birthday! Father’s birthday was June 25th Brother’s birthday was July 6th Mother’s birthday was July 15th Plan is to cope sober, so far so good. Should point out that the deaths were different years. Thankfully the only birthdays I remember are for the purposes of identity theft. Happy looting, stay strong. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harkinsbaldpatch Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 Hope everyone is coping as well as they can. I have been fairly positive through this pandemic, more so to keep my wife positive as well, as she is struggling with being on furlough and not having any company while I'm at work. I must admit though I'm starting to go abit downhill the last few days, had a panic attack yesterday and felt so sad, this isnt something new as I've had it for years but I've been okay up until this point and I'm abit worried it's all catching up with me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 Hope everyone is coping as well as they can. I have been fairly positive through this pandemic, more so to keep my wife positive as well, as she is struggling with being on furlough and not having any company while I'm at work. I must admit though I'm starting to go abit downhill the last few days, had a panic attack yesterday and felt so sad, this isnt something new as I've had it for years but I've been okay up until this point and I'm abit worried it's all catching up with me. It’s difficult mate but you’ve recognised it first and foremost. Even without the world turning to shit we all had down days so there’s certainly no shame in it. Try and make sure you’re doing what’s worked for you previously, exercise has been helping me clear my head when need be. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 5 hours ago, harkinsbaldpatch said: Hope everyone is coping as well as they can. I have been fairly positive through this pandemic, more so to keep my wife positive as well, as she is struggling with being on furlough and not having any company while I'm at work. I must admit though I'm starting to go abit downhill the last few days, had a panic attack yesterday and felt so sad, this isnt something new as I've had it for years but I've been okay up until this point and I'm abit worried it's all catching up with me. The good thing here is you can recognise the signs and when you need to take action. Having a bit of concern that it's going to catch up to you can be a positive, it's the first step to getting control back over it. I have the fear of death of it hitting me badly again so when I start to go down a bad route I up the exercise, bin the booze or anything else and generally just get myself going again. As NJ2 says, you'll have things that you know help. Make time for them, take it slowly and just look after yourself. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 1 hour ago, Dons_1988 said: The good thing here is you can recognise the signs and when you need to take action. Having a bit of concern that it's going to catch up to you can be a positive, it's the first step to getting control back over it. I have the fear of death of it hitting me badly again so when I start to go down a bad route I up the exercise, bin the booze or anything else and generally just get myself going again. As NJ2 says, you'll have things that you know help. Make time for them, take it slowly and just look after yourself. This. And you posted on here. Two positives, imo 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 I feel like telling work to GTF.Customer I had on Saturday, did test drive and all the paperwork etc. didn’t buy because his wife doesn’t to sit about for a couple of hours.Found out today he’s been “assigned” to another salesman today for no apparent reason.Makes me feel angry, like shit, worthless, unwanted etc.Thankfully I have a meeting with my AA sponsor tonight 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 I feel like telling work to GTF.Customer I had on Saturday, did test drive and all the paperwork etc. didn’t buy because his wife doesn’t to sit about for a couple of hours.Found out today he’s been “assigned” to another salesman today for no apparent reason.Makes me feel angry, like shit, worthless, unwanted etc.Thankfully I have a meeting with my AA sponsor tonight Wanks mate. Try not to let them get to you, you’ve dealt with plenty...petty fucks like that aren’t worth the energy spent getting annoyed about. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 25 minutes ago, Raidernation said: I feel like telling work to GTF. Customer I had on Saturday, did test drive and all the paperwork etc. didn’t buy because his wife doesn’t to sit about for a couple of hours. Found out today he’s been “assigned” to another salesman today for no apparent reason. Makes me feel angry, like shit, worthless, unwanted etc. Thankfully I have a meeting with my AA sponsor tonight Am I right in thinking that until recently you were a teacher and you've now reinvented yourself as a car salesman on the outskirts of Chicago? Struggling with alcohol but being strong and trying to hold it together? This is Sundance Film Festival gold bitch, make it work, make it happen. Your life I mean, the Hollywood thing would be pushing it.. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harkinsbaldpatch Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 Thanks for the replys much appreciated. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 (edited) 8 hours ago, Raidernation said: I feel like telling work to GTF. Customer I had on Saturday, did test drive and all the paperwork etc. didn’t buy because his wife doesn’t to sit about for a couple of hours. Found out today he’s been “assigned” to another salesman today for no apparent reason. Makes me feel angry, like shit, worthless, unwanted etc. Thankfully I have a meeting with my AA sponsor tonight If you do make sure you've something lined up first.* That'll probably sort things out. Did he tell you to pray for the c***, who has been assigned to the customer? That sort of advice/experience is usually well received! * The police department might be recruiting shortly... Edited June 9, 2020 by Jacksgranda 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real Saints Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 Hi guys! Thought I'd share this on here as it relates to the topic at hand. My debut album Grey Hairs and Black Dogs is out now. It details my struggles with mental health during the past six years. It's available to download and stream on iTunes, Spotify, Bandcamp and many other digital platforms. 20% of all proceeds will be going to Samaritans. It was a pretty expensive process, so I'd be extremely grateful for any downloads if you like what you hear (or even if you don't!). Bandcamp: https://olliewale.bandcamp.com/album/grey-hairs-and-black-dogs iTunes: https://music.apple.com/gb/artist/ollie-wale/1377941213 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/3TnAcivfAeqRzqA5V2FBRs 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venti Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 Hollyoaks with a depression/suicide story there. Hard watch. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thereisalight.. Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 (edited) On 08/06/2020 at 08:17, NJ2 said: It’s difficult mate but you’ve recognised it first and foremost. Even without the world turning to shit we all had down days so there’s certainly no shame in it. Try and make sure you’re doing what’s worked for you previously, exercise has been helping me clear my head when need be. Definitely this. If it hadn’t been for long walk since and hikes the last few months I dread to think where I’d be. Last week I also got my bike sorted up and I’m back cycling on average 15 miles a day. I haven’t done any excercise today and I feel worse for it mentally. It probably didn’t help that my mum was wanting me to look through a headstone brochure with her for my Dad. Hopefully I’ll get back exercising tomorrow and feel better for it Edited June 9, 2020 by Thereisalight.. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 Definitely this. If it hadn’t been for long walk since and hikes the last few months I dread to think where I’d be. Last week I also got my bike sorted up and I’m back cycling on average 15 miles a day. I haven’t done any excercise today and I feel worse for it mentally. It probably didn’t help that my mum was wanting me to look through a headstone brochure with her for my Dad. Hopefully I’ll get back exercising tomorrow and feel better for it That sounds a rough day mate, sorry for you man. Totally understandable it’s a down day. Try and get back out tomorrow and hopefully tomorrow is a better day mate 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thereisalight.. Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 12 minutes ago, NJ2 said: That sounds a rough day mate, sorry for you man. Totally understandable it’s a down day. Try and get back out tomorrow and hopefully tomorrow is a better day mate Thanks. Yeah hopefully tomorrow will be better! Looking at headstones and mum wondering what wording we should put on it really hit home. It’s crazy but I thought “there will be nobody to pick the wording to go on my headstone”. Brought a wee tear to me eye tbh 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 Thanks. Yeah hopefully tomorrow will be better! Looking at headstones and mum wondering what wording we should put on it really hit home. It’s crazy but I thought “there will be nobody to pick the wording to go on my headstone”. Brought a wee tear to me eye tbh I’m probably in a similar boat, maybe my niece or nephew when the reaper calls on me but it’s a grim thought and hopefully a long time away. Much can change before then and if it doesn’t we’ll be dead anyway, won’t really matter what it says. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thereisalight.. Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 8 minutes ago, NJ2 said: I’m probably in a similar boat, maybe my niece or nephew when the reaper calls on me but it’s a grim thought and hopefully a long time away. Much can change before then and if it doesn’t we’ll be dead anyway, won’t really matter what it says. That’s true. It’s just a shame to think of a life lived and then nobody to give a fck in death. At least you have a niece and nephew. I wish I had that 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted June 9, 2020 Share Posted June 9, 2020 That’s true. It’s just a shame to think of a life lived and then nobody to give a fck in death. At least you have a niece and nephew. I wish I had that Plenty folk will give a f**k mate. Folk who you don’t realise care, do. I’m very fortunate to be an uncle, they’re 11 and 13 though so wouldn’t care to hear that just now! I’m just an uncle they can chuck abuse at the two or three times a year I see them [emoji23] 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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