D.A.F.C Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 There are no problems, only challenges. Is that what Toyota said when the brakes on their cars failed? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
banana Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 I was in a meeting the other day, where someone was mentioned as 'taking a swivel chair position for a short period'. Not a clue what that's about. I'm going to give that person the benefit of the doubt and say they're well aware of corporate bullshit nonsense and was experimenting to see if anyone was going to pull them up on that particular phrase, or if folk were just going to pretend to understand. Top stuff, I'm going to try completely making stuff up in future meetings. "We're moving into the sheep-shearing phase of the project" "We should try reverse hourglassing the proposal" "Let's turn whiteboards into blackboards until we hear from Dave" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Does he also talk about things 'pacifically'? Seems the sort. I've not heard "pacifically" from him but yes, he is that sort. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Bairn Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Been asked to "take ownership of my own clients" lately Not entirely sure what that means tbh 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasy23 Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Been asked to "take ownership of my own clients" lately Not entirely sure what that means tbh Kidnapping I would have thought. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DigOutYourSoul Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 (edited) Blue Sky Thinking. It may have already been mentioned but a new phase in a project I've been involved in recently has been called the BST phase! The more meetings/involvement I've had with senior members of staff recently the more corporate nonsense I've been exposed too. Edited March 20, 2015 by DigOutYourSoul 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 Blue Sky Thinking. It may have already been mentioned but a new phase in a project I've been involved in recently has been called the BST phase! The more meetings/involvement I've had with senior members of staff recently the more corporate nonsense I've been exposed too. BullShiT phase. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted March 21, 2015 Share Posted March 21, 2015 Been asked to "take ownership of my own clients" lately Not entirely sure what that means tbh It's to do with re-introducing slavery. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Bairn Posted March 22, 2015 Share Posted March 22, 2015 It's to do with re-introducing slavery. I guessed as much. I'm surprised more than anything that an unpaid placement student who works one afternoon a week is given "clients" to "take ownership of" more than anything. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Just had a meeting about recruiting new employees in my company. So who is our target audience? "Anyone who doesn't currently work for the company". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Just had a meeting about recruiting new employees in my company. So who is our target audience? "Anyone who doesn't currently work for the company". I'm listening. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Sold. I'll PM you the job. Can you start Monday? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 (edited) Sold. I'll PM you the job. Can you start Monday? What exactly is a "jizzmopper"? Edit: never mind, I'm sure it's fine. See you next week. Edited March 27, 2015 by BigFatTabbyDave 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 Just had a meeting about recruiting new employees in my company. So who is our target audience? "Anyone who doesn't currently work for the company". I was with you right up to the work part. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DigOutYourSoul Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 The work is going through some kind of fucking stupid restructuring nonsense for about the 50th time since Ive been here. They dont want to rebuild silos and apparently this is my work community: WorkCommunity.jpg Dicks. Are you the pink triangle? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
banana Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 The work is going through some kind of fucking stupid restructuring nonsense for about the 50th time since Ive been here. They dont want to rebuild silos and apparently this is my work community: WorkCommunity.jpg Dicks. What the f**k am I looking at? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 The work is going through some kind of fucking stupid restructuring nonsense for about the 50th time since Ive been here. They dont want to rebuild silos and apparently this is my work community: WorkCommunity.jpg Dicks. I think whoever's wean did that is autistic. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 What the f**k am I looking at? Play Dough Stonehenge. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheScarf Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Looks like the opening sequence to the Krypton Factor. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nelsjfc Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Is this that minecraft that all the kids are talking about? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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