11thHour Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 I asked for a roll with square and tattie scone, the lassie gave me two bits of square (CHOKING FOR THE BOAB) and it was just too much meat for the one roll, had to take one off and eat it by itself and finish the rest on the roll. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Eaten too much for lunch and now I feel a bit sleepy. Snow White will dob you to the rozzers. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 Snow White will dob you to the rozzers.^^^Grumpy post Grimbo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 My missus (English) must have thought I needed a good patriotic lunch today and brought me... Haggis panini Scotch broth Irn Bru Caramel shortbread I then promptly managed to lock myself out of my office but fuelled by sugar I was able to toe punt it open. Nothing a joiner and a new yale lock won't sort. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
P45 Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 A haggis panini sounds the baws. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 My missus (English) must have thought I needed a good patriotic lunch today and brought me... Haggis panini Scotch broth Irn Bru Caramel shortbread I then promptly managed to lock myself out of my office but fuelled by sugar I was able to toe punt it open. Nothing a joiner and a new yale lock won't sort. ^^^Dopey2 post Grimbo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 A haggis panini sounds the baws. A tiny wee bit of cheese and red onion too. Does leave you a bit sluggish though. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilostmyself Posted October 19, 2015 Share Posted October 19, 2015 (edited) I like to pretend to my boss that I'm working while I'm on the train to justify leaving an hour early but the Scotrail wifi isn't consistent enough to stay connected to my works network :'( Edited October 19, 2015 by ilostmyself 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 I bought some porridge from Lidl that you make in the microwave. I thought today was a good a day as any to give it a whirl. Well I put the correct amount of milk in the bowl with the oats & banged it in the micro at 2.30 min as instructed & I now have a microwave that looks like it's been artexed, I do hope my missus won't ruin any of my new chisels when she discovers it? I now understand what it must be like for our African cousins to have to forego breakfast. Grimbo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 I bought some porridge from Lidl that you make in the microwave. I thought today was a good a day as any to give it a whirl. Well I put the correct amount of milk in the bowl with the oats & banged it in the micro at 2.30 min as instructed & I now have a microwave that looks like it's been artexed, I do hope my missus won't ruin any of my new chisels when she discovers it? I now understand what it must be like for our African cousins to have to forego breakfast. Grimbo Just tell her you were shagging the microwave. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 Just tell her you were shagging the microwave. Not sure of the etiquette here should I tell her that before or after I've kicked her in the pie? Grimbo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 (edited) Not sure of the etiquette here should I tell her that before or after I've kicked her in the pie? Grimbo During. Obviously the windows will have been opened and the heating turned up beforehand. Edited October 22, 2015 by DA Baracus 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 During. Obviously the windows will have been opened and the heating turned up beforehand. Sorry I'm not one of those new men, I can't multi-task. Grimbo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom McB Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 Trying to go for a shite in my work is murder, plenty of toilets but all of their entrances are within view of someone's desk, have to time it right so you can nip in undetected and take a good 10 minutes or so. 10 minutes? Not going for a shite imho. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 I bought some porridge from Lidl that you make in the microwave. I thought today was a good a day as any to give it a whirl. Well I put the correct amount of milk in the bowl with the oats & banged it in the micro at 2.30 min as instructed & I now have a microwave that looks like it's been artexed, I do hope my missus won't ruin any of my new chisels when she discovers it? I now understand what it must be like for our African cousins to have to forego breakfast. Grimbo Always, always cover your microwaved meals with a plate. Except the ready meals with the plastic cover, obviously Last time I cleaned our microwave, it looked like someone had turned it upside-down and spewed all over the ceiling. You don't tend to notice it when the thing's at waist height, but it becomes seriously mauchit very quickly without plate cover...and then it all drips down next time you're using it... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doc Sportello Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 (edited) When you're talking/about to talk on the phone, and you have to move the device from your ear to look at the screen and up the volume, see if it's ringing, enter a digit etc and the thing is fucking locked. And then you have to spend 5 seconds unlocking it, and you miss whatever happens on the other end. Does my fucking tits in. Edited October 22, 2015 by Doc Sportello 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 When you're talking/about to talk on the phone, and you have to move the device from your ear to up the volume, see if it's wringing, enter a digit etc and the thing is fucking locked. And then you have to spend 5 seconds unlocking it, and you miss whatever happens on the other end. Does my fucking tits in. If it's wringing, that's probably why nothing else works properly. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doc Sportello Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 (edited) If it's wringing, that's probably why nothing else works properly. I managed to edit it before you hit submit = a win for me. edit: it's a testament to P&B that I knew somebody was going to make that shite joke within 3 seconds of my spotting the error. And viola, less than a minute later there it is. Edited October 22, 2015 by Doc Sportello 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 I managed to edit it before you hit submit = a win for me. edit: it's a testament to P&B that I knew somebody was going to make that shite joke within 3 seconds of my spotting the error. And viola, less than a minute later there it is. Is someone on the fiddle? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 Give up now, Doc; it's only going to get worse 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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