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The Terrible Journalism & Tom English Thread


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2 hours ago, Miguel Simao said:

A soundbite from "Wee Baz" Ferguson saying that Warburton hasn't been given enough money is worthy of being headline news on Reporting Scotland apparently.

Guessing it's from this: http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/38924282

Does he ever talk about the club he manages? In fact, does he ever talk about any club other than Rangers?

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1 hour ago, DA Baracus said:

Fucking hell! Dundee fans at my work want him sacked and from what I hear most Dundee fans are losing patience with him and feel he's taken them as far as he can.

Also a load of the managers on that list are proven failures in the Premier League

True, but a fair few of them are fucking melts from Dundee Mad nursing a collective sense of entitlement that would make a *** blush. Fannying about in the bottom six is pretty much our level, perhaps even above it considering what an absolute shambles most of the last 20 years has been. 

The article though :lol:

Hartley being in it :lol:

Ramming it otherwise full of Premier League failures like Rogers :lol:

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12 minutes ago, jupe1407 said:

True, but a fair few of them are fucking melts from Dundee Mad nursing a collective sense of entitlement that would make a *** blush. Fannying about in the bottom six is pretty much our level, perhaps even above it considering what an absolute shambles most of the last 20 years has been. 

The article though :lol:

Hartley being in it :lol:

Ramming it otherwise full of Premier League failures like Rogers :lol:

The idea that Brendan Rodgers is a Premier League failure is wide of the mark.

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Barry Ferguson chats about how Rangers players need to toughen up - http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/rangers-stars-must-realise-how-9788375

"So there I was at Morrisons the other day, looking for a box of Shreddies Max.

I can’t find them and I’m starting to get agitated, walking up and down the cereal aisle, face like thunder. This woman walks up and asks if I need a hand.

She kindly helps me out and points me in the right direction. So I thank her very much and put them in my shopping trolley.

The next thing I see these three teenage boys laughing at me. One of them shouts something I can’t repeat in the pages of a family newspaper and I respond by saying something along the lines of ‘Wee man, I’ll wrap this trolley around your heid and knock you into those f***** Frosties over there!

Five minutes later I’m at the yogurt fridge. Raging. And I’m looking around to see where they’ve gone.’" 

"Archie Knox? I had bad dreams about this guy. I’d wake up in the middle of the night with my bed soaking"

Best part obviously being that the kids say something I can't repeat in a family newspaper before stating that he'd "wrap this trolley around your heid and knock you into those f***** Frosties over there" :lol:

 

Incredibly though -

"Me? I’ll be taking my team to Ayr United tomorrow looking to become the first Clyde side in something like 40 years to reach the Scottish Cup quarter-finals.

We’re massive underdogs but we want to go there and show that we can play football. And, yes, that fear of losing will be what drives me on."

Never mentions his club but as soon as they beat Brora, Arbroath and Stirling in the Cup he's highlight how incredible a job he's doing!  Only problem is that it isn't 40 years since they made the quarter finals - it happened in 2004-05!

 

 

Edited by The Minertaur
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8 minutes ago, Hammer Jag said:

That was a very entertaining read. Fair play to wee Barry. There's something very Alan Partridge-esq about how he name drops specific brands of cereal.

Magnificent.

I love the photoshop the Record did - 

 

utils.jpg

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22 minutes ago, The Minertaur said:

Barry Ferguson chats about how Rangers players need to toughen up - http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/rangers-stars-must-realise-how-9788375

"So there I was at Morrisons the other day, looking for a box of Shreddies Max.

I can’t find them and I’m starting to get agitated, walking up and down the cereal aisle, face like thunder. This woman walks up and asks if I need a hand.

She kindly helps me out and points me in the right direction. So I thank her very much and put them in my shopping trolley.

The next thing I see these three teenage boys laughing at me. One of them shouts something I can’t repeat in the pages of a family newspaper and I respond by saying something along the lines of ‘Wee man, I’ll wrap this trolley around your heid and knock you into those f***** Frosties over there!

Five minutes later I’m at the yogurt fridge. Raging. And I’m looking around to see where they’ve gone.’" 

"Archie Knox? I had bad dreams about this guy. I’d wake up in the middle of the night with my bed soaking"

Best part obviously being that the kids say something I can't repeat in a family newspaper before stating that he'd "wrap this trolley around your heid and knock you into those f***** Frosties over there" :lol:

 

Incredibly though -

"Me? I’ll be taking my team to Ayr United tomorrow looking to become the first Clyde side in something like 40 years to reach the Scottish Cup quarter-finals.

We’re massive underdogs but we want to go there and show that we can play football. And, yes, that fear of losing will be what drives me on."

Never mentions his club but as soon as they beat Brora, Arbroath and Stirling in the Cup he's highlight how incredible a job he's doing!  Only problem is that it isn't 40 years since they made the quarter finals - it happened in 2004-05!

 

 

Barry also says 'at least I had the advantage of being brought up in this city. I knew the rules' but as far as I'm aware he is from Hamilton and still lives there.

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Before I clicked out the link, I honestly thought what The Minertaur had written was some sort of spoof take on it.  A Leigh Griffiths-esque type blog. 

I honestly can't believe those are the words that are actually in the story?  Barry Ferguson wants the Rangers youth players of today waking up in the middle of the night, terrified of their coaches?  Wow! 

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Further research shows that Clyde made Scottish Cup quarter final in 1987-88 as well but before that it was 1966/67.

"Me? I’ll be taking my team to Ayr United tomorrow looking to become the first Clyde side in something like 40 years to reach the Scottish Cup quarter-finals."

No actually it's the 3rd time in the past 50 years you absolute moron.

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9 minutes ago, Malcolm Malcolm said:

Barry also says 'at least I had the advantage of being brought up in this city. I knew the rules' but as far as I'm aware he is from Hamilton and still lives there.

He's from Hamilton but stays down the Clyde Valley in a big fuck off house just past Garrion Bridge.

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39 minutes ago, The Minertaur said:

Barry Ferguson chats about how Rangers players need to toughen up - http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/rangers-stars-must-realise-how-9788375

"So there I was at Morrisons the other day, looking for a box of Shreddies Max.

I can’t find them and I’m starting to get agitated, walking up and down the cereal aisle, face like thunder. This woman walks up and asks if I need a hand.

She kindly helps me out and points me in the right direction. So I thank her very much and put them in my shopping trolley.

The next thing I see these three teenage boys laughing at me. One of them shouts something I can’t repeat in the pages of a family newspaper and I respond by saying something along the lines of ‘Wee man, I’ll wrap this trolley around your heid and knock you into those f***** Frosties over there!

Five minutes later I’m at the yogurt fridge. Raging. And I’m looking around to see where they’ve gone.’" 

"Archie Knox? I had bad dreams about this guy. I’d wake up in the middle of the night with my bed soaking"

Best part obviously being that the kids say something I can't repeat in a family newspaper before stating that he'd "wrap this trolley around your heid and knock you into those f***** Frosties over there" :lol:

 

Incredibly though -

"Me? I’ll be taking my team to Ayr United tomorrow looking to become the first Clyde side in something like 40 years to reach the Scottish Cup quarter-finals.

We’re massive underdogs but we want to go there and show that we can play football. And, yes, that fear of losing will be what drives me on."

Never mentions his club but as soon as they beat Brora, Arbroath and Stirling in the Cup he's highlight how incredible a job he's doing!  Only problem is that it isn't 40 years since they made the quarter finals - it happened in 2004-05!

 

 

:lol::lol::lol::lol:

That is absolutely fantastic.  I am in stitches at work reading that.

Fucking hell.  Absolutely brilliant. 

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This Telegraph piece is quite remarkable, see... 
https://t.co/dPnPaKgtmS
IMG_7879.thumb.PNG.5d60919fe4e280f060b46206e2d6ef3a.PNG

Someone got paid to write that. Money was earned due to that piece of utter tripe.
It said that Hartley got promoted to the Premiership with no money to spend - surely Dundee had the highest budget in the league that season? :lol:
Loads of the people in that article have had "a chance" at the Premier League. That's not to say that they don't deserve another, but you'd expect a bit more insight as opposed to: "This guy did well at a club, so he deserves a shot at the Premier League. He's done shite at every other club since? That doesn't matter anymore."
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