Granny Danger Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 Smartwatch. It's like Dick Tracey brought to life, you speak into it and it sends garbled messages. So the term 'Smartwatch' is a bit of a misnomer? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bold Rover Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 You have to speak to it in a German accent like the ones on Allo Allo Do it like Uncle Albert on OFAH to the German girl who didn't speak English. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 So the term 'Smartwatch' is a bit of a misnomer? Smarter than me probably. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 So the term 'Smartwatch' is a bit of a misnomer? Sorry Miss Nummer, I didn't order a gobble, just trying to post on my smart phone. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 Smarter than me probably. So the term 'Smartwatch' is a bit of a misnomer? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 So the term 'Smartwatch' is a bit of a misnomer? As the Fifers say, everything's relative. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 (edited) I done me back in at training on Thursday night, me right leg feels like me muscles have been torn off the bone. So I greeted off going to watch the match on Saturday. Is it my age? Edited February 1, 2016 by Grim O'Grady 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 I done me back in at training on Thursday night, me right leg feels like me muscles have been torn off the bone. So I greeted off going to watch the match on Saturday. Is it my age?No, it's because you are an unfit auld cnut who should be starting to take it easy. You are obviously to injured to give your usual sign-off signature. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 No, it's because you are an unfit auld cnut who should be starting to take it easy. You are obviously to injured to give your usual sign-off signature. I don't normally bother signing off in here to you bunch of senike auld c***s. Sciatica X 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 I don't normally bother signing off in here to you bunch of senike auld c***s. Sciatica X Try rubbing in some horse liniment, available from all good vets, you'll be out hurdling fences in no time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Try rubbing in some horse liniment, available from all good vets, you'll be out hurdling fences in no time. Make do & mend is my motto, was thinking a good cow pat rubbed on the troubled area should sort it. Is it gypsy day, I could do with some pegs. Am I allowed to say gypsy in here? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Make do & mend is my motto, was thinking a good cow pat rubbed on the troubled area should sort it. Is it gypsy day, I could do with some pegs. Am I allowed to say gypsy in here? It's usually bullshit and not cow shit that comes to mind when your involved old Grimbo. Do you want the pegs to clip on your nose to block the offending whiff of the applied medication? Perhaps maybe you should also get some lucky heather from the representative from the travelling fraternity to ward off any curse bestowed in case the term you used is derogatory. I can't keep up with what is and isn't acceptable name-calling any more. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 It's usually bullshit and not cow shit that comes to mind when your involved old Grimbo. Do you want the pegs to clip on your nose to block the offending whiff of the applied medication? Perhaps maybe you should also get some lucky heather from the representative from the travelling fraternity to ward off any curse bestowed in case the term you used is derogatory. I can't keep up with what is and isn't acceptable name-calling any more. Aye course the pegs are part of the medicinal compound, ya daft lummock. What the f**k would I want with pegs otherwise? Too many folk so easily offended these days. I will get the lucky heather though just in case. How long does the common gypsy curse last these days, I bet they aren't as good as the ones we got when we were lads, eh? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Ps. Wasn't it actually lucky WHITE heather? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Reported for racism 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Aye course the pegs are part of the medicinal compound, ya daft lummock. What the f**k would I want with pegs otherwise? Too many folk so easily offended these days. I will get the lucky heather though just in case. How long does the common gypsy curse last these days, I bet they aren't as good as the ones we got when we were lads, eh? Ps. Wasn't it actually lucky WHITE heather? And reported for daftlummockaphobia. I remember there used to be a Club exclusively for white heather, no other colour was allowed. Andy Stewart was the President I believe. They wouldn't get away with that nowadays, quite rightly. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 And reported for daftlummockaphobia.I remember there used to be a Club exclusively for white heather, no other colour was allowed. Andy Stewart was the President I believe. They wouldn't get away with that nowadays, quite rightly. The induction ritual of having your Jock tickled would also be frowned upon by the BBC these days. At least in public. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 The induction ritual of having your Jock tickled would also be frowned upon by the BBC these days. At least in public. It was positively encouraged back then I would imagine. I take it that a sprig of white heather was used for the said tickling. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted February 5, 2016 Share Posted February 5, 2016 I was at a funeral yesterday, my parents and all my aunts and uncles are long dead, now it's my generation that's starting to disappear. Two of my cousins are already dead (one was 13 months older than I, the other a couple of years younger). Anyway, this funeral was a brother-in-law, he was younger than I am, too. I was waiting for the funeral cortege to move off, and was chatting to the husband of one of my wife's cousins, we only ever meet at funerals. He said "The last time we met was Aunt Audrey's funeral". I said, "Ivan, one of these days there's going to be a funeral and there's only going to be one of us at it". I'll leave it on that cheery note. Another funeral today, that's the third one I've been at this year, and I missed one I should have been at. Anyway, this was another family funeral - my wife's aunt - so the usual crew were at it, although there was one less in attendance than at the previous one, and I said to Ivan "If this keeps up, there will be nobody left to come to ours", and he replied "I hope so!". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted February 5, 2016 Share Posted February 5, 2016 Another funeral today, that's the third one I've been at this year, and I missed one I should have been at. Anyway, this was another family funeral - my wife's aunt - so the usual crew were at it, although there was one less in attendance than at the previous one, and I said to Ivan "If this keeps up, there will be nobody left to come to ours", and he replied "I hope so!". You obviously got better. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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