NotThePars Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 5 hours ago, ICTChris said: When DAFC finally goes on a kill crazy rampage in his work, I hope he shouts something suitably P&B niche before the armed coppers do him in Park Hotel style. I can just hear the news report now “The attacks motives are unknown but moments before the gunman was cut down in a hail of gunfire he was heard to shout something about winding down the windows and turning the heat on full blast, intelligence sources believe this may be some sort of Isis code” "The gunman was heard to shout "GLOVES" as he popped off shots and ad lib jazz as his rampage continued" 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTChris Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 "The gunman was heard to shout "GLOVES" as he popped off shots and ad lib jazz as his rampage continued"I was looking for that guy on Facebook, he’s not there. I genuinely think he’s dead. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 "Let him have it, Tony!" 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 8 minutes ago, NotThePars said: "The gunman was heard to shout "GLOVES" as he popped off shots and ad lib jazz as his rampage continued" "Neighbours described him as one for the watching, with habits that included playing Football Manager while wearing pyjamas in his club colours" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 Bludgeon everyone to death with a dumbell and a copy of Condoleezza Rice's autobiography. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 "You seem upset." he said, gazing over the still twitching corpses of his colleagues. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 1 minute ago, welshbairn said: "You seem upset." he said, gazing over the still twitching corpses of his colleagues. "Thanks for playing" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 The assailant was said to have been armed with a club or bat like weapon, with he struck out at random, injuring many but fortunately not hitting others. Those lucky to have escaped unharmed described their good fortune as a 'swing and a miss'. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 "I STRONGLY ADVISE YOU NOT TO TAKE ME ALIVE, COPPER." 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thistle_do_nicely Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 (edited) 33 minutes ago, NotThePars said: "The gunman was heard to shout "GLOVES" as he popped off shots and ad lib jazz as his rampage continued" "After pulling out a 9mm pistol (believed to be engraved with images of actor Christian Bale from the movie American Psycho, footballer Dale Carrick pulling a similar facial gesture as was on the Christian Bale picture and, perhaps most strangely of all, an image of yet another footballer, Efe Ambrose, playing a saxophone superimposed with text saying that "there is no need to be upset", possibly a sick taunt in relation to what was about to unfold) and brandishing it at colleagues, the gunman is believed to have shouted that they were about to start playing a game. He is believed to have then shouted to colleagues that "I STRONGLY ADVISE you all to start running as fast as you fucking can." "The gunman put a chef's hat on, fired a round into the ceiling, and screamed "thanks for playing!" at the top of his lungs with a manic grin on his face, before hunting them down in a sick game of cat and mouse across the bulding. Smartphone footage and audio captured that some female victims were branded "averagey looking cockteases" before they were shot and murdered in cold blood" Edited June 30, 2020 by Thistle_do_nicely 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 A search of the property found a sex pram, ticket stubs from an Alexandre Burke concert in Peterhead, and a recipe for Mango Pizza. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 "Aye? You can calm doon.. On my ignore list!" 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 11 minutes ago, Mark Connolly said: "Thanks for playing, champ" FTFY 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotThePars Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 13 minutes ago, Mr. Alli said: "Aye? You can calm doon.. On my ignore list!" How about a magic trick? I'm gonna make this guy's posts disappear. TADA! They're... they're gone. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 [emoji1787][emoji1787][emoji1787][emoji1787] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 A search of the property found a sex pram, ticket stubs from an Alexandre Burke concert in Peterhead, and a recipe for Mango Pizza.And a £500 note 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon EF Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 The suspect vehemently denies it was him who carried out the attack and that it was actually his girlfriend. Under questioning he turned his back on the questioning officers, turned back around 30 seconds later with crudely put on lip stick and said "Hiya, this is D.A.F.C's burd here, lol". 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 The suspect vehemently denies it was him who carried out the attack and that it was actually his girlfriend. Under questioning he turned his back on the questioning officers, turned back around 30 seconds later with crudely put on lip stick and said "Hiya, this is D.A.F.C's burd here, lol". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 There was a delay in police responding to the incident when a witness called to report a gunman only to receive the answer "pics or get to..." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 30, 2020 Share Posted June 30, 2020 His last words as the olive green trousered soldiers took aim with half of Glasgow dead behind him. "Ooooh, ones for the watching!" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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