BFTD Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 ...so you've been bitten by the cosmic gamma rays of an exploding nuclear spider from Krypton (or something). Congratulations, you officially have a superpower! But, in a universe where all the good powers are taken by Superman, The Hulk, and Hawkeye, the only ones left are a bit...well, pish. No flight, super-strength, or x-ray vision for you, but there's bound to be a mediocre preternatural ability that you'd be satisfied with? Perhaps, like Mr Glass @Shandon Par, you may feel that you already have a minor superpower that you'd like to share with the class? I'd like the ability to freeze time when I enter REM sleep. Virtually useless for doing anything heroic/evil, but I've had so many nights of insomnia where the alarm clock went off about an hour after I dozed off and I wanted to die rather than get up. Imagine being able to throw the alarm away, sleep for ten hours, and wake up with the whole night ahead for shitposting on popular Scottish football forums. Heaven. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meldrew Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 (edited) the ability to feed 5000 people with just 5 loaves and 2 fish Edited November 14, 2021 by Meldrew 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weirdcal Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 The power of hindsight... An absolute b*****d of a power 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Joe Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 To be able to have a different recurring dream that doesn't involve East Fife reaching a Scottish Cup final and missing the game due to not being able to get dressed competently. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob in Denny Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 1 hour ago, BFTD said: ...so you've been bitten by the cosmic gamma rays of an exploding nuclear spider from Krypton (or something). Congratulations, you officially have a superpower! But, in a universe where all the good powers are taken by Superman, The Hulk, and Hawkeye, the only ones left are a bit...well, pish. No flight, super-strength, or x-ray vision for you, but there's bound to be a mediocre preternatural ability that you'd be satisfied with? Perhaps, like Mr Glass @Shandon Par, you may feel that you already have a minor superpower that you'd like to share with the class? I'd like the ability to freeze time when I enter REM sleep. Virtually useless for doing anything heroic/evil, but I've had so many nights of insomnia where the alarm clock went off about an hour after I dozed off and I wanted to die rather than get up. Imagine being able to throw the alarm away, sleep for ten hours, and wake up with the whole night ahead for shitposting on popular Scottish football forums. Heaven. Here was me thinking a post about the 'two cheeks' Mind you, the water into wine would be handy... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 I have magnetic knees that can seek out and collide with sharp corners of furniture. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 Perfect health, regardless of what I do, eat, drink etc. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotThePars Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 That one from Misfits where the guy could only control dairy was a funny concept. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 9 minutes ago, Raidernation said: Perfect health, regardless of what I do, eat, drink etc. Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's Chingandhookersman! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcat(The most tip top) Posted November 14, 2021 Share Posted November 14, 2021 The power of hindsight... An absolute b*****d of a powerI wish I’d thought of that one 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 The power of being able to turn on the TV at other people's houses at the first attempt, saving the whole "no, that one's for the sound system, that one's for the digibox and and it's this one that's for the TV... which needs to be on HDMI-2 btw". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coprolite Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 Prehensile nipples 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arabdownunder Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 The power to remember whether its recycle bin week or garden bin week 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mathematics Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 How 'bout the power to kill a yak, from 200 yards, away with mind bullets! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 I can name all the moons that orbit Mars. Maybe not today but sometimes I can. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smurph Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 I’d like the ability to double-jump. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venti Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 Hawkeye? He's fucking useless. Up there with Black Widow as the worst of superheroes. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 7 minutes ago, Slenderman said: Hawkeye? He's fucking useless. Up there with Black Widow as the worst of superheroes. He was a brilliant surgeon though. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soapy FFC Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 6 hours ago, Arabdownunder said: The power to remember whether its recycle bin week or garden bin week My pensioner neighbour has that superpower, so I just wait and see what he puts out. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
speckled tangerine Posted November 15, 2021 Share Posted November 15, 2021 Laying rancid silent farts with a poker face was one my grandad was a master of. And still a better superpower than fucking Hawkeye! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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