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Seagull Appreciation/ Condemnation Thread


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9 minutes ago, tongue_tied_danny said:

Gulls are bad c***s.

Crows are good c***s.

There's a bit of a turf war in my garden between gulls and crows. I'm on the side of the crows. They're sometimes on the back foot but they usually prevail. 

Some good crow v gull action here as well. I’m also on the crows side since one swooped down on Mrs Mullarkey whilst she was oor the back puffing on a Marlboro Super King.

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7 minutes ago, Bert Raccoon said:

I was attached once by a flock of seagulls, I did all I could really...

 

I ran, I ran so far away 

What did they attach you to? Evil kunts, so they are. Devious an’ aw’. Was it a lamp post? 

Edited by pozbaird
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1 hour ago, tongue_tied_danny said:

Gulls are bad c***s.

Crows are good c***s.

There's a bit of a turf war in my garden between gulls and crows. I'm on the side of the crows. They're sometimes on the back foot but they usually prevail. 

It's a triple threat match around here. Gulls vs Crows vs Magpies.

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1 minute ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

Or this mob.

download (20).jpeg

 

46 minutes ago, Bert Raccoon said:

I was attached once by a flock of seagulls, I did all I could really...

 

I ran, I ran so far away 

Does nobody read things anymore?

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13 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

 

Does nobody read things anymore?

No, if he'd put a photo it might have sunk in. I did put a photo, so I win.

16 minutes ago, Newbornbairn said:

Crows are b*****ds. They'll take lambs and peck the eyes out of sheep 

Crows and magpies are great. I've suspended my feeding programme until I work out a way to feed them, but exclude pigeons.

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I once went to Baynes at the end of breakfast roll time and the guy said I might as well have all the bacon that was left.

So he rammed the roll and it was full of really crispy bits from the bottom of the tray.

I was then mugged by these sky rats mid first bite.  I couldn't even go back and get another one. 

Soon after that i saw a 22 bus mince one and it popped like a balloon and I'll admit it. I was glad.

I also saw two of them attack and eat a rat alive.

Edited by invergowrie arab
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1 minute ago, invergowrie arab said:

I once went to Baynes at the end of breakfast roll time and the guy said I might as well have all the bacon that was left.

So he rammed the roll and it was full of really crispy bits from the bottom of the tray.

I was then mugged by these sky rats mid first bite.  I couldn't even go back and get another one. 

Soon after that i saw a 22 bus mince one and it popped like a balloon and I'll admit it. I was glad.

I saw one being popped by a car. It was a strange mixture of crunching and bursting. I was glad and nauseated at the same time.

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They do an excellent job of pissing off Tory farmers, Tory gammons spending their summer holidays at British seaside resorts and Tory teuchter football fans. Good guys.

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Some stupid old bitch across the road from us used to feed the beasts. Shite everywhere and screeching at all hours. She’s dead now, so things have improved. 

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2 minutes ago, Rugster said:

Some stupid old bitch across the road from us used to feed the beasts. Shite everywhere and screeching at all hours. She’s dead now, so things have improved. 

Thing with that is... feeding them actually harms them.

They become dependent and lose their independence. Most people feed them bread. Which isn't part of their natural diet and causes health problems.

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1 minute ago, tongue_tied_danny said:

Thing with that is... feeding them actually harms them.

They become dependent and lose their independence. Most people feed them bread. Which isn't part of their natural diet and causes health problems.

Maybe we could get Warburtons to sponsor a mass euthanizing of the b*****ds. Death by Toastie loaf. Surely we couldn't get done for that?

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