Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...

[welshbairn]

1 minute ago, throbber said:

 

Quite the inverse sadly. It was 6 weeks since we last had sex and on that occasion I had been wildly aroused for about 3 days solid in the build up and only lasted a few strokes. This time round I started off fine and then went limp as we changed positions, I started trying to rub some life back into the old wounded warrior but this just made her laugh awkwardly before we decided to call it a day and then we returned to the lounge and watched David Attenborough’ Dynasties in silence.

I’ll hopefully get the opportunity to disappoint her once more before the year is out.

 

Get Granny to give you some of his Viagra.

[Shandon Par]

1 minute ago, welshbairn said:

Get Granny to pump her properly.

FTFY.

[GordonD]

1 hour ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

Not sure. It is a possibility. 

Mods plz.

It's not worth arguing about. I'm not going to be like Rangers after the 2016 Cup Final and keep insisting I'm right against all the evidence. It's possible that I decided to reply before the edit went in and by the time I had checked and actually got round to it the added line was there and I missed it.

[Dons_1988]

the bbc sport app has changed its layout making it even more difficult to find the limited scottish football content on it

This has actually had me seething this week too.

[Sergeant Wilson]

3 hours ago, throbber said:

 

Quite the inverse sadly. It was 6 weeks since we last had sex and on that occasion I had been wildly aroused for about 3 days solid in the build up and only lasted a few strokes. This time round I started off fine and then went limp as we changed positions, I started trying to rub some life back into the old wounded warrior but this just made her laugh awkwardly before we decided to call it a day and then we returned to the lounge and watched David Attenborough’ Dynasties in silence.

I’ll hopefully get the opportunity to disappoint her once more before the year is out.

 

Just be content that you continue to disappoint us as well as ever.

[Swarley]

10 hours ago, throbber said:

Quite the inverse sadly. It was 6 weeks since we last had sex and on that occasion I had been wildly aroused for ....

 

 

[BillyAnchor]

Trying to understand the whole qualifying for the Euros rules has been incredibly frustrating. Threads here on it havent helped.

[Stellaboz]

Trying to understand the whole qualifying for the Euros rules has been incredibly frustrating. Threads here on it havent helped.

Aye but stop greetin about it on the radio, Willie.

[Mark Connolly]

Yodel.

Apparently they have delivered a parcel to me, by leaving it on the porch this morning. The slight issue with this is that we've had a glazier in fitting new glass in the front door, who hasn't seen any delivery driver, and there is no card through the door, despite Yodel's email telling me there is. Before anyone accuses the glazier, he'd probably have been better off stealing the neighbours wine delivery which did arrive, than a few cheap t-shirts. 

I then went on their live chat to ask where the parcel really is to be told that the tracking number doesn't match my address, and immediately be cut off from the live chat. When I restarted the chat (different adviser), I was told that the tracking number does match the address, but it will take up to 24 hours to track down and question the driver. 

How hard is it to actually fucking deliver a parcel, and/or work for a delivery company and not be a complete c**t?

[welshbairn]

1 minute ago, Mark Connolly said:

Yodel.

Apparently they have delivered a parcel to me, by leaving it on the porch this morning. The slight issue with this is that we've had a glazier in fitting new glass in the front door, who hasn't seen any delivery driver, and there is no card through the door, despite Yodel's email telling me there is. Before anyone accuses the glazier, he'd probably have been better off stealing the neighbours wine delivery which did arrive, than a few cheap t-shirts. 

I then went on their live chat to ask where the parcel really is to be told that the tracking number doesn't match my address, and immediately be cut off from the live chat. When I restarted the chat (different adviser), I was told that the tracking number does match the address, but it will take up to 24 hours to track down and question the driver. 

How hard is it to actually fucking deliver a parcel, and/or work for a delivery company and not be a complete c**t?

He probably delivered it to the wrong address by mistake. Blame the time pressure the drivers are under

[ayrshire_nomad]

Yodel.
Apparently they have delivered a parcel to me, by leaving it on the porch this morning. The slight issue with this is that we've had a glazier in fitting new glass in the front door, who hasn't seen any delivery driver, and there is no card through the door, despite Yodel's email telling me there is. Before anyone accuses the glazier, he'd probably have been better off stealing the neighbours wine delivery which did arrive, than a few cheap t-shirts. 
I then went on their live chat to ask where the parcel really is to be told that the tracking number doesn't match my address, and immediately be cut off from the live chat. When I restarted the chat (different adviser), I was told that the tracking number does match the address, but it will take up to 24 hours to track down and question the driver. 
How hard is it to actually fucking deliver a parcel, and/or work for a delivery company and not be a complete c**t?

Happened with an Amazon parcel of mine, I was at home when I seen an email saying I had signed for it. Searched the area around the front door to find nada. Phoned Amazon got a refund, never thought any more until I was putting something in my recycling wheelie bin and there was my parcel!
Kept the parcel, took the refund, f**k Amazon

[Salvo Montalbano]

Yodel.
Apparently they have delivered a parcel to me, by leaving it on the porch this morning. The slight issue with this is that we've had a glazier in fitting new glass in the front door, who hasn't seen any delivery driver, and there is no card through the door, despite Yodel's email telling me there is. Before anyone accuses the glazier, he'd probably have been better off stealing the neighbours wine delivery which did arrive, than a few cheap t-shirts. 
I then went on their live chat to ask where the parcel really is to be told that the tracking number doesn't match my address, and immediately be cut off from the live chat. When I restarted the chat (different adviser), I was told that the tracking number does match the address, but it will take up to 24 hours to track down and question the driver. 
How hard is it to actually fucking deliver a parcel, and/or work for a delivery company and not be a complete c**t?

They are the only company I know who don't agree with the old adage that "The Customer is always right" - Mrs Montalbano had an argument with them when they failed to deliver something to get work. Other delivery firms (I think maybe DPD?) get their drivers to take a photo of the door if they can't deliver, but Yodel refused to accept that their driver had 1. Failed to deliver a parcel and 2. Had lied about the fact they hadn't even tried. Think it took three or four attempts to get a refund as well. p***ks.

[KnightswoodBear]

I've had problems with Hermes.  Every other delivery company finds our address, even though it's not the easiest.  Hermes flat out tell lies.  

They claimed that their driver had tried to deliver a parcel a couple of times and that we weren't in.  I then asked for the times as I've got security cameras that film anyone that approaches the house or comes up the drive.

They then changed tack and said my address didn't exist.  Which is strange, because, it's where I live. 

Cancelled the order with the company and advised them that Hermes were at it.  

3 weeks later the parcel was sitting at the front door when I got home from work.  And broken. 

 

[MONKMAN]

I've had problems with Hermes.  Every other delivery company finds our address, even though it's not the easiest.  Hermes flat out tell lies.  
They claimed that their driver had tried to deliver a parcel a couple of times and that we weren't in.  I then asked for the times as I've got security cameras that film anyone that approaches the house or comes up the drive.
They then changed tack and said my address didn't exist.  Which is strange, because, it's where I live. 
Cancelled the order with the company and advised them that Hermes were at it.  
3 weeks later the parcel was sitting at the front door when I got home from work.  And broken. 
 

The fuckers were at it with me yesterday. The other half was waiting on a delivery from Hermes the other day and gave me strict instructions, that when he delivered to send back a parcel that we had sitting in the hall by the front door. As were going on holiday tomorrow, I was warned not to f**k it up.

As I lay on the couch, I noticed a van pulling away from my house and driving off round the corner. A quick look in the mail box, and there was a delivery slip from Hermes saying they’d tried to deliver. I quickly phoned the number listed on the slip and the c**t explained he’d be back soon to deliver the parcel, and take away the one for return. He was only round the corner and not even out the street.

I asked why he didn’t ring the door bell and try to deliver the parcel first time round, his excuse was that he didn’t think anyone was in. My car was in the drive.

Fucking moron.

[Sergeant Wilson]

17 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

I've had problems with Hermes.  Every other delivery company finds our address, even though it's not the easiest.  Hermes flat out tell lies.  

They claimed that their driver had tried to deliver a parcel a couple of times and that we weren't in.  I then asked for the times as I've got security cameras that film anyone that approaches the house or comes up the drive.

They then changed tack and said my address didn't exist.  Which is strange, because, it's where I live. 

Cancelled the order with the company and advised them that Hermes were at it.  

3 weeks later the parcel was sitting at the front door when I got home from work.  And broken. 

 

So have I, I'm glad someone has brought this into the open...

 

 

Oh Hermes, I thought you said herp...never mind.

[UsedToGoToCentralPark]

Football is cheap by comparison.

[Granny Danger]

Delivery companies pay their drivers shit and put them under enormous pressure.  They do this to keep prices down whilst making huge profits.  People want lower prices therefore are complicit in this.

It won’t improve any time soon.

 

[Romeo]

I've had problems with Hermes.

You can get cream for that mate.

[GordonD]

38 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

I've had problems with Hermes.  Every other delivery company finds our address, even though it's not the easiest.  Hermes flat out tell lies.  

They claimed that their driver had tried to deliver a parcel a couple of times and that we weren't in.  I then asked for the times as I've got security cameras that film anyone that approaches the house or comes up the drive.

They then changed tack and said my address didn't exist.  Which is strange, because, it's where I live. 

Cancelled the order with the company and advised them that Hermes were at it.  

3 weeks later the parcel was sitting at the front door when I got home from work.  And broken. 

 

With a dirty great bootprint on it?

[welshbairn]

18 minutes ago, MONKMAN said:

 

The fuckers were at it with me yesterday. The other half was waiting on a delivery from Hermes the other day and gave me strict instructions, that when he delivered to send back a parcel that we had sitting in the hall by the front door. As were going on holiday tomorrow, I was warned not to f**k it up.

As I lay on the couch, I noticed a van pulling away from my house and driving off round the corner. A quick look in the mail box, and there was a delivery slip from Hermes saying they’d tried to deliver. I quickly phoned the number listed on the slip and the c**t explained he’d be back soon to deliver the parcel, and take away the one for return. He was only round the corner and not even out the street.

I asked why he didn’t ring the door bell and try to deliver the parcel first time round, his excuse was that he didn’t think anyone was in. My car was in the drive.

Fucking moron.

 

He doesn't get paid if he doesn't deliver/pick up, just means he's got another drop the next day. I'd imagine he'd run out of time to finish his shift. I tried a spell with Hermes as a delivery driver, agreed to cover someone else's route as well as my own once. Was panicking as it was getting close to the 8pm cut off point and I still had loads to deliver. The software didn't allow that explanation so you had to pretend you'd delivered it or the customer wasn't home and no safe to leave it. Ended up delivering for free on a Sunday to clear the backlog. They may have changed the way they operate by now.