Hampden Diehard Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 People cancelling plans at the last minute and leaving me to come up with something to do with the Mrs and wee one. If she's a looker, send her to me and take the wee yin to laserquest. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 If she's a looker, send her to me and take the wee yin to laserquest. Gav make sure you get drinks & snacks included with the laser quest tickets. Happy to help. Grimbo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MEADOWXI Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-tayside-central-34533334 Crushed-arm factory worker wins £125,000 compensationA factory worker who had his arm crushed by machinery has won a £125,000 payout from his employer. Robert Faulds was severely injured when his right arm was pulled into machinery at the bottle-top factory in Bridge of Allan in September 2013. The 58-year-old said United Closures and Plastics blamed him for the accident and demoted him. The firm was also fined £12,000 after admitting health and safety breaches at Stirling Sheriff Court. Mr Faulds, from Falkirk, was working on a printing machine when the accident happened. His arm was dragged into the offset machine and crushed. The Health and Safety Executive took United Closures and Plastics to court over the incident, where the firm admitted failing to do a sufficient risk assessment of the machine and failing to ensure proper access. That should read worker received the compensation he deserved....... That headline reads like he should be standing outstanding the court with a bottle of champagne and a big cardboard cheque like a fucking lottery winner. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamdunk Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-tayside-central-34533334Crushed-arm factory worker wins £125,000 compensationA factory worker who had his arm crushed by machinery has won a £125,000 payout from his employer. Robert Faulds was severely injured when his right arm was pulled into machinery at the bottle-top factory in Bridge of Allan in September 2013. The 58-year-old said United Closures and Plastics blamed him for the accident and demoted him. The firm was also fined £12,000 after admitting health and safety breaches at Stirling Sheriff Court. Mr Faulds, from Falkirk, was working on a printing machine when the accident happened. His arm was dragged into the offset machine and crushed. The Health and Safety Executive took United Closures and Plastics to court over the incident, where the firm admitted failing to do a sufficient risk assessment of the machine and failing to ensure proper access. That should read worker received the compensation he deserved....... That headline reads like he should be standing outstanding the court with a bottle of champagne and a big cardboard cheque like a fucking lottery winner. How's the crushed arm getting along? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MEADOWXI Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 How's the crushed arm getting along? It has been bronzed and cast as trophy, To be waved as an award by people 'winning compensation', and will appear in future photos outside courts throughout the land alongside the cardboard cheque and bottle of champagne so the picture matches the crap headline the journalists write. In a statement Mr Faulds said ' Its what it would have wanted'. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tommy Nooka Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 Does he want to build a snowman? Or ride his bike around the halls? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redhead81 Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 Probably too icy in her bedroom for that tbf. Anyway I've just seen an advert for hair custard. Fucking hair custard. Hair custard?! How does that work - is it some kind of hair product or something? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-tayside-central-34533334 Crushed-arm factory worker wins £125,000 compensation A factory worker who had his arm crushed by machinery has won a £125,000 payout from his employer. Robert Faulds was severely injured when his right arm was pulled into machinery at the bottle-top factory in Bridge of Allan in September 2013. The 58-year-old said United Closures and Plastics blamed him for the accident and demoted him. The firm was also fined £12,000 after admitting health and safety breaches at Stirling Sheriff Court. Mr Faulds, from Falkirk, was working on a printing machine when the accident happened. His arm was dragged into the offset machine and crushed. The Health and Safety Executive took United Closures and Plastics to court over the incident, where the firm admitted failing to do a sufficient risk assessment of the machine and failing to ensure proper access. That should read worker received the compensation he deserved....... That headline reads like he should be standing outstanding the court with a bottle of champagne and a big cardboard cheque like a fucking lottery winner. Nothing good ever happens to me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 (edited) Petrol stations/mini marts: I go in just to get petrol and there's a queue at the tills because some people decide to do the weekly shopping when they pop in for petrol, holding everybody up. There should be a till for people who only want to pay for their petrol. Even if you do manage to pay quickly 9 times out of 10 the driver of the car at the pump in front of you will take ages to get back to their car 'cos they're shopping or yakking and there's a queue of cars behind you so you can't reverse out to get away. This always seems to happen when I'm in a hurry, never when I've got plenty of time. Also people in supermarkets who can't read simple signs like "7 items or less" or "baskets only" and start unloading a trolley full of stuff onto the belt, and of course they are so apologetic when you point it out to them, but do they load up and move to another till? Do they hell as like. Edited October 15, 2015 by Fae_the_'briggs 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bob the tank Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 How do you know he's having an affair two streets away? Are they noisy fuckers? Donna next door heard the rumour from her pal round the corner, and Willie over the road was so pissed off with the guy he told him we all knew about his shagging. The boy went red, bolted for his car and drove off at high speed, that was 5 weeks a ago, and he wasn't seen until last Friday, it seems he's got his cajones back and the affair is back on 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SJ1210 Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 Petrol stations/mini marts: I go in just to get petrol and there's a queue at the tills because some people decide to do the weekly shopping when they pop in for petrol, holding everybody up. There should be a till for people who only want to pay for their petrol. Even if you do manage to pay quickly 9 times out of 10 the driver of the car at the pump in front of you will take ages to get back to their car 'cos they're shopping or yakking and there's a queue of cars behind you so you can't reverse out to get away. This always seems to happen when I'm in a hurry, never when I've got plenty of time. Also people in supermarkets who can't read simple signs like "7 items or less" or "baskets only" and start unloading a trolley full of stuff onto the belt, and of course they are so apologetic when you point it out to them, but do they load up and move to another till? Do they hell as like. Pay at the pump then, problem solved 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Fog lights. Here's a wee guide: If you can see the motor that's half a mile down the road in front of you, you don't need your fucking fog lights on. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Out of interest, on a scale of say, 1-10, Donna? I'm gonna go with a 4. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Fog lights. Here's a wee guide: If you can see the motor that's half a mile down the road in front of you, you don't need your fucking fog lights on. It's that time of year when c***s know how to turn their fog lights on but have no idea how to turn them off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz FFC Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Folk use fog lights as a fashion accesory. Too stupid to realise it's not legal 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Out of interest, on a scale of say, 1-10, Donna? As a rule, I would give most women one. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisal Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Fog lights. Here's a wee guide: If you can see the motor that's half a mile down the road in front of you, you don't need your fucking fog lights on. Also in a line of traffic. If you can see 30 cars in front what makes you think the guy right behind can't see you? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Skidmarks Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Those videos being shared around Cuntbook and Shitter of wankers filming themselves 'pranking' unsuspecting shoppers in supermarkets by shouting at them. I hope they all die. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Those videos being shared around Cuntbook and Shitter of wankers filming themselves 'pranking' unsuspecting shoppers in supermarkets by shouting at them. I hope they all die. It's generally old folk or girls they do it to as well, never big lads. I'd love to see one of them do it and get smashed face first into a shelf full of beans. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bob the tank Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Out of interest, on a scale of say, 1-10, Donna? A gentleman never says moz, and her man is bigger than me and is a member here.B) 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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