smpar Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 I'm amazed he's that old. I thought he was about 14. I'll stop trying to groom him now. You *are* very flirtatious with me. I thought you liked my (rancid) patter*, didn't realise you just wanted your Nat King.*disclaimer: I am well aware that nobody likes my patter. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parsforlife Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 When I was visiting one of our offices down South, one of the guys tried to engage me in car chat.Given that I'd just overheard his interminable conversation with his colleagues, concerning the fact that he was in the midst of a 5-stage clay smearing-on then taking-back-off process, which would apparently have his "summer alloys" gleaming before being put back on, I made my excuses and left.The same guy thought I was mad flying down or taking the train to London. He apparently always drives to Scotland. I said that the furthest I drive is Sheffield, and that's only because it's a ball-ache to get there on public transport.He actually gave me that clichéd "I don't trust anything I'm not driving" chat.Do you, aye? Fly the fucking plane on holiday, do you?Muppet. Doesn't sound the type to go on holiday tbh, probably spends his time off outside schools/in supermarket car parks trying to impress 14 year olds. 'See the moter lads... beautiful she is, phwoar, gets me all the girls eh phwoar, bet you wish you could have one like er, phwoar...' 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 33 minutes ago, smpar said: It's a well-known fact that 87% of Fiat 500 drivers as 19 year old girls who study hair and beauty at college, drink more Costa coffees than seems humanly possible and are often seen Tweeting things such as "Maga on my mind" 25 minutes ago, Stellaboz said: You seem to know much about 19 year old girls? Aye. So tell me us more. Please note that it's entirely coincidental that my penis is out 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smpar Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 1 minute ago, DA Baracus said: Aye. So tell me us more. Please note that it's entirely coincidental that my penis is out Didn't look like a coincidence from where I'm sitting. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milton75 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Doesn't sound the type to go on holiday tbh, probably spends his time off outside schools/in supermarket car parks trying to impress 14 year olds. 'See the moter lads... beautiful she is, phwoar, gets me all the girls eh phwoar, bet you wish you could have one like er, phwoar...' Actually, depressingly, this is probably spot on. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
19QOS19 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Insult or complement? Your answer will influence my reply.. Definitely compliment 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smpar Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 4 minutes ago, 19QOS19 said: Definitely compliment w**k. Good guy. Aren't you about the same age? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
19QOS19 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 w**k. Good guy. Aren't you about the same age? 27 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 1 minute ago, 19QOS19 said: 27 Are you a musician? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/27_Club 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smpar Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 (edited) 4 minutes ago, 19QOS19 said: 27 Christ I'm miles off then, no idea what made me think that. 3 minutes ago, 8MileBU said: I'm surprised he's that old. Got the impression he was just a daft wee boy. You're still not wrong tbh. Edited October 27, 2016 by smpar 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
19QOS19 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 My boyish good looks smpar?... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeAreElgin Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Add Fiat 500 drivers to the list. Every single one driven badly; slow, hesistant, no awareness of what's going on around them etc. Dreadful drivers. I almost hired a Fiat 500 once. I arranged to pick up a car from Bristol Airport, and being the company man that I am, decided that as the Fiat was by far the cheapest option it was my only choice.The guy apologised and said that my chosen car was out of stock, but they had a Ford Fiesta for me. It's a bit like expecting the sack and getting off with a written warning. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smpar Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 My boyish good looks smpar?... That must be it 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 I had a fiat 500 last year. I was 32. Don't study hair and beauty and also have 3 kids. wasnt a sensible choice 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smpar Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 3 minutes ago, Rowan said: I had a fiat 500 last year. I was 32. Don't study hair and beauty and also have 3 kids. wasnt a sensible choice Congratulations for being in the #13% 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 I used to drive my works one sometimes. Like I stole it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 On tonights episode of The X-Files on Spike, an alien hides Skinner above a suspended ceiling, the same ceiling that wouldn't support a fart. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 1 minute ago, Zen Archer said: On tonights episode of The X-Files on Spike, an alien hides Skinner above a suspended ceiling, the same ceiling that wouldn't support a fart. Warn Adam. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 2 minutes ago, welshbairn said: Warn Adam. He's doing a Terry Waite atm, him and that radiator are inseperable. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasy23 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Currently watching Anthropoid. Why do film makers insist in making people speak English with phony accents? I know the main characters are all Czechs, I don't need them to speak like extras from a Compare the Meerkat advert to remind me of the fact. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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