Sweet Pete

Should probably get it seen, mate. I hurt my right knee badly having a kick about on red blaize in the rain one night, hurt like hell and was very swollen but I didn't get it seen to for about 4 years. Turned out I had cracked my knee cap on the underside and torn my cruciate ligament, it had healed to some extent by the time I got it looked at but still isn't right. I could really do withy getting a clean up operation, but think I'd have to go private and don't fancy the cost of it.

Take your passport and a recent (within 3 months) bank statement as proof of address. Remember to take any certificates of recent courses / qualifications (SVQ's, First Aid, Broo back-to-work / training courses etc.) and yourself. Don't forget to justify why you're wanting into their course and you'll be fine.

Depends on the job you're going for, if it's as a bouncer or a porn star then you're probably in luck.

The National Rail Enquiries site advises that there are ongoing disruptions due to the weather which will make my commute tonight rather long.

You may as well have kicked him in the bollocks, either way he's been humiliated / hurt

At 21? You're only too old for fisticuffs when you stop caring about things.

KiwiDB. I think.

Pigs in knickers, mate.

Ghost towns are pretty intriguing. Basically, when a town becomes abandoned and is left standing or in ruin without inhabitants. Often they're simply abandoned due to socio-economic changes, but the ones where a natural disaster or some other fate have befallen them are the most interesting. Centralia in Pennsylvania is one such town, and was the inspiration behind the town in the movie Silent Hill, though sadly not because it's full of monsters, simply as a result of the underground fire which has been burning since the 60s and resulted in almost all of the residents (eventually) moving out. There's still a handful of folk living in Centralia, despite Government attempts to move them and the fact that the Post Office have revoked their post code

Amen, brother. Pigs in knickers.

My trouble and strife (to be). Being a man makes you automatically in the wrong, even when you're not sure why, apparently. Clearly, women are c***s. All of them.

Sounds like she hasn't got the same idea as you from that.

Naw they urnae

I was going to Wembley for the Play Off Final, if those useless c***s hadn't fucked it by going down 3 - 0

My sister has just had to remove my 7 year old nephew from Clydebank Rugby Football Club after being informed by the club's webmaster on their official Facebook page that the reason the club's Facebook page has been full of posts congratulating Rangers on their title success is because Clydebank RFC is "a Proddy club".

No' my dug. Just random dugs' boabies.

Smurph sooks dugs boabies.

Everything you post on here is due to "a mate" of yours or "a few mates" of yours. How's about this, f**k off.

Opthalmic optician?

Bought myself a mountain bike last week. Picked it up on Friday, went home, set it up and headed out, only to find that I hadn't put enough pressure in the tyres so had to head back in and pump them up further. Take 2 found me riding round the block but struggling to find a suitable gear, couldn't find one that wasn't either too stiff or too loose. Ended up knackered very quickly. Went out again yesterday whilst hungover and found I was really struggling going uphill, even on just a slight gradient. Eventually got home knackered and inspected the bike to find that the rear wheel is out of alignment and is leaning against the frame at the left hand side of the wheel. I'm hoping that this added drag is the reason why I've been struggling so much and finding it nigh on impossible to build up any speed. Although, my crippling lack of fitness is definitely a factor. I'll adjust the rear wheel alignment over the next few days and then see how I fare after that.

Wub Superb They're guns for hire. For 20 pieces of silver, they'll remove the heart of your enemy and send it to his relatives wrapped in Clyde shirt.

I broke my old man's rib once, a proper crack where you could feel the crack from the outside. He didn't do anything for it, just went about business as usual IE went to work everyday welding and got drunk every night. Eventually it healed.

He's not texting me anything

Surely you would have tasted aniseed with every pint. It's either your own fault for not knowing what beer should taste like, or you did know and drank them anyway. Either way, Hell mend ye, as my gran would say.

Get the Desire, I'm posting this from one just now, they're the bollocks.