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Melanius Mullarkey

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Everything posted by Melanius Mullarkey

  1. Melanius Mullarkey
    Yes, can I help you?
  2. Melanius Mullarkey
    Do the Swallow Roundabout. ”The Granny Danger Circle - Welcome to Dundee”
  3. Melanius Mullarkey
    The catholic population is around 8% in Cowdenbeath according to some census figures found on the inter web. Obviously 8% is waaaaaay to high.
  4. Melanius Mullarkey
    It’s the ones that have the sign up saying “would you like to sponsor this roundabout” that annoy me for some reason.
  5. Melanius Mullarkey
  6. Melanius Mullarkey
    Try a steamroller.
  7. Melanius Mullarkey
    Alaskan pipeline. She can thank me later.
  8. Melanius Mullarkey
    My tap has not been on since 9am. And it’s still, what they call, “aff”.
  9. Melanius Mullarkey
    They’ve kept the M and ordered some ACARONI seats.
  10. Melanius Mullarkey
    They should just let Aberdeen into the group stages after that.
  11. Melanius Mullarkey
    I wonder what size of crowds Peppino Improbalo played in front of?
  12. Melanius Mullarkey
  13. Melanius Mullarkey
    The wife has just WhatsApped me a photo of an extension socket in the living room asking the question "what one's the telly plug?" What has happened to the female species?
  14. Melanius Mullarkey
    Brexit supporter found.
  15. Melanius Mullarkey
    The tap is definitely oan.
  16. Melanius Mullarkey
  17. Melanius Mullarkey
    Who the f**k would get up at that time if they didn't need to? Old folk and weirdos, that's who. Millenial found
  18. Melanius Mullarkey
    6.50? Get up you lazy c**t.
  19. Melanius Mullarkey
    Sports direct.
  20. Melanius Mullarkey
    I got asked how much a Slazenger hoodie was in Sports direct the other week. £12 for 2 I told them.
  21. Melanius Mullarkey
  22. Melanius Mullarkey
    Just spent the last hour taps aff in the paddling pool with zoider.
  23. Melanius Mullarkey
    Just looking for confirmation, thanks.
  24. Melanius Mullarkey
    What if your work is full of absolute twats?
  25. Melanius Mullarkey
    @Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo
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