Dan Steele

Nothing to worry about. It's just off to a George Clinton soul and funk all-nighter.

Crampons, worn by mountaineers when ice and snow climbing, were first used by the Sherpa peoples of Tibet from as early as the 17th century. In the Sherpa language the word crampon means "stick the boot in". Up until crowds were stopped from attending football games, crampon could still occasionally be heard being shouted at some fixtures, usually derby games. Linguists fear the word might disappear completely from the rich language of football.

I thought his physical comedy was a good partner to Seinfeld's lines. His disgraceful racist outburst years back is inexcusable.

Mum, there's a man at the door with a bill. Don't be daft. It'll be a duck in a coat.

Oh by the way, which one's Pink?

The grey rodent is a typical coloniser trying to take control of place by fair means of foul. They strip the natural resources, well they eat the bark of native trees, evidently. Like their American two-leggers who killed Native Americans with blankets carrying smallpox, they try to eradicate their red neighbours with a pox. Damn the Grey, long live the Red. And the best squirrel is without a doubt Secret Squirrel.

The media is, of course, more than just TV. There's already a thriving advertising industry, Scotland is a great draw for film companies, newspapers would still exist but with a Scottish outlook, Scottish cinema does exist, and I'm sure an independent Scotland would be able to offer financial incentives for more inward investment. There are enough highly trained technicians to have an independent Scottish TV and radio operation free from the London-centric BBC. Would you not, as a centrist thinker who currently feels ok with the status quo, not admit even grudgingly, that an independent Scotland could confront the problems that would arise and manage to come up with something better than what's unfolding via Westminster at the moment?

Tier 1 - A tradesperson can still enter and clear a blockage. Tier 2 - A tradesperson can still enter, but only by the rear entrance. Tier 3 - A tradesperson can enter but must sterilise any tool before a thorough plunging.

There's a few smashing sculptures at Stonehaven by Jim Malcolm, the Stoney Banksy. There's also a seal, a lighthouse and a biplane and other great works.

I think we need Todd to get this information into a Pi Chart.

That look tells me Adolf is just about to add "fatties that don't keep their boots clean" to the list.

Pubs and restaurants getting thumped due to them being dangerous places for spreading the virus makes me wonder about the cut price eating out (steady, Kenneth) scheme of a few weeks back. What was the point?

Geoffrey Cox: Tory MP failed to declare £400,000 in extra earnings

Well, that's the Union speaking about the Iraq war. Now, what was the SNP saying at Holyrood SNP leader John Swinney told MSPs: "The US and UK governments are pursuing an inevitable path to war and I believe it is our duty to steer this government away from this inappropriate approach "Threatening to take unilateral action does not uphold the UN's authority, it helps to destroy it and we as a parliament should have none of it." The SNP is insisting that no military action should take place unless the UN inspectors find real evidence of chemical, biological or nuclear weapons in Iraq and unless there is a fresh UN mandate for war.

There's a shop in Suffolk called Claude Cox Old & Rare Books.

That's all good and well but what happens when games are cancelled when a player tests positive, like Dundee v Forfar earlier? Forfar made all parties aware in the afternoon - which doesn't allow enough time for further Test & Protect procedures to be carried out.

"Did somebody mention a club? Quick, get outta here."

Runnin' with the Devil? Nah, he was a good guy.

Although best known from Wayne's World, the line "and monkeys might fly out of my butt" was first used by the Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard of Oz when the Flying Monkeys did, through trick editing, seem to fly out of her butt. The censors refused to allow it in the final cut and the scene was re-shot. Mike Myers used it to fine effect in Wayne's World as a nod to his favourite film.

Mrs SP would probably call it Mista Bit!

Time to pull the plug on these puns.

Just when you think you've heard it all. The bloke's probably got a vote as well. “If he’s sick, then they planted it when they tested him. It’s what they did to me when I went to hospital for my heart beating too fast. Two weeks later I got a cold,” he said. “It’s political. I don’t trust the US government at all. Who are they to mandate personal safety? I listen to Trump.”

I love the replies and furthermore, am beginning to think shes reads this thread. If she does read this, Devi, you are a ray of sunshine in our lives and you're lovely. If she doesn't, what a pile of shite.