Dan Steele

The plan sounded fine. Mrs SL wanted a tall plant for the hall. It would have to be a plastic one as there's not enough natural light for a real plant to survive. So far, so good. Except she got the measurements wrong and the only way this bloody triffid could fit in the hall would be to cut a hole in the ceiling. And now she tells me it would cost more than the purchase price to send it back. I'd pay to send her back right now.

Neil 'Let's Talk About Me' Oliver

Who sung Tiger Feet? Does that come with boiled or fried rice?

It's going to be interesting to see how this will pan out. Westminster set the precedent for holding a referendum when the Edinburgh Agreement was signed, so it'll be fun watching them get tied in knots trying to say no this time. Could the UN say no, given the right to self determination is in their charter? The rumblings from the EU seem to be broadly supportive but I'd guess they'd adopt the same "not interfering" card. Bet there's talk behind the scenes though. As long as the poll results continue to rise, Westminster will find it increasingly more difficult to refuse a second referendum. They do seem jittery at the moment so probably not long before the media campaign against independence kicks off.

Disappointed to see Irvine staying after that disgraceful pub incident. That's not a good signal for the Club to be sending. Oh aye, and he's not a very good player either.

"Enjoy", that's a belter. Especially hate it when it's barked as an order by your "server" as they bring your food.

The one that really annoys me is "step up to the plate". Oh, and "deplane".

Did the Bairn grow up to be Miriam Margolyes?

If that was the show where Hill came on with a mousetrap on his nose* it was the funniest routine I've seen. * Aren't there times when you'd do anything for a piece of cheese.

Early Anglo settlers organised irregular units to brutally attack and destroy Indigenous groups. This led to the Second Amendment enshrining these irregular forces into law. So initially not to protect freedoms being taken by government but part of the attempt to forcibly eradicate Native Americans standing in the way of Manifest Destiny. In Indian wars of mid to late 19th century, interestingly, the regular army stood by while local militias and settlers acting on their own used terror against Indigenous noncombatants. The more things change, eh?

There was a time when Spitting Image puppets were quite good, but that one is rubbish. And I don't even know who it's meant to be.

Always avoid the chocolate saw.

I blame those meddlin' kids and their blasted dog.

House!

Wilson, Keppel and Betty getting on a bit.

You know that post on the other thread about the pub you were in not serving any more beer? I take it you moved on. Time to stop now, though.

I think you've just been very politely barred!

I think you're infatuated with Jane, but steady on, that's taking things a bit far.

"Quite happy". Maybe those who couldn't make it to any friends or family funerals were a bit peeved.

I'm too scared to try mushroom foraging for that very reason but am well impressed with you trying. That omelette looks great. Definitely deserving of one of these

That'll never happen if the animal rights folk hear about it - mind the stooshie with beagles?

Congratulations and well done, Dr.

I see Boris Johnson's 'stick a Union Jack on everything' campaign is off to a flying start.