Dan Steele

A really strong performance from Forfar - at last. First game with more positives than negatives but is it too late to stay up? I'm no great fan of Irvine but he was really good but Nditi was excellent. Top marks for the front runners going for every ball. Well, except Dorris, of course. All in all a great Forfar performance but fairly crap from United. Yet they go through. Top marks to the young team for, erm, "finding" a ladder.

Forfar team more professional than the commentary team.

I've never watched a James Bond film.

I barbecued steaks on Christmas Day. Then plated up and eaten inside obv. Chucked on a few bananas for a wee while, peeled then sliced over vanilla ice cream and maple syrup. Easier with a gas bbq, but like you say, any time of year.

I'd like to think this the media getting back to normal but it would be great to watch the legal arguments unfold in court when counsel bring on Exhibit A, Cuthbert & B, Colin. Definitely a Netflix show in that. Elephant cake, though

I see M&S are taking Aldi to court because Aldi's Cuthbert the Caterpillar cake looks too much like their Colin the Caterpillar cake. Who'll win the cake war? Only one way to find out

I saw the photo of your hand job earlier, so that's a no from me.

Here's hoping you didn't slice two fingers off cutting the tape.

I think half the profit of a 99 is going towards a Prince Philip memorial garden.

A truly great sportsman. Who can forget his attempt to bring fly fishing in a horse and cart to a wider audience?

That's a damning statistic. With 51 players over 18 months, at what point do you realise fitba management isn't your strong suit?

Bless you.

Aye, he'd have his security team shoot the f*ck out of it ... but he did have the air of a man. Not now, though.

I'm becoming quite angry at the increasing use of the word "sprinkles" when it's clearly "hunners and thoosands". A Capital One radio advert is the most recent example.

Just asked Alexa what's happening in current Scottish news. Seems @johnnydun is asking awkward questions on P&B.

Aye, right.

Could be the start of a new Easter tradition.

Stainrod is one of the go-to saviours. Last week it was mentioned that his 90/91 side would be top 6 in current Premiership. Might have been an ironic comment, though.* *Doubt it.

Any day now. What I like to call the do da day.

A bit delusional? The Falkirk curve is great. Lead up to a game it's all about the great times still to come, during the game it's all about how crap the game is and bring back *insert favourite player/manager* from days gone by, after the game the anger really kicks in to sack the board mode. Don't get me wrong, it's magnificent stuff.

Joe Cocker does a version of that on Sheffield Steel and it is absolutely outstanding.

Pozbairding - well played, sir

If supporters were allowed in I'd start a crowdfunder to get this on an advertising board.

Two shots on goal, neither on target. That's lamentable - and not only in this game. There might be no public rumblings of discontent but if the board are not ripping shreds off Malcolm in private, they should be. This is quite simply not good enough.