throbber Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 3 hours ago, hk blues said: No idea, you've got me stumped. I have cracked ribs from all the laughter from this 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 3 hours ago, hk blues said: I did go out on a bit of a limb right enough. Maybe. Don't pine over it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 12 hours ago, scottsdad said: How much does it cost to get a tree cut down? Depends on the tree. Maybe a custodial sentence for the Sycamore Gap one at Hadrian's Wall. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eednud Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 1 hour ago, Fullerene said: Maybe. Don't pine over it. Fir goodness sake. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 10 hours ago, hk blues said: No idea, you've got me stumped. 10 hours ago, Fullerene said: I twigged you are trying to be funny here. You should stick to the original question and leave the puns out. 10 hours ago, hk blues said: I did go out on a bit of a limb right enough. 7 hours ago, Fullerene said: Maybe. Don't pine over it. 5 hours ago, Eednud said: Fir goodness sake. Saps. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 None of you are any help, you know... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Empty It Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 Borrow a chainsaw and do it yourself, what's the worst that could happen? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 2 hours ago, scottsdad said: None of you are any help, you know... Help? You didn't say help. You asked how much would it cost. I would love to help. I watched all those YouTube clips during lockdown. Cut a notch at the front, a horizontal cut in the middle and start cutting from the back. Sounds easy to me. If you have the chainsaw I'll give it a go. Oh and plan your escape route. I'll play that by ear. What fun. Let's go. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 2 hours ago, Empty It said: Borrow a chainsaw and do it yourself, what's the worst that could happen? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bennett Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 2 hours ago, Empty It said: Borrow a chainsaw and do it yourself, what's the worst that could happen? Getting a kicking from the polis in Paisley. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 i'm sick a more puns on this thread. If you want a tree cut down why not attract a beaver 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 (edited) 18 hours ago, Swarley said: Who is the P&Ber who always seems to maim/seriously injure themselves whenever they do DIY? Don't ask them. @Shandon Par - your chance to shine! Obviously the internet was made primarily for cat pictures and naked ladies, but people making a c**t of chopping trees down must be a distant third. @scottsdad, please remember to film the proceedings and we'll watch it in your memory. Edit: found a lovely guide to help, along with some nice pictures for colouring-in while waiting for the ambulance: https://extension.uga.edu/publications/detail.html?number=C1243&title=chainsaw-safety-preventing-common-tree-felling-accidents Edited May 20 by BFTD 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Florentine_Pogen Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 Shandon has some serious competition........ http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/sussex/7644404.stm "He kicked on the door of neighbour Steve Francis who dialled 999 and kept the limb in a bag of frozen pastry. Mr Francis said: "My first impression was it was a joke. Then I looked down at his arm and saw there was no arm."" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 10 hours ago, Fullerene said: Help? You didn't say help. You asked how much would it cost. I would love to help. I watched all those YouTube clips during lockdown. Cut a notch at the front, a horizontal cut in the middle and start cutting from the back. Sounds easy to me. If you have the chainsaw I'll give it a go. Oh and plan your escape route. I'll play that by ear. What fun. Let's go. I think there is a chainsaw lying in a back garden somewhere in Paisley that the owner won't need for a while. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted May 23 Share Posted May 23 Does anyone else get endless adverts for Star Trek Fleet Command (a PC game), or am I being targeted? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Central Belt Caley Posted May 23 Share Posted May 23 I know car insurance has flew up but has anyone else’s home insurance went up dramatically? I paid £212 last year to they’re wanting £496 off me to renew 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest Saints Fan Posted May 23 Share Posted May 23 12 minutes ago, Central Belt Caley said: I know car insurance has flew up but has anyone else’s home insurance went up dramatically? I paid £212 last year to they’re wanting £496 off me to renew Yes this is pretty much the norm with house insurance. Most have gone up by 30% since beginning of the year. Shop around! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted May 23 Share Posted May 23 1 hour ago, scottsdad said: Does anyone else get endless adverts for Star Trek Fleet Command (a PC game), or am I being targeted? I'm getting it too, and I don't own Captain Kirk PJs. The rule is that, if you're getting adverts for a mobile game, it's shite and will steal your money. No exceptions. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted May 23 Share Posted May 23 Ads? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted May 23 Share Posted May 23 3 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said: Ads? Every website I go to (except here). 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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