Things you want to share with P&B

[Sergeant Wilson]

3 hours ago, MixuFruit said:

Dunno but I found this in the reduced shelf

 

3 hours ago, Jacksgranda said:

Accessing pornography and graphic violence.

Good thinking, narrow escape though.

Ulrika might need these to hold her heid up soon. These women were handy in times of war to check over walls if it was safe to proceed.

Edited June 1, 2020 by Sergeant Wilson

[Derry Alli]

Do you sit at a desk in work? 

[BFTD]

43 minutes ago, GordonD said:

But who gets to decide who the 'potential offenders' are?

I know; that's the problem.

Help for people who have actively asked for it would be a good start.

[Cosmic Joe]

Blackbirds are my new favourite species. Always full of positivity. Sometimes I whistle back to Brian when he pays me a visit in my back garden. 

[Bigmouth Strikes Again]

10 minutes ago, Angusfifer said:

Blackbirds are my new favourite species. Always full of positivity. Sometimes I whistle back to Brian when he pays me a visit in my back garden. 

Beautiful song they have.

[jimbaxters]

9 minutes ago, Angusfifer said:

Blackbirds are my new favourite species. Always full of positivity. Sometimes I whistle back to Brian when he pays me a visit in my back garden. 

Birds in general are great (sit where you are Kenneth!). I always think of the morning singing as them shouting about the fact they are alive for another day. They are inspirational to us greetin' faced humans. Fighting every day just to eat and avoid being eaten but yet they sing their wee hearts out.

Just this morning I was outside having a coffee and a biscuit and the boldest wee sparrow ever came up to me. He actually jumped up about a metre from me and cheeped for a bit of biscuit, took it from my fingers and flew away. 

[Mark Connolly]

There seem to be loads of folk training for big fights. Cutting weight can surely be the only explanation for people still wearing massive coats in 23 degree heat

[Shandon Par]

2 minutes ago, Mark Connolly said:

There seem to be loads of folk training for big fights. Cutting weight can surely be the only explanation for people still wearing massive coats in 23 degree heat

 

[Mr Tourette]

Today?!

Edit: not sure why he's back on form; he's mostly been (bo)vine lately.

(best I've got, sorry)

 

I remember watching the CW cup final on TV many moons ago between Barca and Sampdoria. Cue much hilarity in the pub when Motson/Coleman/whoever welcomed the TV audience to the Wankdorff stadium in Bern

 

ETA - Quoted the wrong post about things called “w**k”. Can’t be arsed changing it

[Mark Connolly]

43 minutes ago, Mr Tourette said:

 

I remember watching the CW cup final on TV many moons ago between Barca and Sampdoria. Cue much hilarity in the pub when Motson/Coleman/whoever welcomed the TV audience to the Wankdorff stadium in Bern

 

ETA - Quoted the wrong post about things called “w**k”. Can’t be arsed changing it

The cricket stadium in Mumbai is called the Wankhede

[MONKMAN]

A woman just appeared to have abandoned two young children on the riverside path outside my flat window, and she’s somehow ended up in the Clyde. Loads of police outside my place just now, a baby in a pram and a toddler have been taken away by the police. The woman, I assume to be the mother, has just been dragged up completely drenched. She was as kicking out and swearing at the the 4 officers, as they were dragging her up and threw her into the back of a van.

[MONKMAN]

2 more kids have now appeared, as well as a couple of ambulances.

[GordonD]

1 hour ago, Mark Connolly said:

There seem to be loads of folk training for big fights. Cutting weight can surely be the only explanation for people still wearing massive coats in 23 degree heat

Shoplifting?

[Shandon Par]

28 minutes ago, throbber said:

She probably still has better parenting skills than you.

[MONKMAN]

18 minutes ago, MixuFruit said:

Poor kids. Incidentally those are nice flats down that way.

All things considered, it could have been a lot worse and I’d imagine the kids will be getting help. The flats are nice, pretty decent place to live actually. 

[heedthebaa]

4 hours ago, jimbaxters said:

Birds in general are great (sit where you are Kenneth!). I always think of the morning singing as them shouting about the fact they are alive for another day. They are inspirational to us greetin' faced humans. Fighting every day just to eat and avoid being eaten but yet they sing their wee hearts out.

Just this morning I was outside having a coffee and a biscuit and the boldest wee sparrow ever came up to me. He actually jumped up about a metre from me and cheeped for a bit of biscuit, took it from my fingers and flew away. 

There’s some lovely chirping in my back garden just now, can’t see it, but sat for an hour yesterday listening to it. I’ve also bought a green laser pen for the gulls, thought it was a pisstake but they don’t like it in the face 

[Melanius Mullarkey]

Getting a bit annoyed by the birds to be honest. There’s a chaffinch in particular that I’d happily punch its cheery little face if it came near me.  Noisy little shit. 
 

[Derry Alli]

1 hour ago, MONKMAN said:

A woman just appeared to have abandoned two young children on the riverside path outside my flat window, and she’s somehow ended up in the Clyde. Loads of police outside my place just now, a baby in a pram and a toddler have been taken away by the police. The woman, I assume to be the mother, has just been dragged up completely drenched. 

If it is how it reads (in my mind) then it's pretty harrowing. If she's just a jaked up mother who has fallen in the water then I hope she learns her lesson pretty sharpish. 

Edited June 1, 2020 by Mr. Alli

[Rugster]

5 hours ago, AsimButtHitsASix said:

So the work have put us all on these split shifts recently so we can all do social distancing at work. Instead of the usual 8 hour shifts we're doing 0800-1400 one week and 1400-1900 the next week but all on full pay. Now they're setting it up for folk to work at home to free up more space to get some furloughed workers back in. The part time shifts on full time wage will continue but now I have a bit of a dilemma. Do I do want to work from home, for eight hours, or come into work for five hours?

I’d fire you for starting a post with so. 

[Granny Danger]

3 minutes ago, Rugster said:

I’d fire you for starting a post with so. 

Bad enough verbally, being carried over into the written form is a banning offence IMO.