Tinder

[SweeperDee]

3 hours ago, velo army said:

Have a basket of fruit next to the bed and some other tasty diabetes friendly snacks.  She likes to take care of you, but often complaining about stuff is an indicator of a desire to be cared for. Having some luxury snacks next to the bed (or making her something as a prelude to said pumping) would help her feel heard and cared for. 

I dare say it will increase the quality of your sex life too.

I mean I’d like to think I’m a pretty caring partner, but the things she complains about relates mostly to her diabetes and her studying for her medicine exams. There’s f**k all I can do about that other than reassure her she will do absolutely fine with them.

A bowl of fruit beside the bed though…has anyone in the history of mankind done this or am I scurvy-tarnished swine? Sounds to me like OFTW behaviour. 

[velo army]

29 minutes ago, SweeperDee said:

I mean I’d like to think I’m a pretty caring partner, but the things she complains about relates mostly to her diabetes and her studying for her medicine exams. There’s f**k all I can do about that other than reassure her she will do absolutely fine with them.

A bowl of fruit beside the bed though…has anyone in the history of mankind done this or am I scurvy-tarnished swine? Sounds to me like OFTW behaviour. 

Who cares what is common or not? If she's experiencing mid-coital hypo-glycaemia (ken, I'm a silver-tongued bassa) then that's a circumstance that requires a solution. I'm not suggesting you permanently keep fruit there, but if you know she's coming over it might be a nice thing to have. I wasn't implying you were inconsiderate, but there's always ways in which we can be more caring.  Behaviour is broadly designed to either bring things towards us or push things away. Complaining is often a bringing in behaviour in which the person frames themselves as the victim in order to elicit sympathy and attention. I'm just offering an interpretation. It could be shite.

Food and sex are often closely linked. Perhaps you can find foods that are also aphrodisiacs (grapes and figs are particularly erotic) so you could do a bit of research on that. She's Malaysian so that gives you lychees, which are lovely and sweet, but also papaya. Melted dark chocolate with its magnesium and theobroma (which increases blood flow and dopamine production, increasing the sense of pleasure) can make it a bit of a playground (by dipping fruit into it and perhaps feeding each other) as well as keeping her blood sugar at the right level.

So aye, it might not be familiar territory, but it could be a playful way of addressing her concerns and increasing the intimate connection between the two of you.

Enjoy.

 

Edited May 9, 2023 by velo army

[alta-pete]

^^^ Dr Ruth found. 

[Sergeant Wilson]

8 minutes ago, velo army said:

Who cares what is common or not? If she's experiencing mid-coital hypo-glycaemia (ken, I'm a silver-tongued bassa) then that's a circumstance that requires a solution. I'm not suggesting you permanently keep fruit there, but if you know she's coming over it might be a nice thing to have. I wasn't implying you were inconsiderate, but there's always ways in which we can be more caring.  Behaviour is broadly designed to either bring things towards us or push things away. Complaining is often a bringing in behaviour in which the person frames themselves as the victim in order to elicit sympathy and attention. I'm just offering an interpretation. It could be shite.

Food and sex are often closely linked. Perhaps you can find foods that are also aphrodisiacs (grapes and figs are particularly erotic) so you could do a bit of research on that. She's Malaysian so that gives you lychees, which are lovely and sweet, but also papaya. Melted dark chocolate with its magnesium and theobroma (which increases blood flow and dopamine production, increasing the sense of pleasure) can make it a bit of a playground (by dipping fruit into it and perhaps feeding each other) as well as keeping her blood sugar at the right level.

So aye, it might not be familiar territory, but it could be a playful way of addressing her concerns and increasing the intimate connection between the two of you.

Enjoy.

 

Fucking hell!

[Mark Connolly]

It's just a new take on "I'm fat because every time I shag yer maw, she makes me a sandwich"

[SweeperDee]

12 minutes ago, velo army said:

Who cares what is common or not? If she's experiencing mid-coital hypo-glycaemia (ken, I'm a silver-tongued bassa) then that's a circumstance that requires a solution. I'm not suggesting you permanently keep fruit there, but if you know she's coming over it might be a nice thing to have. I wasn't implying you were inconsiderate, but there's always ways in which we can be more caring.  Behaviour is broadly designed to either bring things towards us or push things away. Complaining is often a bringing in behaviour in which the person frames themselves as the victim in order to elicit sympathy and attention. I'm just offering an interpretation. It could be shite.

Food and sex are often closely linked. Perhaps you can find foods that are also aphrodisiacs (grapes and figs are particularly erotic) so you could do a bit of research on that. She's Malaysian so that gives you lychees, which are lovely and sweet, but also papaya. Melted dark chocolate with its magnesium and theobroma (which increases blood flow and dopamine production, increasing the sense of pleasure) can make it a bit of a playground (by dipping fruit into it and perhaps feeding each other) as well as keeping her blood sugar at the right level.

So aye, it might not be familiar territory, but it could be a playful way of addressing her concerns and increasing the intimate connection between the two of you.

Enjoy.

 

I wasn’t having a go bud, sorry. 

[velo army]

1 minute ago, SweeperDee said:

I wasn’t having a go bud, sorry. 

I didn't take it that you were. I wasn't responding defensively. 

 

[carpetmonster]

46 minutes ago, SweeperDee said:

I mean I’d like to think I’m a pretty caring partner, but the things she complains about relates mostly to her diabetes and her studying for her medicine exams. There’s f**k all I can do about that other than reassure her she will do absolutely fine with them.

A bowl of fruit beside the bed though…has anyone in the history of mankind done this or am I scurvy-tarnished swine? Sounds to me like OFTW behaviour. 

If you’re stuck for a birthday present idea…

 

[Derry Alli]

I'd just like to remind the patrons of this topic that like myself, @velo army is single!

[SweeperDee]

Just now, Derry Alli said:

I'd just like to remind the patrons of this topic that like myself, @velo army is single!

No wonder, fruit bowls beside the bedside. 

[Mark Connolly]

1 minute ago, Derry Alli said:

I'd just like to remind the patrons of this topic that like myself, @velo army is single!

I think you'd make a lovely couple tbh

[Miguel Sanchez]

1 minute ago, Derry Alli said:

I'd just like to remind the patrons of this topic that like myself, @velo army is single!

 

32 minutes ago, velo army said:

Who cares what is common or not? If she's experiencing mid-coital hypo-glycaemia (ken, I'm a silver-tongued bassa) then that's a circumstance that requires a solution. I'm not suggesting you permanently keep fruit there, but if you know she's coming over it might be a nice thing to have. I wasn't implying you were inconsiderate, but there's always ways in which we can be more caring.  Behaviour is broadly designed to either bring things towards us or push things away. Complaining is often a bringing in behaviour in which the person frames themselves as the victim in order to elicit sympathy and attention. I'm just offering an interpretation. It could be shite.

Food and sex are often closely linked. Perhaps you can find foods that are also aphrodisiacs (grapes and figs are particularly erotic) so you could do a bit of research on that. She's Malaysian so that gives you lychees, which are lovely and sweet, but also papaya. Melted dark chocolate with its magnesium and theobroma (which increases blood flow and dopamine production, increasing the sense of pleasure) can make it a bit of a playground (by dipping fruit into it and perhaps feeding each other) as well as keeping her blood sugar at the right level.

So aye, it might not be familiar territory, but it could be a playful way of addressing her concerns and increasing the intimate connection between the two of you.

Enjoy.

 

 

7 hours ago, Derry Alli said:

Stick a jammie dodger up her arse and aim for the wee heart.

Different ends of the spectrum there though, mate.

[velo army]

21 minutes ago, Derry Alli said:

I'd just like to remind the patrons of this topic that like myself, @velo army is single!

Are you the one that put that spyware on my phone?

[velo army]

24 minutes ago, SweeperDee said:

No wonder, fruit bowls beside the bedside. 

And melted chocolate 

[SweeperDee]

 

1 minute ago, velo army said:

And melted chocolate 

That’s how you get ants. 

[thomas]

1 hour ago, velo army said:

Who cares what is common or not? If she's experiencing mid-coital hypo-glycaemia (ken, I'm a silver-tongued bassa) then that's a circumstance that requires a solution. I'm not suggesting you permanently keep fruit there, but if you know she's coming over it might be a nice thing to have. I wasn't implying you were inconsiderate, but there's always ways in which we can be more caring.  Behaviour is broadly designed to either bring things towards us or push things away. Complaining is often a bringing in behaviour in which the person frames themselves as the victim in order to elicit sympathy and attention. I'm just offering an interpretation. It could be shite.

Food and sex are often closely linked. Perhaps you can find foods that are also aphrodisiacs (grapes and figs are particularly erotic) so you could do a bit of research on that. She's Malaysian so that gives you lychees, which are lovely and sweet, but also papaya. Melted dark chocolate with its magnesium and theobroma (which increases blood flow and dopamine production, increasing the sense of pleasure) can make it a bit of a playground (by dipping fruit into it and perhaps feeding each other) as well as keeping her blood sugar at the right level.

So aye, it might not be familiar territory, but it could be a playful way of addressing her concerns and increasing the intimate connection between the two of you.

Enjoy.

 

Tldr, kick her in the pie and tell her to stop moaning.

[velo army]

5 minutes ago, SweeperDee said:

 

That’s how you get ants. 

They eat insects in certain parts of Malaysia mate.....

 

[Bert Raccoon]

2 hours ago, velo army said:

Who cares what is common or not? If she's experiencing mid-coital hypo-glycaemia (ken, I'm a silver-tongued bassa) then that's a circumstance that requires a solution. I'm not suggesting you permanently keep fruit there, but if you know she's coming over it might be a nice thing to have. I wasn't implying you were inconsiderate, but there's always ways in which we can be more caring.  Behaviour is broadly designed to either bring things towards us or push things away. Complaining is often a bringing in behaviour in which the person frames themselves as the victim in order to elicit sympathy and attention. I'm just offering an interpretation. It could be shite.

Food and sex are often closely linked. Perhaps you can find foods that are also aphrodisiacs (grapes and figs are particularly erotic) so you could do a bit of research on that. She's Malaysian so that gives you lychees, which are lovely and sweet, but also papaya. Melted dark chocolate with its magnesium and theobroma (which increases blood flow and dopamine production, increasing the sense of pleasure) can make it a bit of a playground (by dipping fruit into it and perhaps feeding each other) as well as keeping her blood sugar at the right level.

So aye, it might not be familiar territory, but it could be a playful way of addressing her concerns and increasing the intimate connection between the two of you.

Enjoy.

 

It becoming like Channel 4 after 11pm in here 

[Guest ICTFCwife]

10 hours ago, SweeperDee said:

I’ve expanded my fairly limited scope of people I’m attracted to and have been seeing this Asian/Malaysian bird for a couple of months from Tinder. Lovely girl, smart, going to be a doctor, very “housewife-y” in that she insists on doing things for me, always does the dishes, that sort of thing. Great ride as well. 
 

However, she is diabetic. This in of itself is not an issue, my grandfather was diabetic and he was the love of my life. She goes on about it…quite a lot though. Like, probably more than a regular diabetic would. Like she defines herself by it. Yes, diabetes is awful, it’s a pain in the arse and especially when you’re not a typical fat person who gets it cause they eat too much sugary shite. It must be hard for her to balance medicine and being diabetic but I know there is support in place for NHS staff with diabetes. 
 

It might be new to me but she checks her sugars with that wee arm monitor thing and a phone app during sex, and depending she might need to go get a biscuit or a dextrose tablet. What am I supposed to do? 
 

Ach, I’m being a moan. I’m very lucky, I’m actually going through a tough time in my life and she’s been a light in it. She does like a whinge though. 

Have a tube of fruitpastilles and a banana on the bed stand that way it’s within easy reach for her and she can keep going and bobs your uncle 

Edited May 9, 2023 by ICTFCwife

[BFTD]

Speaking of which, not a single suggestive banana near that genital fruitbowl above.

I don't know what the world is coming to.