fuzzydunlop Posted April 5, 2019 Share Posted April 5, 2019 20 hours ago, UsedToGoToCentralPark said: On 02/04/2019 at 14:54, fuzzydunlop said: Heres another one for you… Again my old department. Essentially the team I looked after were support/admin for a large salesteam. The sales guys are out on patch trying to win orders and hit their targets. As the salesguys have pretty heavy targets they also get some pretty sweet rewards, commission, company paid holidays etc The team I managed were based in an office dealing with After Sales customer enquiries but on a salary only. This as you can imagine riles up the office team who feel they also do a good job and deserve an extra reward. At every appraisal I did with them they would moan about not getting ‘perks’. I’d remind them that they did not have targets or the risk of working in sales where guys are given the sack regularly for not hitting targets. Also if people want to do that type of work they should apply instead of working in admin. However a couple of girls in the office were going great guns all the time about not getting any rewards so eventually I took the request to one of my managers meetings with our Directors and suggested it might help morale to give them something and after a particularly good year a few years ago there was some money in the budget to be used as a reward. I think due to taxes and maybe terms of employment the team weren’t allowed to be just given money in their wages as reward. However, and this is where it got interesting. The Director responsible for my department sent an email out saying “in light of a great year, please keep this date free for a day trip”. However the day of this trip was to be a Saturday as we couldn’t do it in work time. No one was told what the trip was, just to keep the day free and to let him know if they could attend. Now I’m not one for any works events during my own time. However, we were given plenty of notice and it was intriguing so I was up for it. I was sure booze would be involved with it being a Saturday so decided I’d give it a go. The other two girls who had done the lions share of the moaning quickly dismissed it and said they weren’t giving up their weekend(they didn’t have kids either) to do something work related. Leading upto the event there was rumours of what it would be and these two cows kept laughing at everyone else and making snide comments about doing something crap like going bowling or paintballing. At any opportunity they would say things to the rest of the team like “can’t believe you are going to spend free time at work”. When they were corrected that it wasn’t actually “work” they would respond with “well it might as well be”. The day before it at work we were told to meet at the Train Station early the following morning so it immediately took a more interesting turn. You could also see the two that had decided not to go were already regretting their decision and started asking lots of questions as if we knew what it was. “remember text us as soon as you know”… So the few of us who decided to go met at the station the next day. Turns out we got first class train tickets to London. Met the Director who got us p*ssed in a few pubs. He then took us for lunch up the Shard(oh yes Kenneth!) for a slap up meal in a private room. Everyone was then given £250 gift vouchers. Few pubs after it and then back on the train and home for 6pm(I should say I live in Leicester). Turned out to be a great day out. Monday morning back at work, everyone who had gone was buzzing and the two who hadn’t gone were visibly livid. The only let down was they were give then £250 vouchers as well which I think they had been raging about since the Saturday as they had been texted to say we’d all got them. Brilliant, I thought the ending was going to be people trying to claim OT for it as well. ha to be fair i wouldn't have put it passed them! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crawford Bridge Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 (edited) The quality control guy at my work has doctored some paperwork to move the blame for a huge f**k-up (30 grands worth) on to my shift leader. We managed to find the original, non-doctored sheets. Bye bye you snakey c**t. Edited April 9, 2019 by Crawford Bridge Brain donner standard of spelling. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 3 hours ago, G_Man1985 said: Arseholes What’s the story? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 4 minutes ago, Crawford Bridge said: Buy buy you snakey c**t. Hmmm, you sure it was the QC guy? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crawford Bridge Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 Just now, Busta Nut said: Hmmm, you sure it was the QC guy? Absolutely, he's done it before. He's also out his depth. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scary Bear Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 The quality control guy at my work has doctored some paperwork to move the blame for a huge f**k-up (30 grands worth) on to my shift leader. We managed to find the original, non-doctored sheets. Buy buy you snakey c**t.What’s he buying? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crawford Bridge Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 1 minute ago, Scary Bear said: What’s he buying? Shit! Good spot. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 hmmmm 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 32 minutes ago, Crawford Bridge said: Absolutely, he's done it before. He's also out his depth. 24 minutes ago, Scary Bear said: What’s he buying? Paddling pools. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 48 minutes ago, G_Man1985 said: 1 hour ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: What’s the story? 31 hours reduced to 21. Working 4 days. 3 days off are all split. Quite shit but just got to get on with it. Back to other job and see what or if they can offer Aye, that’s shite. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 Since moving office I’ve noticed a little clique that sit all day in the coffee area gossiping. Walking past them today it dawned on me, I’ve yet to see either of them do anything but sit and drink coffee all day in the corner. How the f**k is stuff like that never noticed? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 3 minutes ago, mizfit said: Since moving office I’ve noticed a little clique that sit all day in the coffee area gossiping. Walking past them today it dawned on me, I’ve yet to see either of them do anything but sit and drink coffee all day in the corner. How the f**k is stuff like that never noticed? You should shmooze a bit and find out their secret. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 3 hours ago, mizfit said: Since moving office I’ve noticed a little clique that sit all day in the coffee area gossiping. Walking past them today it dawned on me, I’ve yet to see either of them do anything but sit and drink coffee all day in the corner. How the f**k is stuff like that never noticed? Do you work at my work? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted April 10, 2019 Share Posted April 10, 2019 12 hours ago, mizfit said: Since moving office I’ve noticed a little clique that sit all day in the coffee area gossiping. Walking past them today it dawned on me, I’ve yet to see either of them do anything but sit and drink coffee all day in the corner. How the f**k is stuff like that never noticed? How often do you walk past the coffee area? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted April 10, 2019 Share Posted April 10, 2019 14 hours ago, mizfit said: Walking past them today it dawned on me, I’ve yet to see either of them do anything but sit and drink coffee all day in the corner. How the f**k is stuff like that never noticed? It probably is noticed and your gaffer is too much of a shitebag to deal with it. We have a guy in here who literally takes days to send a simple email, recently his late replies and the tone of his eventual reply has cost us somewhere in the region of £100K in future work (which has now gone to our biggest competitor). It wasn't until that f**k up that our gaffer has said anything to him, despite being copied to all correspondence, and even then he was just taken to an office and asked to explain himself - explanation accepted and matter closed. You need to do something especially fucking bad to get sacked in here, but I think costing the company upwards of £100K is probably deserving of an official warning at least. Most gaffers would rather any issues just disappeared without them having to confront people. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnthebaptistist Posted April 10, 2019 Share Posted April 10, 2019 I'm contemplating sacking one of our employees, I have two to pick from. Question is, in this modern age is rock, paper, scissors or the tossing a coin acceptable to pick between them ? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted April 10, 2019 Share Posted April 10, 2019 I'm contemplating sacking one of our employees, I have two to pick from. Question is, in this modern age is rock, paper, scissors or the tossing a coin acceptable to pick between them ? Have a poll on here, let P+B decide. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MEADOWXI Posted April 10, 2019 Share Posted April 10, 2019 1 hour ago, johnthebaptistist said: I'm contemplating sacking one of our employees, I have two to pick from. Question is, in this modern age is rock, paper, scissors or the tossing a coin acceptable to pick between them ? Apparently sacking the ugly one isn't PC either 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsr Posted April 10, 2019 Share Posted April 10, 2019 I apparently survived the latest office cull. No idea how. I'm spectacularly lazy and never thought myself particularly good at hiding it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted April 10, 2019 Share Posted April 10, 2019 51 minutes ago, nsr said: I apparently survived the latest office cull. No idea how. I'm spectacularly lazy and never thought myself particularly good at hiding it. They probably think it's a cover, and you're actually really productive... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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