carpetmonster Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 I have to say that I feel so jealous of oaksoft and so inadequate that Im thinking of going home to my house which isn't in the country and to cry into the file containing all of my mortgage statements to see how long I still have to go and also my pension statements. There's not much point carrying on today tbh.Meh, Wunfy could quite rightly say his gaff was a detached abode too. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 On 17/02/2020 at 14:13, L'immortale Par said: My brother got sent to work on a porn film by the job centre. He didn’t do any snagging but had to play the role of a photographer, photographing the shagging. Not a chance porn jobs go through the Job Centre. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 28 minutes ago, Busta Nut said: Not a chance porn jobs go through the Job Centre. London in the 80s - used to be all sorts of "inappropriate" postings. He was pretty surprised but fairly chuffed. It was just a "film extra" role. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 (edited) 1 hour ago, Busta Nut said: Not a chance porn jobs go through the Job Centre. There's a lot dodgier jobs than that on their website. Guy I met had a job on an Amsterdam sex show. His bit was to go on for the finale with a cucumber and stick it in the end orifice of a chain of conjoined bodies. 10 shows a day. Edited February 19, 2020 by welshbairn 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Arch Stanton Posted February 19, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted February 19, 2020 There's a lot dodgier jobs than that on their website. Guy I met had a job on an Amsterdam sex show. His bit was to go on for the finale with a cucumber and stick it in the end orifice of a chain of conjoined bodies. 10 shows a day. Were people in the audience gherkin off? 22 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
101 Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 (edited) 1 hour ago, welshbairn said: There's a lot dodgier jobs than that on their website. Guy I met had a job on an Amsterdam sex show. His bit was to go on for the finale with a cucumber and stick it in the end orifice of a chain of conjoined bodies. 10 shows a day. What was his job title? Cue Cum Brer? Edited February 19, 2020 by 101 Wrong Q 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 My good lady and myself took in a sex show while we were in Amsterdam. It is possibly the least sexy thing I have ever seen. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 28 minutes ago, Dee Man said: My good lady and myself took in a sex show while we were in Amsterdam. It is possibly the least sexy thing I have ever seen. She's good with the kids though. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 1 hour ago, Dee Man said: My good lady and myself took in a sex show while we were in Amsterdam. It is possibly the least sexy thing I have ever seen. Never seen one myself but a female colleague did the same and she said it was just two folk fucking. Also, wrong thread? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 1 hour ago, Dee Man said: My good lady and myself took in a sex show while we were in Amsterdam. It is possibly the least sexy thing I have ever seen. Did anybody else initially read that as "took part in a sex show"? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AsimButtHitsASix Posted February 24, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted February 24, 2020 (edited) We had a lad in work. Not an evil guy: just a total idiot. Started the same time as him and the first thing we noticed about him being a bit of a melt was he was the kind of guy who if ye said "I've been to Timbuktu" he'd been to "Timbukthree". Harmless idiot we all thought. In training he loudly explained to us all how mental illness wasn't real and how he doesn't believe in anxiety and depression. This was when we were in training to deal with vulnerable customers with anxiety and depression. Great start. A few other things that showed him up as a fud was him referring to a girl we work with who might be trans as "it" rather than "her" and a weird habit of doing an impression of any customer he spoke to who didn't have a standard "white person" accent. If he spoke to a Mr Chan he would tell us about it while doing a bad, racist impression of a Chinese man and if he spoke to a Mr. Singh it was a bad, racist impression of an Indian man and so forth. He never done it he spoke to an American or Aussie or German for instance. Only PoC. He would do it loudly while we repeatedly told him to shut it. There was a wonderful day when he was complaining about things Chinese people do before I listed a few of the things he said and said "My girlfriend doesn't do any of that" and watched him try and squirm out of it. Later that day he said something similar about Romanians and, again, I said "my ex never done an of them". He said making jokes about stereotypical aspects of different races was fine because we took the piss out of him for coming from Ayrshire. As annoying as he is none of us wanted him to lose his job so just kept telling him to shut it or tried to explain what a melt he was but it was always in one ear and out the other. Anyway the other week he was sitting next to one of our colleagues who is originally from Pakistan and spent a good period of time explaining why "P*ki" isn't a racist term. Another colleague (dunno who) overheard this and reported it to HR so he had a disciplinary meeting set up. Guy's already had his probation extended so can be let go at any time and it's not looking good. One of my pals heard what happened. He turns up to the room for the disciplinary and it smells a wee bit so the first thing he says when goes in? "Smells a bit like the Wuhan fish market in here. You had some Chinese guys in?" There's a bit of a stunned silence in the room. Rather than realise his mistake he just presumes no-one got the joke. "You know. Because of that Coronovirus" He got let go. Edited February 24, 2020 by AsimButtHitsASix 25 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 On 19/02/2020 at 22:47, GordonD said: Did anybody else initially read that as "took part in a sex show"? Yes 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 Wishing @ICTJohnboyluck in his search for a new job. 16 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin.Hood Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 People who smoke who take extra breaks... 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.A.F.C Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 Struggling to find something else with same pay and its been rough seeing people who were promoted unable to perform their role without being coddled through it by the boss.One of them is literally told what to say at meetings or hands over the important stuff.In a way I guess that's why they wanted people without technical skills or backbone because they are insecure?Now getting asked to dig them out a hole caused by the promotions as one of them did my job. Absolute brass neck of these f3ckersAye I will jump through hoops while you scheme and come up with shite and move the goalposts between three people when we dont even need one supervisor.Its only professional pride that keeps me doing a good job. It's not just me other people are feeling the same and two went to hr about it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeWhoWalksBehindTheRows Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 On 19/02/2020 at 15:03, welshbairn said: There's a lot dodgier jobs than that on their website. Guy I met had a job on an Amsterdam sex show. His bit was to go on for the finale with a cucumber and stick it in the end orifice of a chain of conjoined bodies. 10 shows a day. Good work if you can get it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philpy Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 The girl from the office (wid not) constantly complains about the toilet smelling after people using it. I'm going to start eating roses to make my shites smell better [emoji849][emoji849] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 I started my new job today and it turns out that Jurgen Klopp works there too. Small world. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carpetmonster Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 The girl from the office (wid not) constantly complains about the toilet smelling after people using it. I'm going to start eating roses to make my shites smell better [emoji849][emoji849]The Mrs got me some beer with rose petals in it for Valentine's Day. Arse wasn't any less hanging the morning after than usual. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted February 24, 2020 Share Posted February 24, 2020 4 hours ago, D.A.F.C said: Struggling to find something else with same pay and its been rough seeing people who were promoted unable to perform their role without being coddled through it by the boss. One of them is literally told what to say at meetings or hands over the important stuff. In a way I guess that's why they wanted people without technical skills or backbone because they are insecure? Now getting asked to dig them out a hole caused by the promotions as one of them did my job. Absolute brass neck of these f3ckers Aye I will jump through hoops while you scheme and come up with shite and move the goalposts between three people when we dont even need one supervisor. Its only professional pride that keeps me doing a good job. It's not just me other people are feeling the same and two went to hr about it. What is it you do? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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