c***s on the road

[senorsoupe]

After my 8 hours of driving this weekend became 10 hours, here is a list of people and things who qualify for this category

1. People who don't turn their lights on when it's absolutely chucking the rain down, especially if you have a grey, silver, black, or white car.  I CAN'T FUCKING SEE YOU!!

2. People who waste everyone's time at toll booths.  A) You need to go to the correct window, if you end up in the cash only lane and try to use a credit card I need to engineer a corporate merger between my foot and your ass.  Also, when you get to the cash window, have money ready!  Even if you don't have exact change, have it ready to give to the attendant!  

3. Caravans and RV's, pretty self-explanatory.  People should need a bus license to drive these North American monster RV's

4. People who are afraid to pass a police car, even if the police are going slowly.  Was on a stretch of autoroute (motorway) and a cop was doing exactly the speed limit creating a huge slowdown behind him because everyone was afraid to pass

5. People who tailgate.  Especially people who tailgate in the passing lane, and then when you move over to let them by they just chill out in your blind spot instead of passing you.  I moved for you b*****ds!

6. People who slow down and gawk and accidents or broken down vehicles.  

7. Transport Quebec for the poor design of interchanges and never-ending construction

8. Clouds: you know what you've done

9. My stomach for being upset on the day I had to make a long drive

I did not have a good day yesterday

 

Edited September 4, 2018 by senorsoupe

[Jacksgranda]

2 minutes ago, senorsoupe said:

After my 8 hours of driving this weekend became 10 hours, here is a list of people and things who qualify for this category

1. People who don't turn their lights on when it's absolutely chucking the rain down, especially if you have a grey, silver, black, or white car.  I CAN'T FUCKING SEE YOU!!

2. People who waste everyone's time at toll booths.  A) You need to go to the correct window, if you end up in the cash only lane and try to use a credit card I need to engineer a corporate merger between my foot and your ass.  Also, when you get to the cash window, have money ready!  Even if you don't have exact change, have it ready to give to the attendant!  

3. Caravans and RV's, pretty self-explanatory.  People should need a bus license to drive these North American monster RV's

4. People who are afraid to pass a police car, even if the police are going slowly.  Was on a stretch of autoroute (motorway) and a cop was doing exactly the speed limit creating a huge slowdown behind him because everyone was afraid to pass

5. People who tailgate.  Especially people who tailgate in the passing lane, and then when you move over to let them by they just chill out in your blind spot instead of passing you.  I moved for you b*****ds!

6. People who slow down and gawk and accidents or broken down vehicles.  

7. Transport Quebec for the poor design of interchanges and never-ending construction

8. Clouds: you know what you've done

9. My stomach for being upset on the day I had to make a long drive

I did not have a good day yesterday

 

"Driving slowly" is not the same as "doing exactly the speed limit".

[coprolite]

5 minutes ago, senorsoupe said:

After my 8 hours of driving this weekend became 10 hours, here is a list of people and things who qualify for this category

1. People who don't turn their lights on when it's absolutely chucking the rain down, especially if you have a grey, silver, black, or white car.  I CAN'T FUCKING SEE YOU!!

2. People who waste everyone's time at toll booths.  A) You need to go to the correct window, if you end up in the cash only lane and try to use a credit card I need to engineer a corporate merger between my foot and your ass.  Also, when you get to the cash window, have money ready!  Even if you don't have exact change, have it ready to give to the attendant!  

3. Caravans and RV's, pretty self-explanatory.  People should need a bus license to drive these North American monster RV's

4. People who are afraid to pass a police car, even if the police are going slowly.  Was on a stretch of autoroute (motorway) and a cop was doing exactly the speed limit creating a huge slowdown behind him because everyone was afraid to pass

5. People who tailgate.  Especially people who tailgate in the passing lane, and then when you move over to let them by they just chill out in your blind spot instead of passing you.  I moved for you b*****ds!

6. People who slow down and gawk and accidents or broken down vehicles.  

7. Transport Quebec for the poor design of interchanges and never-ending construction

8. Clouds: you know what you've done

9. My stomach for being upset on the day I had to make a long drive

I did not have a good day yesterday

 

Re: no 7

where to?

[senorsoupe]

Just now, coprolite said:

Re: no 7

where to?

Near Montreal, the interchange between Autoroute 30 and Autoroute 10 has waay too many merge points so traffic gets bunged up really easily.  On Friday it took a half hour to get from one autoroute to the other.  I was driving from Ottawa to my hometown (where my family lives) in the Eastern Townships of Quebec (south of Sherbrooke).  It was a holiday weekend here.

[Thistle_do_nicely]

Had my dad in the car to drop him off in Helensburgh recently; while going on my merry way a shitbox car in front of me stopped in the middle of the road and put its hazards on. My Dad quite quickly started muttering and cursing them; me, still at this point believing that no one could possibly be so staggeringly selfish/incompetent/lacking in basic courtesy  or self awareness, believed they'd maybe broken down or something. There was ample space that they could have pulled into were they dropping someone off; surely, surely something was wrong with the car.

Spoiler

About 10 seconds after stopping, and just as I was about to get into gear and attempt to go past them as it wasn't clear what the f**k was going on (when I say right in the middle of the street I mean literally in the middle, inbetween the left and right lanes rather than, y'know, at the SIDE OF THE ROAD NEXT TO THE KERB LIKE LITERALLY EVERY OTHER PARKED CAR THAT STOPS OR PARKS UP ON THAT FUCKING ROAD EVER, THERE WERE EVEN A FEW CARS ALREADY THERE THEY COULD HAVE USED AS AN EXAMPLE OF THIS AMAZING CONCEPT AND PULLED IN FRONT/BEHIND OF WITHOUT EVER EVEN HAVING TO GO INTO REVERSE, AHHHHHHHHHH), someone hops out the front passenger seat and waves goodbye to the driver before trundling towards one of the houses, at which the car in front finally decides to move off .

I may also have died a little inside, but at this point I'm not really sure if there's anything left in there anyway.

[SaintDougie]

14 minutes ago, Thistle_do_nicely said:

Had my dad in the car to drop him off in Helensburgh recently; while going on my merry way a shitbox car in front of me stopped in the middle of the road and put its hazards on. My Dad quite quickly started muttering and cursing them; me, still at this point believing that no one could possibly be so staggeringly selfish/incompetent/lacking in basic courtesy  or self awareness, believed they'd maybe broken down or something. There was ample space that they could have pulled into were they dropping someone off; surely, surely something was wrong with the car.

  Reveal hidden contents

About 10 seconds after stopping, and just as I was about to get into gear and attempt to go past them as it wasn't clear what the f**k was going on (when I say right in the middle of the street I mean literally in the middle, inbetween the left and right lanes rather than, y'know, at the SIDE OF THE ROAD NEXT TO THE KERB LIKE LITERALLY EVERY OTHER PARKED CAR THAT STOPS OR PARKS UP ON THAT FUCKING ROAD EVER, THERE WERE EVEN A FEW CARS ALREADY THERE THEY COULD HAVE USED AS AN EXAMPLE OF THIS AMAZING CONCEPT AND PULLED IN FRONT/BEHIND OF WITHOUT EVER EVEN HAVING TO GO INTO REVERSE, AHHHHHHHHHH), someone hops out the front passenger seat and waves goodbye to the driver before trundling towards one of the houses, at which the car in front finally decides to move off .

I may also have died a little inside, but at this point I'm not really sure if there's anything left in there anyway.

Don't ever drive in France mate, by the sounds of it you'll come back in a wooden box post fatal heart attack!

The French (South of France specifically) will literally just stop in the middle of a main street of a town or village, jump out and just pop into the bank for 15 minutes, completely abandoning their car.  Leaving everyone else not on two wheels to just sit there tooting their horn and await the individuals return. 

It is however holey accepted and normal behavior. 

Edited September 4, 2018 by SaintDougie

[Melanius Mullarkey]

Two words:

Fucking taxi driving c***s

[Thistle_do_nicely]

1 minute ago, SaintDougie said:

Don't ever drive in France mate, by the sounds of it you'll come back in a wooden box post fatal heart attack!

The French (South of France specifically) will literally just stop in the middle of a main street of a town or village, jump out and just pop into the bank for 15 minutes! Leaving everyone else not on two wheels to just sit there tooting their horn and await the individuals return. 

It is however holey accepted and normal behavior. 

I've heard that Italy can be a bit like this - sure my Dad mentioned that he was in a rental car out there while on holiday a few years ago and saw someone park their car on a roundabout!

[welshbairn]

3 hours ago, coprolite said:

4. People who are afraid to pass a police car, even if the police are going slowly.  Was on a stretch of autoroute (motorway) and a cop was doing exactly the speed limit creating a huge slowdown behind him because everyone was afraid to pass

Would you really overtake a police car driving at the speed limit?

[senorsoupe]

4 minutes ago, SaintDougie said:

Don't ever drive in France mate, by the sounds of it you'll come back in a wooden box post fatal heart attack!

The French (South of France specifically) will literally just stop in the middle of a main street of a town or village, jump out and just pop into the bank for 15 minutes! Leaving everyone else not on two wheels to just sit there tooting their horn and await the individuals return. 

It is however holey accepted and normal behavior. 

That is definitely more of a Southern French thing, when I was in Northern France last year I never noticed anyone doing that but have seen it in the South, seemed very odd to me.

[TheScarf]

Fuds who sit in the outside lane doing the speed limit.  

Now I know it's the limit, but everyone is a bit naughty once in a while and wants to do 75 or 80 on the dual/motorway.  It's when there's nothing in the inside lane and they're sort of going 'fuck you I'm doing the limit, you can stay behind me'.  Instead of moving across and letting me past.

It's like they're deciding what speed I should go, If I want to do 75 or 80 I'll fucking do it.  If the rozzers pull me over then it's my fault.

[SaintDougie]

8 minutes ago, senorsoupe said:

That is definitely more of a Southern French thing, when I was in Northern France last year I never noticed anyone doing that but have seen it in the South, seemed very odd to me.

Aye, they're very laid back in the South, too bloody hot to get worked up over the little things to be fair. They care very little for material things, like how your car looks compared to the neighbours etc... No keeping up with the Jones's down there.

[senorsoupe]

2 minutes ago, SaintDougie said:

Aye, they're very laid back in the South, too bloody hot to get worked up over the little things to be fair. They care very little for material things, like how your car looks compared to the neighbours etc... No keeping up with the Jones's down there.

I would say that a good 75% of the cars in Marseille are dented.  I asked someone about why they seem to care less about that and the person just shrugged and said that a dented car was less likely to be stolen

[Zen Archer (Raconteur)]

12 minutes ago, TheScarf said:

Fuds who sit in the outside lane doing the speed limit.  

Now I know it's the limit, but everyone is a bit naughty once in a while and wants to do 75 or 80 on the dual/motorway.  It's when there's nothing in the inside lane and they're sort of going 'f**k you I'm doing the limit, you can stay behind me'.  Instead of moving across and letting me past.

It's like they're deciding what speed I should go, If I want to do 75 or 80 I'll fucking do it.  If the rozzers pull me over then it's my fault.

You do realise that there are people who will come up behind you wanting to go faster than that, things like this can escalate out of control.

Just drive at the speed limit FFS.

[senorsoupe]

21 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

Would you really overtake a police car driving at the speed limit?

Over here they are  more lenient about speed limits, you can get away with 10 or 15 KPH over the limit without the police bothering to pull you over. 

[TheScarf]

10 minutes ago, Zen Archer said:

You do realise that there are people who will come up behind you wanting to go faster than that, things like this can escalate out of control.

Just drive at the speed limit FFS.

Yes, and as a non-cunt on the road, I let them past.

[welshbairn]

9 minutes ago, senorsoupe said:

Over here they are  more lenient about speed limits, you can get away with 10 or 15 KPH over the limit without the police bothering to pull you over. 

Unless the cop just happens to be in a filthy mood.

[Newbornbairn]

It's an overtaking lane, not a fast lane. If you're not overtaking, gtf out of the lane whether you're doing 50 or 90.  Same goes for the centre lane if there's three - it's an overtaking lane, not the lane where you put the car in cruise control, pull your bunnet over your eyes, shove your thumb up your arse and recreate the bass line of My Sharona with your sphincter you fuckingcuntwomble!

[Trackdaybob]

Is this the bit  where I come in and say there's nothing wrong with speeding (when conditions permit of course. And they do occasionally, go on, admit it  ) then some of you get all high and mighty on your high horses because you rigidly believe that the speed limit + 1 mph = instant death to all the nuns and kittens??? Or something? 

 

 

 

 

Obvious troll is obvious..................

Teatime, I'm off to the Mess. 

[senorsoupe]

5 minutes ago, Trackdaybob said:

Is this the bit  where I come in and say there's nothing wrong with speeding (when conditions permit of course. And they do occasionally, go on, admit it  ) then some of you get all high and mighty on your high horses because you rigidly believe that the speed limit + 1 mph = instant death to all the nuns and kittens??? Or something? 

 

 

 

 

Obvious troll is obvious..................

Teatime, I'm off to the Mess. 

I have to say I agree with you, as previously mentioned over here they are generally pretty permissive with mild speeding, I have never heard of anyone getting done for going 10 KM/h (6 MPH) or less over the speed limit, generally most people drive between 10 and 20 KM/h over the limit on the motorways without problem.  The police will pull you over if you are going obviously faster than everyone and/or driving aggressively but mild speeding is generally tolerated except in school zones.