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Middle class Scottish things


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When I was a child, I used to go to my auntie's once a week for my tea. Said aunt insisted that I say: "Please may I leave the table?" on finishing the meal. On my asking on any occasion what was for tea. the same aunt would invariably reply: "Shite with sugar on it," Dundee, eh?

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4 hours ago, Busta Nut said:

Having a working class person come in as a Cleaner is 100% middle class eh?

Should people only employ middle class cleaners? 

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5 hours ago, alta-pete said:

Once a week in this house. Although the bint never showed up today. Apparently she was taking her stepdad to his cancer appointment. As if! 

Madame Alta-Pete with Lovely Feet a bit allergic to Pledge and Marigolds ?

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24 minutes ago, Florentine_Pogen said:

Madame Alta-Pete with Lovely Feet a bit allergic to Pledge and Marigolds ?

We were discussing our distressing predicament with the neighbour earlier this evening. 

I don’t think she even knows where the hoover is kept. If challenged, I suspect she’d think Pledge & Marigolds was some new chi chi couturier. 

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Just now, alta-pete said:

We were discussing our distressing predicament with the neighbour earlier this evening. 

I don’t think she even knows where the hoover is kept. If challenged, I suspect she’d think Pledge & Marigolds was some new chi chi couturier. 

My wife phoned me last week as she couldn't work the washing machine. 

We've had it 5 years.

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3 minutes ago, scottsdad said:

My wife phoned me last week as she couldn't work the washing machine. 

We've had it 5 years.

Years ago I was driving my wife's car, which she had for two years,  and put the lights on halfway through our journey, she looked at a light down near the handbrake and asked 'what does that button do?'

It was the fuel cap release button, I nearly drove the car off the road laughing

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1 minute ago, scottsdad said:

My wife phoned me last week as she couldn't work the washing machine. 

We've had it 5 years.

Pah. True story, last month Mrs a-p MkII managed to pull the washing machine door clean off its hinges. f**k knows how. (Infuriating Partners thread, I know. )  I don’t know what her 4D chess gameplan was but I wasn’t for buying it. 

Found a spares site and a new door for £17 - please bear in mind the hardest thing I do all day (apart from think) is drive a mouse round a desk - and my masculinity was bolstered by swapping the broken for new inside 45 minutes. With just the one cut finger. 

I know, cool story bro…

 

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1 minute ago, alta-pete said:

Pah. True story, last month Mrs a-p MkII managed to pull the washing machine door clean off its hinges. f**k knows how. (Infuriating Partners thread, I know. )  I don’t know what her 4D chess gameplan was but I wasn’t for buying it. 

Found a spares site and a new door for £17 - please bear in mind the hardest thing I do all day (apart from think) is drive a mouse round a desk - and my masculinity was bolstered by swapping the broken for new inside 45 minutes. With just the one cut finger. 

I know, cool story bro…

 

Does she have superhuman strength?

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36 minutes ago, alta-pete said:

Pah. True story, last month Mrs a-p MkII managed to pull the washing machine door clean off its hinges. f**k knows how. (Infuriating Partners thread, I know. )  I don’t know what her 4D chess gameplan was but I wasn’t for buying it. 

Found a spares site and a new door for £17 - please bear in mind the hardest thing I do all day (apart from think) is drive a mouse round a desk - and my masculinity was bolstered by swapping the broken for new inside 45 minutes. With just the one cut finger. 

I know, cool story bro…

 

If there’s no blood then it’s not a proper DIY job. Well done. 

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9 hours ago, Theroadlesstravelled said:

From the Daily Mail in 2015
Most of us consider ourselves to be part of the country’s elite or its middle class, according to a new study


Those London elite dentists up to no good.

Dont have electricians or lorry drivers in England then?

Another Brexit bonus......

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10 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

Plays in an amateur orchestra. Preferably strings (violin for mannies, viola/cello of the wifies).

I would also add in "is a member of the local choir"*

 

*Usually restricted to women of a certain age - my middle class sister who stays in Bath** is in one 😉

**Which is exceptionally middle class.

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20 hours ago, Busta Nut said:

Having a working class person come in as a Cleaner is 100% middle class eh?

Exceptions for the old and infirm where the council or a charity is paying. 

Paying for one yourself so you can go to the gym then starbucks on the other hand. 

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12 hours ago, alta-pete said:

We were discussing our distressing predicament with the neighbour earlier this evening. 

I don’t think she even knows where the hoover is kept. If challenged, I suspect she’d think Pledge & Marigolds was some new chi chi couturier. 

Dyson V11 Advance, shoorely, at Chez a-p ?

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