xbl Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 My relatives took us (me and my brother) for a few days at Haggerston Castle a few years back. Ye gods. Never again. We weren't even of drinking age, and being stereotypically dour Scots, we flat out refused to go to any of those ghastly "kids clubs" or organised activities. Ghastly, ghastly place. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bibby Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Trust me it is.The only (good) reason for going to a holiday park is to avail yourself of the cheap and well equipped mobile home. We have done that frequently over the years and used it as a base to visit other nearby places of interest. The bar / club areas of holiday camps are the closest thing I can imagine to hell on earth. My relatives took us (me and my brother) for a few days at Haggerston Castle a few years back. Ye gods. Never again. We weren't even of drinking age, and being stereotypically dour Scots, we flat out refused to go to any of those ghastly "kids clubs" or organised activities. Ghastly, ghastly place. Eastern Europe it is then. *gulp* 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Eastern Europe is OK, if you just watch your back tbh. There are some stunning burds tbh. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enigma Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Really? Any reason he went there? Marzipan 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Decency Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Eastern Europe is OK, if you just watch your back tbh. There are some stunning burds tbh. I feel much more unsafe in London or Glasgow. 'Eastern' Europe is fine. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam_Wee Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 I feel much more unsafe in London or Glasgow. 'Eastern' Europe is fine. How very dare you! Glasgow is uber safe. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Decency Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 How very dare you! Glasgow is uber safe. My point is that a night out in any UK city is much more dangerous. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xbl Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 I feel much more unsafe in London or Glasgow. 'Eastern' Europe is fine. I got mugged by a prossy and chased by a van through Prague at 4am last time I was there, but regardless, I totally agree with you! -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ad Lib Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 I feel much more unsafe in London or Glasgow. 'Eastern' Europe is fine. I always feel much more vulnerable abroad than anywhere in Britain. Unfamiliarity fuels it as much as anything else. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 We took the wean to one of these places when he was a toddler, Whitley Bay it was. I can honestly say it was the worst holiday experience I've ever had, so bad it easily outstrips 2009's Lanzarote mosquito and sunstroke hell. The park itself was incredibly dingy. It had a real League of Gentlemen feel about it. The staff were simply the surliest, thickest bunch of cretins you could ever imagine. These mouth-breathers were so incompetent and glaikit, they'd have been hired by any major supermarket to work the tills, most probably on a fast track promotion scheme. We are talking '15 year old chip shop worker' standard of surly. The kind that would even scowl at their boyfriends while they were giving them a handjob. There was one bar and one café in the place. The café promised 'cheap food, all day'. I can neither confirm nor deny if the former claim was correct, because the latter claim certainly wasn't, and the fucking place was shut the entire time we were there. Mind you, it was well out of season, what with it being early September. The bar was open however, so all was not lost. A blackboard outside made the ambitious promise: "Family Atmosphere!" It was genuinely the worst, most depressing place on earth that sold alcohol ( and I've been to the West Quarter Club in Falkirk). The talking sovereign ring machine behind the bar was chewing gum with such reckless abandonment it looked as though she may spit it in any direction at any time, and that consequently made her bored 'WOT?' when I approached the bar sound like a very pleased to see me Chewbacca, in a very moany need of hugging. Having finally negotiated the purchase of drinks (astonishingly without the help of Rosetta Stone) we proceeded over to the wobbly folding tables and orange plastic chairs, the soles of our shoes crunching delightfully on the sticky, bloodstained carpet. 'Never mind, the entertainment will be on soon!' the wife said. Yeah, it was, and what entertainment! It was a middle aged man in a vicars outfit and fishnet tights, who sauntered onto the stage, mumbled a few incomprehensible gags in broad Geordie, then did a striptease. This 'family entertainment' was swiftly heading south towards 'Fife family entertainment', so we fucked off back to our caravan. Speaking of the caravans, I was reminded recently of the sheer luxury of them when I saw on the news the sign above Auschwitz had been stolen. I thought it translated as 'Welcome to Whitley Bay Caravan Park'. One fire, with one bar working. One pillow and one blanket on each bed (which were, of course, designed for stunted midgets). A portable telly that didn't work. As for the toilet, I'd have been better pishing in the bushes. Unfortunately the first time I went for a pee was after a few beers, so there was a fair volume to it. Halfway through I began to realise with horror that the actual toilet bowl was the size of a small cooking pot, and was about to overflow. I don't know if any of you have ever tried to stop a mid-beer piss, but it's not funny. As for the shower, I blame myself. I tried to get into it, and that was a mistake. Imagine the contents of a dough machine in a pizza shop just after you've made a fresh batch. Then imagine trying to stuff all of it into a thimble. It's just not going to happen, is it? We lasted two nights, and mercifully decided to leave. When we got to the 'reception', rather than ask us why we were leaving early, the woman just sniffed and shrugged, with the kind of look that said 'I'm surprised you lasted two nights'. I've never been as happy to see a travelodge in my life. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drew Brees Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Chocolate Orange! Why TF would you want chocolate that tastes of oranges? If i wanted to taste oranges i'd buy an orange, but orange flavoured chocolate. c'mon. If i buy or get given chocolate i want it to taste of chocolate, not fuckin oranges. Don't get me wrong, i like an orange filling or centre, but orange flavoured chocolate, f**k off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paco Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Got a driving lesson in half an hour. The roads are snowy and icy, and the sun is perhaps the brightest I've ever seen it. And I haven't had a lesson for three weeks. Could be interesting... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Chocolate Orange!Why TF would you want chocolate that tastes of oranges? If i wanted to taste oranges i'd buy an orange, but orange flavoured chocolate. c'mon. If i buy or get given chocolate i want it to taste of chocolate, not fuckin oranges. Don't get me wrong, i like an orange filling or centre, but orange flavoured chocolate, f**k off. Chocolate oranges are fuckin sensational 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ad Lib Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Got a driving lesson in half an hour. The roads are snowy and icy, and the sun is perhaps the brightest I've ever seen it. And I haven't had a lesson for three weeks.Could be interesting... When I was getting lessons, I had a few cancelled because of the snow (last winter). 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Decency Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 I got mugged by a prossy and chased by a van through Prague at 4am last time I was there, but regardless, I totally agree with you! In what is the red light district, and you were drunk. I would expect trouble in the same place in the same state in Britain. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breaking Decency Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 I always feel much more vulnerable abroad than anywhere in Britain. Unfamiliarity fuels it as much as anything else. Of course, but surely going to, say, Swansea is as unfamilar as going to 'Eastern' Europe? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink Freud Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 We took the wean to one of these places when he was a toddler, Whitley Bay it was. You needn't have typed another sentence....... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 Injury lawyers 4 u advert, with him out The Bill. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 You needn't have typed another sentence....... Quite, but it was cathartic. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paco Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 When I was getting lessons, I had a few cancelled because of the snow (last winter). It's snow bad enough for that here, unfortunately. The main roads are OK, and he phoned me last night to say it'd be on unless it snowed again through the night. Which it didn't. It's just icy as fuck instead. Ah well, what's the worst that could happen... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.