BFTD Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 3 minutes ago, DiegoDiego said: I've worked there before and really enjoyed it. The bureaucracy doesn't quite reach the lowest ring of the ladder and it's pretty relaxed. My boss (good c**t) had a tonne of unnecessary box checking and arse covering to do though. Aye, good luck to you; that was more me having my own axe to grind 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
101 Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 21 minutes ago, Zen Archer Esq. said: There was a guy years ago at work made all sort of claims in his CV, he got the job and was doing quite well until 3 years later he applied for money from the training budget to do an HND, which coincidentally he claimed he had on his CV. Folk got reamed stupid for not checking, he resigned and the checking process was tightened up implemented. How do you back up the claims you make? I have lost all my HNC documentation and can't imagine the college keep that great records. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 Just now, 101 said: How do you back up the claims you make? I have lost all my HNC documentation and can't imagine the college keep that great records. This assumption is bad, even if they didn't, they authorised the mark on behalf of another body which should hold the mark. This isn't like keeping receipts from Tesco, you are obliged to keep records. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 4 minutes ago, 101 said: How do you back up the claims you make? LinkedIn If it's on there and the CV, it can't be wrong. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
101 Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 1 minute ago, Zen Archer Esq. said: This assumption is bad, even if they didn't, they authorised the mark on behalf of another body which should hold the mark. This isn't like keeping receipts from Tesco, you are obliged to keep records. Looking back I should have but i have appalling grades across the board, and doubt they would be much use in securing any employment. Got to hope experience counts for something 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
101 Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 1 minute ago, Hedgecutter said: LinkedIn If it's on there and the CV, it can't be wrong. I'm not the kind of w****r to have LinkedIn, thankfully. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 44 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: People get all hung up on details. Like which school did I go to? How innocent... In Glasgow they ask that to find out your religion, in Edinburgh your social class. Just see Spud's job interview in "Trainspotting" where he'd put down Royal Edinburgh Academy "because there's too much discrimination in this town" I always wondered what impression Glasgow folk had of Aberdeen folk who say they went to the St Machars Academy.. it's non denominational. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 2 minutes ago, tamthebam said: How innocent... In Glasgow they ask that to find out your religion, in Edinburgh your social class. Just see Spud's job interview in "Trainspotting" where he'd put down Royal Edinburgh Academy "because there's too much discrimination in this town" I'm still trying to work out whether this is a clever reply or just an epic whoosh. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 I hope putting down my C in Latin O Grade will get me a better job one day. Pope perhaps? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 1 minute ago, Hedgecutter said: I'm still trying to work out whether this is a clever reply or just an epic whoosh. Epic whoosh probably. I blame my schooling at Mary Erskine's... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 1 minute ago, tamthebam said: I hope putting down my C in Latin O Grade will get me a better job one day. Pope perhaps? Job at Curry's (PC World) where I believe a basic grasp of Latin is essential. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 5 minutes ago, tamthebam said: Epic whoosh probably. I blame my schooling at Mary Erskine's... Hairy what? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 59 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: People get all hung up on details. Like which school did I go to? How many O grades did I get? Could be like six. Could be none. It's not important. 7 minutes ago, tamthebam said: How innocent... Just see Spud's job interview in "Trainspotting" where he'd put down Royal Edinburgh Academy "because there's too much discrimination in this town" 3 minutes ago, tamthebam said: Epic whoosh probably. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 5 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: Job at Curry's (PC World) where I believe a basic grasp of Latin is essential. Mea navis aericumbens anguillis abundant... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 4 minutes ago, Zen Archer Esq. said: Hairy what? The Hairy Rotters are the wans in blue blazers from the school that looks like Hogwarts. Always amusing that the school that has trained generations of Scottish Tories has the motto "Distribute cheerfullie" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 18, 2021 Share Posted March 18, 2021 4 minutes ago, tamthebam said: The Hairy Rotters are the wans in blue blazers from the school that looks like Hogwarts. Always amusing that the school that has trained generations of Scottish Tories has the motto "Distribute cheerfullie" Would have thought that Fettes looks far more like Hogwarts than Heriot's tbh. I'd imagine that the only school fights between those two are fought in teams of 15. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted March 19, 2021 Share Posted March 19, 2021 9 hours ago, DiegoDiego said: See when you're filling in a job application where you need to include all 25 jobs you've ever had, as well as any period of unemployment, is it too disingenuous to put yourself down as "Housekeeper" when you were on the dole? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted March 19, 2021 Share Posted March 19, 2021 (edited) 9 hours ago, tamthebam said: I hope putting down my C in Latin O Grade will get me a better job one day. Pope perhaps? You got a 100 for Latin? Edited March 19, 2021 by Boghead ranter 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted March 19, 2021 Share Posted March 19, 2021 11 hours ago, BFTD said: I don't know what it's like now, but the advice from CV doctors in years gone by was that periods of unemployment are death - always come up with something to fill the gap so you don't have to put 'unemployed', even if it's that you started your own business knitting socks for cats. Suggestions for filling gaps in your CV Fast asleep After attending a party where I probably had too many glasses of wine, I fell fast asleep and woke up nine months later. Although I have no recollection of this, I am now feel wide-awake and fresh as a daisy, ready to do a hard day’s work. Convicted of a crime I did not commit As the result of a clerical error in police criminal records, I was imprisoned for murdering a spouse I haven’t got. After a lengthy appeal I was finally released. While still somewhat bitter about my incarceration, I am now more than ever aware of the importance of keeping information accurate and up to date and the need to locate that information quickly and easily. Comatose After eating a large bowl of goulash, I discovered that I was extremely allergic to paprika by falling into a deep coma. Although normally detrimental to anyone’s health, the doctors used revolutionary techniques of resuscitation that also activated parts of my brain that are normally dormant in most humans. While my extra-sensory perception and telekinetic skills are still rudimentary, I still feel I am more capable than most in the more mundane tasks that one encounters in an office environment. Abducted by aliens While acknowledging that it is highly unusual for this to happen to a non-American, suggesting poor navigational skills on the part of my abductors, I was taken to a planet orbiting Tau Ceti Three, a small yellow dwarf star approximately fifteen light years from Earth. There I was enlightened on Life, the Universe and the role of Planet Earth in the grand scheme of things. Consequently I find mere terrestrial matters such as secretarial and administrative duties to be relatively more straightforward than I had previously believed. Furthermore, as anyone familiar with Einstein’s theory of relativity will know, my sustained periods of travelling at faster than the speed of light mean than I am actually younger and fresher than my years would suggest. Temporary insanity For a brief spell I just lost it totally. I was taken away, placed in a straightjacket and thrown into a padded cell. Now that I am over that, I am now very CALM and collected and able to COPE with the modern STRESSES AND STRAINS of a typical office environment. Furthermore, I feel that my condition, although temporary, means I have a greater understanding and sympathy for colleagues with a similar but more enduring condition. Secret Mission I was recruited by government agents to deal with a matter of grave nation importance. That I am not willing to discuss this sensitive issue at all should be proof that I can be trusted with confidential information. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted March 19, 2021 Share Posted March 19, 2021 10 hours ago, tamthebam said: I hope putting down my C in Latin O Grade will get me a better job one day. Pope perhaps? The kiddie-fiddling might be a problem. I know you haven't done any - that's the point. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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