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Romeo

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For a job interview, I just had to shave off the Gandalf beard that I cultivated during lockdown. My young miss has grown into the habit of furiously kneading it before settling down for a nap on me at some point every day. I'm now getting regular visits to see if it's grown back yet, as she is seriously unamused and throwing me Smudgeresque glares when she finds me still babyfaced.

I'll try and steal a picture of her expression before she finally kills me out of frustration.

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29 minutes ago, BFTD said:

For a job interview, I just had to shave off the Gandalf beard that I cultivated during lockdown. My young miss has grown into the habit of furiously kneading it before settling down for a nap on me at some point every day. I'm now getting regular visits to see if it's grown back yet, as she is seriously unamused and throwing me Smudgeresque glares when she finds me still babyfaced.

I'll try and steal a picture of her expression before she finally kills me out of frustration.

£2.55 from Amazon.

Black Fancy Dress Beard, by J & Emporium, UK Dispatch

Thank you.

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Vets? Took him along for a check up as he wasn't himself. £60 for a five minute examination, had a listen to his heart, then a thermometer up his arse, (he was traumitised by the whole thing and spent hours hiding after it) She suggests blood test, fair enough I think. Get to the till and old biddy says £180.

Turns out he's ok, but FFS.

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3 hours ago, Bigmouth Strikes Again said:

Vets? Took him along for a check up as he wasn't himself. £60 for a five minute examination, had a listen to his heart, then a thermometer up his arse, (he was traumitised by the whole thing and spent hours hiding after it) She suggests blood test, fair enough I think. Get to the till and old biddy says £180.

Turns out he's ok, but FFS.

He'll need to come back with Duke and Ed Sheeran and get mediaeval on their arse!

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4 minutes ago, tamthebam said:

He'll need to come back with Duke and Ed Sheeran and get mediaeval on their arse!

Yeah, maul her on the till, and the other old woman who wandered in, thinking it was the supermarket.

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7 hours ago, Bigmouth Strikes Again said:

Vets? Took him along for a check up as he wasn't himself. £60 for a five minute examination, had a listen to his heart, then a thermometer up his arse, (he was traumitised by the whole thing and spent hours hiding after it) She suggests blood test, fair enough I think. Get to the till and old biddy says £180.

Turns out he's ok, but FFS.

It's an absolute bump this vet carry on. My cat wasn't pissing properly last week, out to the vet for 5 minutes sent on our way with medication and a 75 quid bill but crucially told to get back in touch if he's not pissed properly. 2 days later no improvement so I phone up and I'm told to head back out to check his bladder isn't blocked which it wasn't but we don't know whats causing it. Sent on my way with more medication (human medication which they made me sign a waiver for), an additional 44 quid bill and a 300 quid ultrasound/bloodwork arranged for tomorrow morning. The wee man sank the human medication, pissed a fucking river and is now back to normal, but still need him checked out so I'll be circa 400 quid down by the end of the week. I'd love to know the profits these c***s make.

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14 hours ago, The Moonster said:

It's an absolute bump this vet carry on. My cat wasn't pissing properly last week, out to the vet for 5 minutes sent on our way with medication and a 75 quid bill but crucially told to get back in touch if he's not pissed properly. 2 days later no improvement so I phone up and I'm told to head back out to check his bladder isn't blocked which it wasn't but we don't know whats causing it. Sent on my way with more medication (human medication which they made me sign a waiver for), an additional 44 quid bill and a 300 quid ultrasound/bloodwork arranged for tomorrow morning. The wee man sank the human medication, pissed a fucking river and is now back to normal, but still need him checked out so I'll be circa 400 quid down by the end of the week. I'd love to know the profits these c***s make.

They should have a mask on and a swag bag, heard of someone getting charged £75 for a prescription for Piriton (for a cats itchy skin)

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21 hours ago, Bigmouth Strikes Again said:

Vets? Took him along for a check up as he wasn't himself. £60 for a five minute examination, had a listen to his heart, then a thermometer up his arse, (he was traumitised by the whole thing and spent hours hiding after it) She suggests blood test, fair enough I think. Get to the till and old biddy says £180.

Turns out he's ok, but FFS.

Yup, was the same a couple of months ago when Freyja got her tail caught in the door. £60 consultation fee, £30-odds for 1 injection, £50-odds for the other. All plus VAT of course.

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1 hour ago, Bigmouth Strikes Again said:

Dukemeister permanently moved into my decking area, nice one Duke giving the paw to the selfish cunter next door, that's meant to be looking after you.

dukey.thumb.jpg.f7c9b1e74c5d79f7ba9fed04166e7fc3.jpg

Thank you.

I'd give you two green dots if I could. One for Duke and one for the Mulligan and O'Hare cushion!

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 11/07/2022 at 20:19, Bigmouth Strikes Again said:

Vets? Took him along for a check up as he wasn't himself. £60 for a five minute examination, had a listen to his heart, then a thermometer up his arse, (he was traumitised by the whole thing and spent hours hiding after it) She suggests blood test, fair enough I think. Get to the till and old biddy says £180.

Turns out he's ok, but FFS.

I get a bill like that every month. The pair of them have heart abnormalities, to the point that the vet always acts surprised when I bring them both in for their bimonthly checkups, and the wee shites are on medication and special food for it. The regime has either been working well, or the vet's at it and there's hee-haw wrong with them - neither were supposed to make it to 7, but they're 8 and 10 respectively.

There comes a point every month where I despair about being potless, then I look over and see this  :P

20211209_190016.jpg

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An addendum to the above - one of the little sods just decided to have a huge messy boak all over the upstairs carpet, roughly a foot away from the bathroom with its easy-to-clean flooring. Neither is willing to shop the other for doing it.

They're lucky I love them.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Top tip for keeping your mog cool in the heatwave, Webbox lick-e-lix, bang them in the freezer, and you've got a fish flavoured ice lolly. Absolutely vile, but the Smudger and the Dukemeister fucking love them.

webbox.jpg.11203672bd32e1b7bdfcacf450d61e6a.jpg

Thank you.

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