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Idiotic mis-interpretations of sayings.


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Not so much a saying but a place in this example - worked in an insurance office and one of the older women took a call for travel insurance - she took down all the details before passing it across for me to work out the price. Apparently the customer was going to "the Lands of Rotty".

I used to do admin work in a medical practice while I was at uni, and I was going through a patient's notes for some reason or another. One of the nurses had to give this patient vaccinations for his travel to South America, and had noted that he was visiting "Veniswheeler".

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Where the hell are all these oddities who say "pacifically" when they mean "specifically"? In over two decades on this earth I have never heard someone say this outside of a sitcom.

They walk among us. I met my one and only a while back, and was amazed by how quickly I wanted to grab her by the throat.

I wonder if it wasn't some mild speech impediment that caused a few folk to miss out the opening 's', only for it to have been adopted by people who've no idea what the noises coming out of their mouths mean.

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My boss today (the one who put me on a disciplinary for taking the piss out of his spelling)

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He wants you to think of him naked.

Combined with the recent disciplinary, you've got a cracking case for sexual harassment there.

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Have hummed and hawed about dropping myself in it but...back in the day...when youngsters were wearing Grolsch bottle tops as an accessory to enhance their footwear and I was embarking on my career in drinking...as a fresh faced 18 year old, in the very dark night clubs of Dundee, I was very impressed by my older pals ordering the latest designer beer..."Bex-byder-nek"

Genuinely had no idea it was just Becks and "by the neck" meant no glass! What a fud! Oh to be that young and naive again!

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Have hummed and hawed about dropping myself in it but...back in the day...when youngsters were wearing Grolsch bottle tops as an accessory to enhance their footwear and I was embarking on my career in drinking...as a fresh faced 18 year old, in the very dark night clubs of Dundee, I was very impressed by my older pals ordering the latest designer beer..."Bex-byder-nek"

Genuinely had no idea it was just Becks and "by the neck" meant no glass! What a fud! Oh to be that young and naive again!

To be fair, who the hell says "by the neck" when ordering a bottled beer? Only someone trying to make a really mundane act into something a little bit cool and mysterious. A fud, in other words.

He was ordering a cheap lager in Dundee, not specifying which particular twist on a martini or manhattan he wanted in Harry's Bar, ffs.

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People who refer to two slices of bread with a filling in the middle as a Samwich. Utter scum.

Where do you stand on sangwidge?

Both irritating. As is "sanger" and "sarnie".

Usually said by idiots in a workplace trying to give out some quasi-jovial "we're all in this together" type drivel when lunchtime comes around. A guy I used to work with would always ask me what I had for my "nosebag" when lunchtime approached, before telling me what kind of sarnie he'd put together that day.

To be fair to the clown, considering the quality of his work, making said sandwich probably was the greatest achievement on most of his days, so perhaps he was justifiably proud of the effort.

I, being the joy to work with that I am, would just growl something in response and hope he'd go away.

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