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Night out cancellation excuses


sjc

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Anyone else ever had one of those sperm count tests? They apparently only give you one of two results: "Abnormal" (or something similar), or "Reasonably Normal".

Reasonably fucking normal? Thanks for that, mate. Talk about damning with faint praise.

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I'm starting to think that the guy was slagging your virility and you just mistakenly thought he was calling you a drunk.



No - he started laughing at something I said and said "you are what we would call a Jaffa" then said "jaffa cake - jakey alcoholic b*****d" he said it tongue in cheek obviously as I am far more erudite than him.
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1 minute ago, throbber said:

No - he started laughing at something I said and said "you are what we would call a Jaffa" then said "jaffa cake - jakey alcoholic b*****d" he said it tongue in cheek obviously as I am far more erudite than him.

 

Maybe just implying you've killed your swimmers with all of the ethanol?

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1 minute ago, throbber said:

There was nothing insinuated about my sperm count ffs!

You should just ask him, really. I doubt he'll get the impression that you're sensitive about the issue and cruelly exploit it in future interactions.

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1 minute ago, throbber said:

I went and doubled checked with him today what the word was again and what it meant!

Well, that's all sorted, then. The state of your tadpoles will surely never be impugned on P&B again. Top banana.

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30 minutes ago, throbber said:

Back on topic - has anyone ever used a low sperm count to get out of a night out?

Not quite, but I'm pretty sure I've used the phrase "I've spunked all my cash on fast women / slow horses" and not been able to go out. 

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