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What massively low bars do you aspire to?


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People wanting DIY skills are fucking insane. I couldn't hammer a nail into a dumpling. Everybody knows that and don't ask me to do anything.

Get a man in, eg a painter. I could do that but painting is boring and would take me a week. Get a man in and he'll have it done in a day while I pursue my interests elsewhere.

Edited by Sergeant Wilson
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17 hours ago, throbber said:

I think DA needs a bit of stoic philosophy in his life - all of this self loathing and lamenting past mistakes would have Marcus Aurelius turning in his grave.

I can't be the only one on P&B who's sick to the back teeth with your constant references to post-Socratic ancient philosophy.

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11 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

People wanting DIY skills are fucking insane. I couldn't hammer a nail into a dumpling. Everybody knows that and don't ask me to do anything.

Get a man in, eg a painter. I could do that but painting is boring and would take me a week. Get a man in and he'll have it done in a day while I pursue my interests elsewhere.

Nah, I actually like doing DIY projects as long as I'm up to the task and don't have a deadline hanging over me.  We moved into a new place and after  a couple of years the beige walls were getting on all of our t**s so we decided to paint the whole place top to bottom.  It took the best part of 6 months but wasn't the chore it could be.   I've also added moulding throughout as well as other bits 'n' pieces.

On the other hand, last week we needed to change a tap in the kitchen sink - a 10-minute job but I hate plumbing work so I got the local handyman to fix it - literally a 5-minute job for him.  And it only cost a fiver as labour is cheap here.

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6 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

Be able to change a lightbulb with confidence.

That's quite tragically not even a joke. 🙁

 

Eta: I'd be willing to attend basic DIY courses as I feel utterly useless about the house.  I grew up in a single parent household and was never shown how to perform basic DIY such as work a drill.  My complete reliance on GSI is a source of deep shame.

I would also add the driving thing, but deep in my heart it's not something that I personally aspire to do.  More something that I'd do just to get folk off my back.

Much as you can use the net to find locations quite easily, YouTube videos showing basic DIY tasks are common place and handy, but you do need to find a brand/poster you feel confident about for best use. For instance, bought a 2010 Corolla for the kiddo’s school car, and found a Greek gent who has videos on damn near every task I’ve needed on the car. Just quiet music, no talking, shows how to remove the bumper, change the headlight, and reinstall…easy peasy…it’s made working on the car a complete doddle. In much the same way, most stuff around the house can be addressed, and watching the video quickly makes it clear if you should just hire someone because you know your own comfort level.

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Yikes. Absolute minter for me last week. Big apologies to all for my nonsense.

Been lying low since due to utter embarrassment. Not that some of what I said isn't true, but the mewling way I relayed it was really poor. 

I've done this sort of shit so many times over the years so I can't promise it won't happen again, even though I hope it won't, but I will strive to not have it happen again.

In a way it was good to get out of my system, although it was also one of the worst ways to do it.

 

P.S. I also can't drive. Could never afford to when I was younger and parents couldn't pay for me. Got in to debt quite quick when I went to uni at 17 (silly story) and spent a while paying that off. Back to uni a few years later and so poor. More debt. No qualifications sadly.

Had a wee period of getting involved with pay day loans (think in the end it was 95) so lots of cash went to that. Thankfully not had any in a few years. Not even applied for any in years. Sadly no savings as I'm so bad with money. Credit rating in bits.

I'm rambling again. So I'll pipe down and reiterate my apologies.

Edited by DA Baracus
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3 hours ago, DA Baracus said:

Yikes. Absolute minter for me last week. Big apologies to all for my nonsense.

Been lying low since due to utter embarrassment. Not that some of what I said isn't true, but the mewling way I relayed it was really poor. 

I've done this sort of shit so many times over the years so I can't promise it won't happen again, even though I hope it won't, but I will strive to not have it happen again.

In a way it was good to get out of my system, although it was also one of the worst ways to do it.

 

P.S. I also can't drive. Could never afford to when I was younger and parents could pay for me. Got in tk debt quite quick when I went to uni at 17 (silly story) and spent a while paying that off. Back to uni a few years later and so poor. More debt. No qualifications sadly.

Had a wee period of getting involved with pay day loans (think in the end it was 95) so lots of cash went to that. Thankfully not had any in a few years. Not even applied for any in years. Sadly no saving as I'm so bad with money. Credit rating in bits.

I'm rambling again. So I'll pipe down and reiterate my apologies.

Apologies unnecessary, we all have THOSE days, but too many are unwilling to admit it. You actually sparked a mildly productive, and quite entertaining, wee thread.

As for no savings because you’re “bad with money”, it’s never too late to learn a bit. The amount of money I pissed away on stupid things and frivolous wants is depressing to consider, and would have been quite useful now. However, I found that all that experience made it possible for me to organize myself right now so as to made do on a lot less than I would have expected. Everyone talks about “budgeting” and that crap, but I’ve found that simply knowing what I’ve charged or debited on a rolling basis has made me much more deliberate on spending, and significantly reduced my expenses. The old saw about “paying yourself first” by putting a small amount into savings automatically from a check before you start spending is a good one too…it’s never too late to establish a little savings cushion.

Ramble whenever, it’s what the place is built for, it’s not Mumsnet.

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I don't even make £30k a year (the £150 a month on student loans was nonsense; no idea where I got that from).

Sadly I owe circa £30k in student loans with absolutely nothing to show for it. I had to subsidise that with overdrafts that I've thankfully paid off.

In my last ever year as a student I took out my first ever payday loan. Thankfully it was my last as a student, but sadly wasn't my last ever.

Talking of university, I used to think I was a fairly bright guy (nothing special, just not bad) but my experiences make me think otherwise. 

I'm shockingly bad at study skills. I struggle massively to take in and recall information. I tried to take notes in lectures but quickly got lost and often got drowsy and fell asleep.

My attempt at revision were the 'brute force' method, meaning I read stuff over and over and tried to remember it. Didn't work.

I was so bad in exams too. Failed a year 1 chemistry exam 6 times (including when I was in year 3 of course). I think I might actually be a bit of an idiot.

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10 hours ago, DA Baracus said:

I don't even make £30k a year (the £150 a month on student loans was nonsense; no idea where I got that from).

Sadly I owe circa £30k in student loans with absolutely nothing to show for it. I had to subsidise that with overdrafts that I've thankfully paid off.

In my last ever year as a student I took out my first ever payday loan. Thankfully it was my last as a student, but sadly wasn't my last ever.

Talking of university, I used to think I was a fairly bright guy (nothing special, just not bad) but my experiences make me think otherwise. 

I'm shockingly bad at study skills. I struggle massively to take in and recall information. I tried to take notes in lectures but quickly got lost and often got drowsy and fell asleep.

My attempt at revision were the 'brute force' method, meaning I read stuff over and over and tried to remember it. Didn't work.

I was so bad in exams too. Failed a year 1 chemistry exam 6 times (including when I was in year 3 of course). I think I might actually be a bit of an idiot.

I also dropped out/was kicked out of uni. I’ve failed a fair few exams as well. I wouldn’t say that that, in itself, would mean that you’re not bright. There’s a lot of different ways to be intelligent, and people’s minds work in lots of ways - some of which simply aren’t suited to that style of learning or examination. 

I’d also say that being accepted for uni, regardless of how it turned out, is an achievement that you should be proud of. 

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10 hours ago, DA Baracus said:

I don't even make £30k a year (the £150 a month on student loans was nonsense; no idea where I got that from).

Sadly I owe circa £30k in student loans with absolutely nothing to show for it. I had to subsidise that with overdrafts that I've thankfully paid off.

In my last ever year as a student I took out my first ever payday loan. Thankfully it was my last as a student, but sadly wasn't my last ever.

Talking of university, I used to think I was a fairly bright guy (nothing special, just not bad) but my experiences make me think otherwise

I'm shockingly bad at study skills. I struggle massively to take in and recall information. I tried to take notes in lectures but quickly got lost and often got drowsy and fell asleep.

My attempt at revision were the 'brute force' method, meaning I read stuff over and over and tried to remember it. Didn't work.

I was so bad in exams too. Failed a year 1 chemistry exam 6 times (including when I was in year 3 of course). I think I might actually be a bit of an idiot.

See? You're wiser already 😇.

As TxRover said, you sparked a fun and productive thread. You've created a story that you're all bad and utterly useless, which is one you created because it used to serve you, but seems to be causing you pain now. Take a wee step out of that and have a look back at the thread and look at the fun wee connections and greenie-heavy posts and allow yourself, just for a moment, to take some credit for that. 

You reached out (ken, but I like the phrase) in a drunken depressed state and it wasn't an accident mate. The drink made you throw your armour off for a bit to an extent to which you aren't accustomed and the anxiety you feel now is those lifelong protective mechanisms springing into action to prevent whatever you deeply fear will happen if people actually reach out in return.

A sure sign that you have no intention of changing, or have no intention of having anyone connect with you over this would be if you just deleted the thread. That would also be the easiest thing to do.

It is to your massive credit that you didn't do that. 

I've mentioned it before, but I'd invite you to have a look at attachment adaptations/attachment styles. I think that a lot of our recurring patterns are down to things that happen in our childhood and we then create behaviours to protect ourselves, but which then become maladaptive in adulthood. The inability to concentrate at Uni sounds like an overactive or hypervigilant limbic system, where the mind is too busy scanning for threat to focus on higher pursuits such as learning chemistry. 

I won't keep battering at that door though. I think you've learned already that a bunch of anonymous c***s on a football forum are here for you. Thanks for starting the thread.

 

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11 hours ago, DA Baracus said:

I'm shockingly bad at study skills. I struggle massively to take in and recall information. I tried to take notes in lectures but quickly got lost and often got drowsy and fell asleep.

My attempt at revision were the 'brute force' method, meaning I read stuff over and over and tried to remember it. Didn't work.

I was so bad in exams too. Failed a year 1 chemistry exam 6 times (including when I was in year 3 of course). I think I might actually be a bit of an idiot.

 

You've just written something I said to my support lecturer at Uni. It led to her sending me to be checked for dyslexia which I was diagnosed with. I always thought dyslexia was letters being jumbled up but it's far more complex than that and it explained a lot for me. Like you I thought I was just a bit of an idiot at school when everyone else had finished their work and I was always the last one to finish mine. 

I don't know how you'd go about getting tested for it (perhaps through your GP?) and I don't know if a diagnosis would do you any good but it would at least make you stop beating yourself up and not thinking you're stupid (that was certainly the biggest benefit the diagnosis did me). 

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1 hour ago, 19QOS19 said:

 

You've just written something I said to my support lecturer at Uni. It led to her sending me to be checked for dyslexia which I was diagnosed with. I always thought dyslexia was letters being jumbled up but it's far more complex than that and it explained a lot for me. Like you I thought I was just a bit of an idiot at school when everyone else had finished their work and I was always the last one to finish mine. 

I don't know how you'd go about getting tested for it (perhaps through your GP?) and I don't know if a diagnosis would do you any good but it would at least make you stop beating yourself up and not thinking you're stupid (that was certainly the biggest benefit the diagnosis did me). 

Risky strategy IMO.

DA:  “Doc, is it dyslexia?”

Doc:  “No, you’re just a bit of an idiot.”

 

 

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@DA Baracus yer a fucking idiot like me. 

That does mean your fucked.

Well that would be bonus..

What am saying yer not on yer own, you're a loser like 99% society.  

PM me for life changing memories.

I now live in a wooded shack, with 3 kids and a wild wife.. 

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