What massively low bars do you aspire to?

[velo army]

3 hours ago, oneteaminglasgow said:

I’d like to be able to drive a car.

I have a licence, and when I was getting lessons it was fine-ish but ever since passing my test I am absolutely terrified by the prospect of driving. I’ve done it a handful of times in the 6 years since I passed and I’ve ended up drenched in sweat every time from panicking.

At the minute, I have no need to drive so it’s fine but I’m hoping to have a family one day and I’d like to be able to at least do short trips or do it in an emergency then. 

^^^ subway loyal

[Venti]

@DA Baracus I don't think most of your points are unachievable.

Dwelling on the things that may have slipped past you is a distraction of focussing on the things that are still within your grasp.

[Bairnardo]

19 minutes ago, Venti said:

@DA Baracus I don't think most of your points are unachievable.

Dwelling on the things that may have slipped past you is a distraction of focussing on the things that are still within your grasp.

Not to get all armchair psychology ish, but I agree with you. A lot of them are things that just sort of happen and can't really be forced, but they while they can't be forced, they absolutely can be prevented if you constantly make sure you get in the way of letting them happen. 

As others have said, if you are an all round decent person who tries to go through life trying not to be a twat, then at the very least you need to remember just to be a bit kinder to yourself. 

[oldbitterandgrumpy]

22 minutes ago, Venti said:

@DA Baracus I don't think most of your points are unachievable.

Dwelling on the things that may have slipped past you is a distraction of focussing on the things that are still within your grasp.

That’s exactly what Mrs Grumpy patiently reminds me off every so often. Good advice. 

[Venti]

2 minutes ago, Bairnardo said:

Not to get all armchair psychology ish, but I agree with you. A lot of them are things that just sort of happen and can't really be forced, but they while they can't be forced, they absolutely can be prevented if you constantly make sure you get in the way of letting them happen. 

As others have said, if you are an all round decent person who tries to go through life trying not to be a twat, then at the very least you need to remember just to be a bit kinder to yourself. 

Always imagine you as Ronnie Corbett on an armchair.

[Bairnardo]

1 minute ago, Venti said:

Always imagine you as Ronnie Corbett on an armchair.

 

[throbber]

1 hour ago, Venti said:

@DA Baracus I don't think most of your points are unachievable.

Dwelling on the things that may have slipped past you is a distraction of focussing on the things that are still within your grasp.

I think DA needs a bit of stoic philosophy in his life - all of this self loathing and lamenting past mistakes would have Marcus Aurelius turning in his grave.

[Molotov]

20 hours ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

A fellow Dee, no less @Sugar_Army

I hope he said “thank you” to whoever found it for him.

[bobbykdy]

6 hours ago, oneteaminglasgow said:

I’d like to be able to drive a car.

I have a licence, and when I was getting lessons it was fine-ish but ever since passing my test I am absolutely terrified by the prospect of driving. I’ve done it a handful of times in the 6 years since I passed and I’ve ended up drenched in sweat every time from panicking.

At the minute, I have no need to drive so it’s fine but I’m hoping to have a family one day and I’d like to be able to at least do short trips or do it in an emergency then. 

I am sure there is a thing called pass plus and such like for those who already have a licence. I think doing a course like that would not only give you more confidence but I think it used to (not sure if it still does) get you a reduced price on your car insurance.

[greendot]

https://www.youtube.com/@BetterThanYesterday

 

I'll leave this here for you @DA Baracus and suggest starting with the 'Health' playlist.  The guy who does this channel has clearly done his research over a lot of the 'self help' and 'productivity and lifestyle' type books (I'd also recommend the book Atomic Habits by James Clear) but they've compressed them into some easy to digest 10 - 30 minute videos.  I've watched a number of the videos and they're very relatable and easy to understand and to be frank, I found myself wondering why on earth was i spending my time being so hard on myself (kenneth.jpg) instead of embracing the good things in my life / job etc.

 

Worth a watch at the very least!

[welshbairn]

7 hours ago, oneteaminglasgow said:

I’d like to be able to drive a car.

I have a licence, and when I was getting lessons it was fine-ish but ever since passing my test I am absolutely terrified by the prospect of driving. I’ve done it a handful of times in the 6 years since I passed and I’ve ended up drenched in sweat every time from panicking.

At the minute, I have no need to drive so it’s fine but I’m hoping to have a family one day and I’d like to be able to at least do short trips or do it in an emergency then. 

I hated the whole learning to drive experience, took me 3 or 4 times to pass and was still very nervous for months after, especially at night and on motorways as they were never part of lessons (night driving became easier when I found out I'd been driving on sidelights rather than dipped/full!). But after a while you stop thinking and worrying about the process, get some good music on and enjoy the freedom of going wherever you want whenever you want. Doesn't take long before you're driving on automatic and you have to remind yourself to keep some of the concentration on. I'd suggest a road trip on your own over a weekend sometime, with no rush about getting anywhere or feeling self conscious about your driving. If you shop around it needn't cost too much to rent a car, it can be cheaper to rent a small van. Another option would be to try an automatic, less to think about when you're getting used to it. 

[Bigmouth Strikes Again]

Forget about the driving, it's an absolute stress filled shitemare, roads are clogged with morons in giant SUV's, who basically can't drive them, or pay for them.

Thank you.

[Thane of Cawdor]

On 15/10/2023 at 18:29, velo army said:

As a grammar pedant you should aim to refrain from ending your thread title with a preposition .

There isn't such a thing as an objectively low bar. Some people with secure attachment styles find relationships a dawdle. 

 

 

I am also a pedant and think you have confused 'dawdle' with 'doddle'.

[HoBNob]

Some absolutely tremendous posts, PnB is occasionally funny, sometimes funny, however it's threads like this or the parenting/depression ones that show the best of some c***s, lovely. 

[velo army]

8 hours ago, Thane of Cawdor said:

I am also a pedant and think you have confused 'dawdle' with 'doddle'.

This pissed me off as I always thought that "doddle" was a corruption of "dawdle". Having just checked the etymology it makes even more sense for it to be dawdle, but by the letter of the law you are of course correct. 

Head's gone thread for me now.

[Richey Edwards]

19 hours ago, oneteaminglasgow said:

I’d like to be able to drive a car.

I have a licence, and when I was getting lessons it was fine-ish but ever since passing my test I am absolutely terrified by the prospect of driving. I’ve done it a handful of times in the 6 years since I passed and I’ve ended up drenched in sweat every time from panicking.

At the minute, I have no need to drive so it’s fine but I’m hoping to have a family one day and I’d like to be able to at least do short trips or do it in an emergency then. 

Mate I was terrified of driving by myself when I passed my test. It's one of those things that get easier the more that you do it.

I still sometimes get anxious, but nowhere near as bad as when I first passed my test.

 

[hk blues]

21 hours ago, oneteaminglasgow said:

I’d like to be able to drive a car.

I have a licence, and when I was getting lessons it was fine-ish but ever since passing my test I am absolutely terrified by the prospect of driving. I’ve done it a handful of times in the 6 years since I passed and I’ve ended up drenched in sweat every time from panicking.

At the minute, I have no need to drive so it’s fine but I’m hoping to have a family one day and I’d like to be able to at least do short trips or do it in an emergency then. 

I was a late starter - I learned as a teenager but gave up as I had zero interest or need to drive.  Eventually, at age 30 we moved South so I had no choice bit to pick it up again.  Took lessons and passed 1st time 2nd time around and then drove a lot every day for 9 or 10 years.  Moved abroad and driving was more of a disadvantage than anything so didn't drive for the next 10 years.  Move again and didn't fancy driving so didn't bother for the next 8 years.  Finally gave in to the wife and son's moaning so bought a car for her 3 months ago - she's driven it once.  And, to be fair, I can understand as it's really mental here.  I chose an automatic despite my reservations and cannot find any negative with it - you can focus on what's going on around you instead of fumbling with changing gears etc.  Sure, it's a bit pricier at the outset but well worth it IMO if you're not the most confident driver. 

tl;dr  - get an automatic and take it easy at first, a wee bit every day or so and slowly ramp it up until you're more comfortable. 

[itzdrk]

• To finish decorating my flat or accrue the money so that someone else may do it for me. 
• To do a small DIY project (I'm talking putting up shelves and the like) that isn't only a qualified success.  

 

[Hedgecutter]

Be able to change a lightbulb with confidence.

That's quite tragically not even a joke.

 

Eta: I'd be willing to attend basic DIY courses as I feel utterly useless about the house.  I grew up in a single parent household and was never shown how to perform basic DIY such as work a drill.  My complete reliance on GSI is a source of deep shame.

I would also add the driving thing, but deep in my heart it's not something that I personally aspire to do.  More something that I'd do just to get folk off my back.

Edited October 17, 2023 by Hedgecutter

['WellDel]

Re: the driving posts. It's a thing that people either enjoy, or do out of necessity. I had my first lesson on the day of my 17th birthday and passed my test while still at school. Been driving now for over 30 years and making a living from driving various types of vehicles for the past 20. It's something I actually enjoy whereas my wife, although she is a good enough driver, hates it and sees it purely as a function she needs to do.

The increase in the number of drivers and the sheer volume of vehicles on the road over time has obviously seen the number of complete morons rise too, and I can see how folk who are newly qualified, or getting back behind the wheel after a period away might be wary or apprehensive on the roads as they are today. I'd suggest getting out and about in area you will be driving most in the evenings when it's much quieter, to get used to handling the car and maybe having a go at tackling any junctions or interchanges you have concerns over, which will help build your confidence for when you need to navigate them at busier times.