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It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you


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I was in the pub and I needed a piss
I went to the toilet so I could do this
But someone had stuffed some bog
Roll in the urinal
And someone else’d had a piss there
And it was all full

So I thought to myself
That’s no problem at all
I’ll just relieve myself in the cubicle
Luckily there was no one in
There doing a shite
But when I opened the door
I saw a terrible sight

Come on mate, I only wanted a slash
But the bloke before me left bangers and mash

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Some balls are held for charity
And some for fancy dress
But when they're held for pleasure
They're the balls that I like best
My balls are always bouncing
To the left and to the right
It's my belief that my big balls
Should be held every night (oh)

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Maybe I'm a weirdo, train wreck, nightmare
Heartbreak posterchild, pick me up from daycare
I done shit I wish I could take back
Man I said I'd never do that but I did once and the truth is
Not a bad guy but the shoe fits
And if I had a dollar every time I do this
Then I'd be rich and I'm stupid
I'm a dumb bitch and I blew it and I don't even gotta wonder why
Guess who's lonely and pathetic, lonely and pathetic, lonely and pathetic again
Yeah. There. I fucking said it. Lonely and pathetic. Lonely and pathetic again
Sitting in my room, high, hating everyone. I don't even care like la di da di da
Guess who's lonely and pathetic, lonely and pathetic, lonely and pathetic again

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