Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...

[tamthebam]

6 hours ago, Raidernation said:

When people at work ask me the inevitable “how are you?” I always say “fantastic!” In a very confident loud manner and keep going.

Common here is “What’s up?” to which I have a selection of annoying pedantic answers such as:
Point up
“The ceiling”
“The sun”
“The opposite of down”
And many more.







I’m an annoying chunt

People ask "how long are you going to be?"

To which I reply "about 6 feet"

Sometimes physical violence ensues...

[GordonD]

"Are you all right?"

"No, half of me is left."

[Torpar]

After 6 years in Canada my automatic greeting now is "hey, how are you?" Even though I have zero interest in how the check out person is doing, zero. 99.9% of the time the answer is always "Good, how are you?"

I miss the days the simpler days of "awright mate" 

[welshbairn]

6 minutes ago, Torpar said:

After 6 years in Canada my automatic greeting now is "hey, how are you?" Even though I have zero interest in how the check out person is doing, zero. 99.9% of the time the answer is always "Good, how are you?"

I miss the days the simpler days of "awright mate" 

Have started doing this yet..............................................................................................................................................eh?

[19QOS19]

After 6 years in Canada my automatic greeting now is "hey, how are you?" Even though I have zero interest in how the check out person is doing, zero. 99.9% of the time the answer is always "Good, how are you?"
I miss the days the simpler days of "awright mate" 

A. Y'awright pal.

B. Aye, yersel?

A. No bad pal.

That tends to be my passing conversation. Either Person A or B.

[Torpar]

15 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

Have started doing this yet..............................................................................................................................................eh?

Of course, I'm also in the habit of calling everyone buddy, I think it's important for immigrants to assimilate. 

6 minutes ago, 19QOS19 said:

A. Y'awright pal.

B. Aye, yersel?

A. No bad pal.

That tends to be my passing conversation. Either Person A or B.

I remember those days fondly. Occasionally I'll throw out the odd ça va? To an older lady that lives in our building and then hope my fourth year French was enough to continue some banalités 

On a slightly related topic, I remember speaking to my second cousin from near Dumfries once, asking how he was and him answered "my heid hurts, I was gassed last night" Took me a while to figure out what he meant. 

[The Moonster]

I don't usually mind small talk over hello/how are you? but there is a firey rage burning inside of me every time someone opens conversation with "Awright, ye winnin'?". You're not Charlie Sheen m8, and even if you were it's fucking shite patter.

[19QOS19]

I remember those days fondly. Occasionally I'll throw out the odd ça va? To an older lady that lives in our building and then hope my fourth year French was enough to continue some banalités 
On a slightly related topic, I remember speaking to my second cousin from near Dumfries once, asking how he was and him answered "my heid hurts, I was gassed last night" Took me a while to figure out what he meant. 

I get a fair bit of abuse from my Weegie/Ayrshire training colleagues for using the word "gan". Had no idea it wasn't used across the country.

[buchan30]

On 07/06/2020 at 21:48, DA Baracus said:

Also I just dropped a toilet roll down the toilet.

Raging.

You should have panic bought like the rest of us. 

On 09/06/2020 at 07:32, Gaz FFC said:

Gonnae do a ton of drugs this weekend and cannot wait to get baw deep in a prostitute?

Not until they do away with social distancing obviously.

 

[welshbairn]

On 07/06/2020 at 21:48, DA Baracus said:

Also I just dropped a toilet roll down the toilet.

Raging.

 

On 07/06/2020 at 21:49, Mr. Alli said:

@welshbairn

Bit slow to the alert there, got 50 Chinese ones going cheap. Still in the wrapper, unused.

Edited June 10, 2020 by welshbairn

[HeartsOfficialMoaner]

Chai-na, Chayna, Chaiynah.

Trump. The way he says China. The way he moves his hands.

Chaiy nah. 

 

[D.A.F.C]

[GordonD]

15 hours ago, welshbairn said:

 

Bit slow to the alert there, got 50 Chinese ones going cheap. Still in the wrapper, unused.

Do the perforations go sideways?

[Derry Alli]

Oh dear. 

[NJ2]

Do the perforations go sideways?

No, it’s just from China. Why would they go sideways?

[KnightswoodBear]

Whilst responding to a DM on twitter to Virgin Atlantic with a snarky message because they are robbing c***s, I somehow managed to attach an emoji of a sloth drinking coffee.  And I can't delete it.

[GordonD]

29 minutes ago, NJ2 said:

No, it’s just from China. Why would they go sideways?

It was a joke based on a racist belief about the anatomy of Chinese women. 

[NJ2]

It was a joke based on a racist belief about the anatomy of Chinese women. 

Maybe racist jokes are best left in the past mate

[Shandon Par]

34 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

Whilst responding to a DM on twitter to Virgin Atlantic with a snarky message because they are robbing c***s, I somehow managed to attach an emoji of a sloth drinking coffee.  And I can't delete it.

My daughter said on Facebook yesterday, her friend's aunt posted a pic of the friend and her recently departed-from-this-earth grandpa. She meant to post a sympathetic reply but later noticed she had accidentally posted a crying with laughter emoji in response.

Edited June 11, 2020 by Shandon Par

[BFTD]

18 hours ago, HeartsOfficialMoaner said:

Chai-na, Chayna, Chaiynah.

Trump. The way he says China. The way he moves his hands.

Chaiy nah. 

It's "Jynah", is it not?

Is it a bit of a Boston - sorry, Bauwstun - inflection creeping in, or is he just a c**t?