Things you want to share with P&B

[Bobby Skidmarks]

52 minutes ago, Grim O'Grady said:

I went for a tattoo today & I never cried.

Grimbo

  Reveal hidden contents

the tattooist was off sick, so never got it done

 

[Miguel Sanchez]

54 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:

Didn't even scuff the loafers.

More evidence in Shandon's P&B serial killer logs. I bet if you pull that shelf out of the fridge you'll see the torn sleeves of a blood-stained blue jumper.

[Rugster]

Just now, Miguel Sanchez said:

More evidence in Shandon's P&B serial killer logs. I bet if you pull that shelf out of the fridge you'll see the torn sleeves of a blood-stained blue jumper.

Given the state of it more chance of mouldy food. It's fucking bogging!

[Hedgecutter]

This may be worth a thread in itself, but this is an excellent read: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-tayside-central-37340312

Never change, Angus.

Happened in Montrose right enough, but the pedant in me wishes to say that the couple, albeit being pretty local, are from St Cyrus in Aberdeenshire. So there.

[Sergeant Wilson]

36 minutes ago, Rugster said:

Given the state of it more chance of mouldy food. It's fucking bogging!

As is the floor, wellies rather than loafers needed.

[Shandon Par]

1 hour ago, Rugster said:

Given the state of it more chance of mouldy food. It's fucking bogging!

It had been rented - was minging. Piles of mouse shit behind the fridge. 

 

Eta I mean I'd rented the house out to folk, I hadn't rented the fridge. 

Edited September 13, 2016 by Shandon Par

[supermik]

Hmm. Are the Russkies making mischief or is there something more to this?

https://sputniknews.com/sport/20160913/1045262599/wada-williams-banned-substances.html

[Aidan]

Happened in Montrose right enough, but the pedant in me wishes to say that the couple, albeit being pretty local, are from St Cyrus in Aberdeenshire. So there.

He is actually from Dundee, and was once a contestant on the weakest link. Absolute w****r of a bloke too.

[Njord]

4 hours ago, Shandon Par said:

Not sure if there's a P&B Manly Activities thread? 

Been having a manly day today. Did some running sprints, fitted an integrated fridge freezer and ripped out the old one using mainly a claw hammer, did some chin ups, went to the rubbish dump, had some rumpy pumpy on a rug (with a real woman), went to Howdens. Any P&B'ers able to out-man me? 

There was one, possibly lost in the cull.

[SlipperyP]

Not sure if there's a P&B Manly Activities thread? 

Been having a manly day today. Did some running sprints, fitted an integrated fridge freezer and ripped out the old one using mainly a claw hammer, did some chin ups, went to the rubbish dump, had some rumpy pumpy on a rug (with a real woman), went to Howdens. Any P&B'ers able to out-man me? 

Growled at a few dogs. They shat it, will keep on trying.

Thinking of jumping in the river to get that 2m monotor lizard that keeps looking at me.

[SlipperyP]

Lucky it's chained up

[throbber]

There's not much meat on that thing Slippery P.

[SlipperyP]

There's not much meat on that thing Slippery P.

I don't eat them. Only fight.
Plenty rice in house thanks Thobs.

[endieinreekie]

Saw a guy walking along Princes Street this morning with a Queen's Park shirt on. At first I thought it was a bit strange but then thought, fair play, it's not one of the bigot brothers, Man City or Chelsea. Respect.

[Shandon Par]

I think Slippery could earn a few quid here as an international dog consultant. He could be judge, jury and if needs be, executioner.

Ceaser the NYC serial killing pitbull - should he live, or should he die? 

http://nypost.com/2016/08/02/killer-pit-bulls-owners-want-due-process-before-hes-put-down/ 

[throbber]

Currently at a resort not too far from Barcelona killing a few days after my city break and i must say that I find the behaviour of British tourists has been quite good despite a plethora of old firm/ Liverpool tops on display. There is however one woman who I have taken an intense disliking to. I disliked her immediately before I even saw her in fact, as I was reading through "The Damage Done" by James Oswald (good book by the way) I overheard this odious 45 ish year old Glasgweigan half wit openly complaining to strangers that the sun wasn't shining on her sun bed properly as there was a building in the way and this wouldn't have happened at the resort she stayed in last year. I then heard her say that her and her husband were big Celtic fans and wanted to go to the Nou Camp but the Celtic end was sold out and you can't get into the stadium in the Barcelona end on a European night if you are from Britain as they wont let you in.

Last night I saw her shouting at a member of staff during dinner time, she is quite a tall lady and this man was smaller than her and she was towering over him waving her hand about and said "how good is your English?HOW GOOD IS YOUR ENGLISH?! Where is the food that is suitable for children here?!" The nice man calmly walked her to the children's buffet table which this idiot had clearly not seen and she didn't even apologise. I have seen her charging about the place today looking for something to complain about but haven't seen her in a few hours and I hope she has died of food poisoning.

[KnightswoodBear]

2 minutes ago, throbber said:

Currently at a resort not too far from Barcelona killing a few days after my city break and i must say that I find the behaviour of British tourists has been quite good despite a plethora of old firm/ Liverpool tops on display. There is however one woman who I have taken an intense disliking to. I disliked her immediately before I even saw her in fact, as I was reading through "The Damage Done" by James Oswald (good book by the way) I overheard this odious 45 ish year old Glasgweigan half wit openly complaining to strangers that the sun wasn't shining on her sun bed properly as there was a building in the way and this wouldn't have happened at the resort she stayed in last year. I then heard her say that her and her husband were big Celtic fans and wanted to go to the Nou Camp but the Celtic end was sold out and you can't get into the stadium in the Barcelona end on a European night if you are from Britain as they wont let you in.

Last night I saw her shouting at a member of staff during dinner time, she is quite a tall lady and this man was smaller than her and she was towering over him waving her hand about and said "how good is your English?HOW GOOD IS YOUR ENGLISH?! Where is the food that is suitable for children here?!" The nice man calmly walked her to the children's buffet table which this idiot had clearly not seen and she didn't even apologise. I have seen her charging about the place today looking for something to complain about but haven't seen her in a few hours and I hope she has died of food poisoning.

And yet, here you are furiously typing this onto P&B and her pie remains resolutely un-booted?

We all know who the real villain is here. 

[throbber]

I might try kick her in the vag before the holiday is over then. She is a total moron, her kids are obviously taken out of school out with school holiday time so she can have a cheaper holiday. Her husband is also a total cretin.

[Zen Archer (Raconteur)]

2 minutes ago, throbber said:

I might try kick her in the vag before the holiday is over then. She is a total moron, her kids are obviously taken out of school out with school holiday time so she can have a cheaper holiday. Her husband is also a total cretin.

Buy her a soft drink.

Spoiler

 

[SlipperyP]

4 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

And yet, here you are furiously typing this onto P&B and her pie remains resolutely un-booted?

We all know who the real villain is here. 

you really cant thrust him  anything about him, as down and out in Sidney was desperado ..

 

2 minutes ago, throbber said:

I might try kick her in the vag before the holiday is over then. She is a total moron, her kids are obviously taken out of school out with school holiday time so she can have a cheaper holiday. Her husband is also a total cretin.

Reverse, hope the girls good.