P45 Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 I used to go out with a bird who was a "dream therapist". She used to come up with elaborate meanings for the dreams I had. She was a total flake and it sounded like she was making it all up but people used to give her money for it. Well money for that or she just sucked them off instead. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smurph Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 I had a dream on Saturday night that I was staying in a hotel with a few people from college, though none of these people I actually go to college with, I have never met and they all looked kinda schemey. My lecturer was there though and a few of my genuine friends were in the room with me smoking weed. Some room service guy came in. I ended up killing him just like the narrator does to Angel Face in Fight Club, repeatedly just punching his face with seemingly no remorse. I've felt quite awful ever since. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 I've killed loved ones with a sledgehammer a couple of times in dreams. Quite upsetting as I didn't really want to do it but just did it anyway. Used to do labouring as a summer job so I'm pretty tasty with a sledgehammer too - CLANG CLANG to the napper. I'm not usually remotely murderous when awake. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 I cut my own cock off in a dream once. I'd managed to get myself tangled up in a big mass of twine and, somehow, I realised that the quick way to get out would be to slice off the ol' todger, which worked a treat. Don't think I've ever been so relieved to wake up from a dream before 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 I dreamt last night I got 2 pet Komodo dragons. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JakeSAFC Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 Dreamt that me and Robert Mugabe went fishing together in the Clyde and he caught a basking shark 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ya Bezzer! Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 I dreamt that I was discussing Gogol's surrealist short story 'The Nose' with Bernard Ponsonby. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 Last night I dreamt that I was lost in Kilmarnock town centre, attempting to get a train back to Aberdeen. F*** knows why. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) Last night was full on weird. Attended a Brechin v Dunfermline cup game at Starks Park wearing red and white in the away end... which somehow became a Pars v Brechin v Celtic somewhere along the way (at this point it should have really become a lucid dream I guess - how does that even work?)... before ending up as Brechin v Celtic. FT scoreboard said 3-0 to Celtic despite no goals being scored. Everyone was up in arms that they progressed. I ended up watching the game from the centre circle somehow, frequently getting in the way of the ball as well as accidentally catching a ball before it had gone out of play, trying to be useful but ruining everything instead. I even took a corner for Celtic at one point (with their permission). Then the really weird one. Was at a friend's garden BBQ and a giant, horrible, onshore octopus type thing (4 legs on each tentacle) started running around the place trying to eat people. It changed form back and forward into some woman and shooting her turned her back into the thing which resembled the growing pink thing from the film Evolution. Got it cornered into a microwave eventually and cooked the f***er after stabbing it with a stick didn't do much except piss it off considerably. An old school mate also died in a walking incident. Everybody was rather upset. I also managed to find a few geocaches but woke up, amazed that it had somehow registered them on the website. I had woken up in the dream it seems. I also accidentally blew up a petrol station. Edited March 31, 2015 by Hedgecutter 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I had a dream on Sunday night that I was watching Barcelona play Gibraltar in the Champions League. Gibraltar had David Marshall in goals. It went to penalties, mostly because the goals were about two feet wide. The fucking post (or specifically, one solitary co-op leaflet) woke me up before the shootout started. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) A quick bit of background; It always irritates me when folk talk about a football match and say something like "It should have been 3 but they missed those chances". This is nonsense of course and shows a basic failure to understand the flow of reality. They seem to think that reality is linear and that the game would have went in the exact same manner with the same chances, in exactly the same way, had they scored them. This is ludicrous as first of all the opposing team would have kicked off from centre, thus utterly changing the flow of how the game went. The opposing team could have scored themselves, or the team who won could have done so with no further goals or it could have been a draw. There is no real way to know unless you were able to catalogue infinite parrallel universes. Chaos theory tells us that even the slightest thing can change what happens, so to say the game would have went exactly the same despite an amount of things changing you couldn't even calculate is nonsense. So anyway, in my dream I met Dr Ian Malcolm, the mathematician from Jurassic Park (and it was Jeff Goldblum in the dream but in the dream he was only Dr Ian Malcolm), and discussed this with him, and pleased that he confirmed I was correct. Edited March 31, 2015 by DA Baracus 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Early this morning...... I was driving normally, then somehow ended up in a blizzard and got stuck just below the top of the hill that would somehow see me to safety. got out, slowly and with difficulty worked my way up the last few feet sinking about 2ft into the snow with each step, but dragging my car behind me (!) (And clearly my current car). Pulled it round to start off down the slope to safety, but it fell off a cliff edge of snow, about 100ft into some very brown muddy water. I was left, standing at the edge, knowing I couldn't move and that this was the end for me, and icy plunge to death. Then I woke up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
banana Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) Early this morning...... ...blizzard... snow... icy...Then I woke up. Edited March 31, 2015 by banana 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Dreamt I was watching a 747 (klm) float about the sky before crashing in a ball of flame. Quite a recurring dream for me. I had a dream years ago that I was on the play shed roof of my Primary School when an airliner barely cleared the school roof before crashing the other side of the building...... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamaldo Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Had a couple of really bizarre ones last night. First was me trying to go down some stairs but the structure was incredibly weak and, despite the two people I was with having no problems descending the stairs, I started having a panic attack and refused to move. The dream then cuts to me at the other side of the floor being calmed down with pieces of haribo. I'm then put onto a bus being driven by raving BritNat Alan Cochrane and, on trying to escape the bus, change my mind just as the door is closing and get stuck. Second was the results of the General Election coming in. The SNP do brilliantly, but in completely made-up seats. The ticker at the bottom has some incredible results, such as "SNP GAIN BART", and "SNP GAIN INVINTATION IN GYMNASIUM". I'm delighted even though I don't know what the f**k is going on with the constituency names. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 "SNP GAIN BART" "SNP GAIN INVINTATION IN GYMNASIUM" Actual tears laughing over that for some reason 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamaldo Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Actual tears laughing over that for some reason I was genuinely killing myself laughing after I woke up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan Vojáček Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 I had a dream years ago that I was on the play shed roof of my Primary School when an airliner barely cleared the school roof before crashing the other side of the building......I have this dream regularly as well except it goes over my house and crashes in the empty land beside it. I then go out with my brother and have a wee poke about the wreckage, luckily there's never any passengers or pilots. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ebanda's Handyman Services Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 I used to have recurring dreams about being on a crashing plane. The planes always have difficulty taking off and usually crash into corn fields. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
expatowner Posted April 19, 2015 Share Posted April 19, 2015 My mate was playing in goals for the opposition and had a team of English professionals in front of him. I was playing my usual central midfield power-house position. When the ball would get played to me the guys that I was supposed to be up against would melt to the sidelines and time and time again I would charge towards to the goals, shoot only for my mates arms to lengthen and save certain goals. Must have had 30 or 40 of these and each time his professional teammates would dissappear, I would bear down on goal and him with his flipping long arms would save my shots! Game finished 0-0 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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