Florentine_Pogen Posted January 22 Share Posted January 22 5 hours ago, Sergeant Wilson said: ^^^ BFTD, ZenArcher and Mullarkant prepare for a night on the town. Ladies beware. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gav-ffc Posted January 26 Share Posted January 26 In November a massive tree fell in our garden during the high winds and wiped out the telephone wires as we have the pole in our garden. Of late the fibre optic cabling has been getting updated in the street so for 2/3 weeks now they’ve slowly been digging up the street and paths leading to telephone poles. We had some tree surgeons ask last week to get into the garden as they are fixing the wires that were wiped out in the storm - we are with virgin like the neighbours so not really affected. She’s just sent me a screenshot of the ring camera with someone in high-vis going round the side of the house (where the pole is) and asked “WHOS THIS?”. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milton75 Posted January 26 Share Posted January 26 5 minutes ago, gav-ffc said: In November a massive tree fell in our garden during the high winds and wiped out the telephone wires as we have the pole in our garden. Of late the fibre optic cabling has been getting updated in the street so for 2/3 weeks now they’ve slowly been digging up the street and paths leading to telephone poles. We had some tree surgeons ask last week to get into the garden as they are fixing the wires that were wiped out in the storm - we are with virgin like the neighbours so not really affected. She’s just sent me a screenshot of the ring camera with someone in high-vis going round the side of the house (where the pole is) and asked “WHOS THIS?”. Reply "hopefully a murderer". 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted January 26 Share Posted January 26 On 22/01/2024 at 17:36, carpetmonster said: Couldn’t you just cut the bread in half and use two slots? He should buy another toaster and put that over the top of the other one. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Empty It Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 Why are woman always freezing when it's roasting and hot when it's baltic? And obviously their temperature takes precedent 100% of the time, woke up this morning freezing my bollocks off because she opened the window in the middle of the night. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 3 minutes ago, Empty It said: Why are woman always freezing when it's roasting and hot when it's baltic? And obviously their temperature takes precedent 100% of the time, woke up this morning freezing my bollocks off because she opened the window in the middle of the night. You haven't been on your Menopause Awareness Training yet, have you? 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Empty It Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 2 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: You haven't been on your Menopause Awareness Training yet, have you? She's 27, hope it's not Menopause yet, she's just a fucking weirdo. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 1 hour ago, Empty It said: She's 27, hope it's not Menopause yet, she's just a fucking weirdo. Well you've got your training and the real thing to look forward to. I don't want to spoil the surprise, but it doesn't get better. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimbaxters Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 7 hours ago, Sergeant Wilson said: Well you've got your training and the real thing to look forward to. I don't want to spoil the surprise, but it doesn't get better. Haha. Absolutely. Her "Is that heatin' oan?" Me "Aye" Five minutes later Her "It's roastin' in here!". Me "Take yer bra aff, hen" Spoiler...Doesn't work. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 23 hours ago, Empty It said: Why are woman always freezing when it's roasting and hot when it's baltic? And obviously their temperature takes precedent 100% of the time, woke up this morning freezing my bollocks off because she opened the window in the middle of the night. Don't stand bollock naked at the window then 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Salt n Vinegar Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 On 28/01/2024 at 09:41, Empty It said: Why are woman always freezing when it's roasting and hot when it's baltic? And obviously their temperature takes precedent 100% of the time, woke up this morning freezing my bollocks off because she opened the window in the middle of the night. It would have been too noisy for the milkman to get out the front door. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alta-pete Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 Hmmm. A two week hiatus to bump and on Valentines Day too… I have posted on here before about Mrs a-p’s inability to work a bread bin. I’m not a big bread eater but for my elevenses today I had a notion for a slice of toast. No loaf on top of the bin (where it usually resides) so I made the mistake of looking inside. Spoiler 14 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 5 minutes ago, alta-pete said: Hmmm. A two week hiatus to bump and on Valentines Day too… I have posted on here before about Mrs a-p’s inability to work a bread bin. I’m not a big bread eater but for my elevenses today I had a notion for a slice of toast. No loaf on top of the bin (where it usually resides) so I made the mistake of looking inside. Hide contents @Honest Saints Fan 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Khaki Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 1 hour ago, alta-pete said: Hmmm. A two week hiatus to bump and on Valentines Day too… I have posted on here before about Mrs a-p’s inability to work a bread bin. I’m not a big bread eater but for my elevenses today I had a notion for a slice of toast. No loaf on top of the bin (where it usually resides) so I made the mistake of looking inside. Reveal hidden contents This is a common occurrence at Mrs Khaki's gaff. She has ADHD, and seemingly one of the symptoms is clocking that the bread is days out of date, but it not registering that perhaps the remnants of said loaf need binned. If I'm feeling helpful I'll usually ask if she needs anything from the shop before I visit, and it's only when I appear with a fresh loaf that she'll turf whatever monstrosity is busy evolving sentience in the back of the bread bin. Her logic is something along the lines of not wanting it "contaminating" the fresh loaf 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimbaxters Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 Her completely irrational reaction to having to fill out the most basic of forms. She holds a high powered job position but crumbles at having to list basic things like her passport number or a list of dates. "Och, dae that for me!" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobbykdy Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 16 minutes ago, jimbaxters said: Her completely irrational reaction to having to fill out the most basic of forms. She holds a high powered job position but crumbles at having to list basic things like her passport number or a list of dates. "Och, dae that for me!" You are being mugged off. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 2 hours ago, jimbaxters said: Her completely irrational reaction to having to fill out the most basic of forms. She holds a high powered job position but crumbles at having to list basic things like her passport number or a list of dates. "Och, dae that for me!" 2 hours ago, bobbykdy said: You are being mugged off. Totally. Someone else to blame if something goes tits up. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 1 hour ago, Boghead ranter said: Totally. Someone else to blame if something goes tits up. "But you filled it out..." 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest Saints Fan Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 On 14/02/2024 at 11:06, Rugster said: @Honest Saints Fan ? Its you who doesn't know how a bread bin works. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greendot Posted February 17 Share Posted February 17 (edited) 23 hours ago, jimbaxters said: Her completely irrational reaction to having to fill out the most basic of forms. She holds a high powered job position but crumbles at having to list basic things like her passport number or a list of dates. "Och, dae that for me!" Advantage if she can't be arsed with that then you get to holiday in peace? Edited February 17 by greendot 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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