tamthebam Posted May 21, 2020 Share Posted May 21, 2020 4 hours ago, Mr. Alli said: Tamthebam level patter here. It's all been downhill since the selfie. Oi! I like to think of it more as GordonD patter you cnut 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted May 21, 2020 Share Posted May 21, 2020 13 hours ago, BigFatTabbyDave said: Just catching up: I'd be delighted to be Brian Blessed. Sorry, I'D BE DELIGHTED TO BE BRIAN! BLESSED!!! I'd also be very proud to be DA Baracus' father, but I've never pumped a girl from Fife. And I'll leave that there to be FTFY'd. My beard is never itchy, so there may be something to the regular washing thing. I may be a tramp, but a hygienic one. Top lip trimming is essential. Those Old West laddies with the massive soup-strainer used to carry implements around just to move their 'tache in order to take a drink. f**k that shit! Trimming pubes = fine. Full-on shaving/waxing is for masochists and looks fucking weird. Male genitalia looks bizarre and freaky at the best of times; you don't want that shit fully exposed. My maw is from Glasgow. My supposed father is too. In fact they were both born in the same hospital. In the same ward. On the same day. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted May 21, 2020 Share Posted May 21, 2020 Regarding penii: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted May 22, 2020 Share Posted May 22, 2020 8 hours ago, DA Baracus said: My maw is from Glasgow. My supposed father is too. In fact they were both born in the same hospital. In the same ward. On the same day. Twins? 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted May 22, 2020 Share Posted May 22, 2020 3 hours ago, Granny Danger said: Twins? No. Both of their mothers have confirmed otherwise. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted May 22, 2020 Share Posted May 22, 2020 1 minute ago, DA Baracus said: No. Both of their mothers have confirmed otherwise. Aye, right Joffrey. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartsOfficialMoaner Posted May 27, 2020 Share Posted May 27, 2020 On 21/05/2020 at 11:41, Smurph said: I probably trim my beard every six weeks, just to make sure the neck hair doesn't fuse with my chest hair and so I can eat burgers without causing myself physical pain. Takes 5 minutes all in. How long does it take to shave? It's pretty much just like getting a hair cut. Imagine that. What posers. You come across as a bit of a tramp, TBH. What about the beard oil? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted June 3, 2020 Share Posted June 3, 2020 On 21/05/2020 at 16:27, HeartsOfficialMoaner said: I just don't want to, I'm more caveman/tramp/natural look. You grow a beard? You spend time with a mirror trimming it and shaping it. A poser. You should take pride in your appearance. Have some self respect man. -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smurph Posted June 3, 2020 Share Posted June 3, 2020 On 27/05/2020 at 22:44, HeartsOfficialMoaner said: You come across as a bit of a tramp, TBH. What about the beard oil? My first post on this thread was that I wash regularly and beard oil is a load of nonsense. Anything else? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venti Posted February 7 Share Posted February 7 Four years. Is that a record Necro? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted February 7 Share Posted February 7 Richard III in the White House cowering behind divider curtains. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted February 7 Share Posted February 7 2 hours ago, hividoy said: Everytime I think just let the beard grow as it will off set the bald head I get so far before I get annoyed and shave it off. It just grows into a big spikey jaggy homeless look mess if i'm honest, how do other guys do it? Phone up the Boston Red Sox and ask them. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theroadlesstravelled Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 My eyebrows are needing trimmed and shaped. Taking clippers to them made it look like I have alopecia. Any suggestions? Should I comb them up and cut across with scissors? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 1 hour ago, Theroadlesstravelled said: My eyebrows are needing trimmed and shaped. Taking clippers to them made it look like I have alopecia. Any suggestions? Should I comb them up and cut across with scissors? Funnily enough, for the 1st time on Sunday my barber used the clippers to trim my eyebrows - No 1 blade. I was anxious but it worked out fine. Previously, the barber has just combed up and trimmed with scissors. Different barber each time, though. All included in the price of £1.50 including tip - I rejected the offer of a shoulder massage as I was in a bit of a hurry. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 At the current rate of barber add-ons, it won't be long before they're asking if you want a pubic trim. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 7 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: At the current rate of barber add-ons, it won't be long before they're asking if you want a pubic trim. That's an extra 50p in my barber's. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 48 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: At the current rate of barber add-ons, it won't be long before they're asking if you want a pubic trim. I dont have time for that. Asshole wax takes precedence. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 3 hours ago, hk blues said: Funnily enough, for the 1st time on Sunday my barber used the clippers to trim my eyebrows - No 1 blade. I was anxious but it worked out fine. Previously, the barber has just combed up and trimmed with scissors. Different barber each time, though. All included in the price of £1.50 including tip - I rejected the offer of a shoulder massage as I was in a bit of a hurry. A shoulder massage from a barber? I just can't get my head around that one. Does he break out the scented candles and stick on an Enya CD, too? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 28 minutes ago, scottsdad said: A shoulder massage from a barber? I just can't get my head around that one. Does he break out the scented candles and stick on an Enya CD, too? I guess he would if you asked him. It's totally normal here to give a 2 or 3 minute shoulder massage - I find it kinda weird and always say no if they ask but usually they just fire on. All included in the princely sum of £1. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted July 31 Share Posted July 31 3 minutes ago, hk blues said: I guess he would if you asked him. It's totally normal here to give a 2 or 3 minute shoulder massage - I find it kinda weird and always say no if they ask but usually they just fire on. All included in the princely sum of £1. One last thing. Is "shoulder" a euphemism here? Are we talking about a haircut with a happy ending? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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