GordonD Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 14 hours ago, Granny Danger said: Did he/she remember the last time Dundee won a piece of major silverware? When she's grown up, will she remember when United were in the Premiership? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blootoon87 Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 After a heavy night on hogmanay, I got a text from a random number yesterday with a kiss at the end. Good times I thought, must've been in autopilot. After a couple of messages trying to inoffensively figure out who she was and already deciding she was a stunner, it turns out it was my ma trolling f**k out of me on her new number. Banter ma, banter. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8MileBU Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 After a heavy night on hogmanay, I got a text from a random number yesterday with a kiss at the end. Good times I thought, must've been in autopilot. After a couple of messages trying to inoffensively figure out who she was and already deciding she was a stunner, it turns out it was my ma trolling f**k out of me on her new number. Banter ma, banter. ^^^ Sends willy pic. Gets text back:"I used to wash that. It's not grown any. Love Mum x"[emoji6][emoji39] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invergowrie arab Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Since hogmanay I have been going through an extremely acrimonious break up which will probably end in divorce due to the discovery of infidelity in text messages. It's f**k all to do with me, its the missus's sister and her man but all the same for the last three days now i have still been going through it as much as anyone. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotThePars Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 15 minutes ago, invergowrie arab said: Since hogmanay I have been going through an extremely acrimonious break up which will probably end in divorce due to the discovery of infidelity in text messages. It's f**k all to do with me, its the missus's sister and her man but all the same for the last three days now i have still been going through it as much as anyone. Great storytelling here though, fair play. I was already halfway to wishing you condolences. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invergowrie arab Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 If it was me at least I would have had the consolation of pumping a wee tidy to make up for hearing about every detail of everything ie the same details as they were three days ago. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 New kitchen appliance delivered at five past seven this morning. Whit? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jambomo Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Commentators on games saying "Just about" all the time. As in "He just about cleared that strike" or "the goalkeeper just about kept that out". There's no fucking "just about" about it, they either cleared/saved etc the ball or they didn't. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 47 minutes ago, NewBornBairn said: New kitchen appliance delivered at five past seven this morning. Whit? ^^^^ Girlfriend turned up on his doorstep, pished, in a taxi 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 33 minutes ago, GordonD said: ^^^^ Girlfriend turned up on his doorstep, pished, in a taxi Aye, that'd please the wife right enough. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 1 minute ago, NewBornBairn said: Aye, that'd please the wife right enough. Well, if it had been the wife I doubt you'd have described her as a "new" kitchen appliance... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 true 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiskychimp Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Don't know whether I should post this or not. I may ruin lives.... ..... I have recently had the conscious thought that I don't how to use a pillow. They're not fat enough to cover the distance from head to bed when sleeping on your side. If you're on your back, should you have just your head on, or head and shoulders. Should you actually do without a pillow at all? These thoughts are now what keep me awake 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MEADOWXI Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Various reasons spent much of last few days in pubs....the current shite I am hearing as FACTS between the drunk bellends as I try to read paper and watch the football is'Malt Whisky can only be Malt whisky if brewed in sherry casks''Now Andy Murray is a Sir he is guaranteed £100K a year minimum salary from from the state'The level of stupidity in humanity that 2016 failed to kill depresses me 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
19QOS19 Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Don't know whether I should post this or not. I may ruin lives.... ..... I have recently had the conscious thought that I don't how to use a pillow. They're not fat enough to cover the distance from head to bed when sleeping on your side. If you're on your back, should you have just your head on, or head and shoulders. Should you actually do without a pillow at all? These thoughts are now what keep me awake You need a chunkier pillow. Memory foam is the way to go. You can fit your shoulders and head on your pillow? Are you Kevin Finlayson? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supermik Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 1 hour ago, whiskychimp said: Don't know whether I should post this or not. I may ruin lives.... ..... I have recently had the conscious thought that I don't how to use a pillow. They're not fat enough to cover the distance from head to bed when sleeping on your side. If you're on your back, should you have just your head on, or head and shoulders. Should you actually do without a pillow at all? These thoughts are now what keep me awake Think there is a poster on here that is a bit of an expert on pillows that cover your head on the bed.. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 1 hour ago, 19QOS19 said: You need a chunkier pillow. Memory foam is the way to go. You can fit your shoulders and head on your pillow? Are you Kevin Finlayson? James Forrest imo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiskychimp Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 1 hour ago, 19QOS19 said: You need a chunkier pillow. Memory foam is the way to go. You can fit your shoulders and head on your pillow? Are you Kevin Finlayson? Memory foam is shite unless you spend the whole night in one position. Move and it doesn't respond quick enough.... Robbing tempur bas' 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiskychimp Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 4 minutes ago, Rugster said: James Forrest imo Wind yer neck in.. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
19QOS19 Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Memory foam is shite unless you spend the whole night in one position. Move and it doesn't respond quick enough.... Robbing tempur bas' It does if you get a decent one. There are loads of different types. Some are shite, like you say. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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