Jump to content

Things you want to share with P&B


Ad Lib

Recommended Posts

Had a dream I won the European Cup with Aston Villa the other night, and lifted the grand trophy with one hand, making a picture perfect moment. The same day, I drove up to Hampden to witness the Pars beat Hearts to win the League Cup, and was given permission to lift it.

John Terry IMO

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sadly, this question was asked mere hours before the first Fife derby in nearly a decade, and so I decided to head off to East End Park to watch Rovers get skelped 3-1 while sitting in utter agony. The following day, and a trip to A&E happened where I said to the doctor "I don't think its broken"...which was met with a swift reply of getting telt.

Sadly, this occurred two weeks before the start of Uni. The upside was that when heading out with my arm in a sling, I was from time to time accosted by different lassies asking if I was alright.

You were a brave man attending the match. I'm not sure I'd have managed a Dundee derby of the same magnitude had it fallen on Sunday there.

I went for a pint last night. (Given the fact I'd been battering into the pain killers all day I nursed the same one for an hour then had a Coke. Sensible as f**k). I did notice I was drawing some sympathetic glances from the girls! I also met the Lithuanian lassie I mentioned in the 'How weird are you?' thread, which was nice :D

The thing I'm taking bad with most is not being able to sleep in any position but on my back. I usually sleep on my front or curled up on my side. I keep instinctively trying to move into these positions and getting a resulting blast of pain, which doesn't make for great night's rest. Getting a t-shirt on and off is also a bit of a nightmare. All-in-all, it's totally worth it for the time off work :D

Edited by dundeebarry
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The following day, and a trip to A&E happened where I said to the doctor "I don't think its broken"...which was met with a swift reply of getting telt.

Sadly, this occurred two weeks before the start of Uni. The upside was that when heading out with my arm in a sling, I was from time to time accosted by different lassies asking if I was alright.

Are you Ted Bundy?

Edited by JamboMikey
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My dream last night involved ghost hunting with Paul Merson and Chris Kamara.

Brilliant concept for a TV special. That would be class.

Stelling would be coordinating things from the studio as the pundits roam around a haunted house. Kamara dressed as a Ghostbuster, missing his cues because he's fannying about with his proton pack; Charlie Nicholas and Merson jumping about and squealing at the slightest creek like a pair of wee lassies and Phil Thompson pretending to be channeling Hillsborough victims seeking justice from beyond the grave. ("It was the poliiiissssss"). As soon as the camera was on any of them Matt le Tissier would be heard yelling "Ghost! Oohhhhh!" in the background, yet when the camera switches to him it transpires f**k all's happening and he's just being an attention seeking c**t as per usual.

To finish up they'd gather to do a sceance, reach the spirit of the Godfather of Soul and start doing the dance they do when that James Brown guy scores. News comes in that Stockport are winning and everyone goes home happy.

In short, it would be excellent television and no more of a sham than anything that charlatan Derek Acora is involved in.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I had a dream last night that my missus was being cowped by some old, ugly fucker. I was pretty put out to be honest.

I'm also near the end of Skagboys and find some of the more schemie words from the book that I'd have used when I was younger are creeping back into my lexicon.

This doesn't bode well for my well to do pretence when talking to the genuinely well to do.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest The Phoenix

I had a dream last night that my missus was being cowped by some old, ugly fucker. I was pretty put out to be honest.

I suspect it wasn't a dream.

Getting a knock back like that from the missus, can play tricks on your mind. ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

That's a very good shout, actually. I'm no expert but I think 30mg is a decent dosage. I'm no drug dealer, but it's high time I started dealing drugs.

Any c**t need some pills? PM me. Free thimble of laxative with every purchase. :D

I assume you've been given co-codamol 30/500?

The real dogs danglies are codydramol, dihydrocodeine or tramadol.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Brilliant concept for a TV special. That would be class.

Stelling would be coordinating things from the studio as the pundits roam around a haunted house. Kamara dressed as a Ghostbuster, missing his cues because he's fannying about with his proton pack; Charlie Nicholas and Merson jumping about and squealing at the slightest creek like a pair of wee lassies and Phil Thompson pretending to be channeling Hillsborough victims seeking justice from beyond the grave. ("It was the poliiiissssss"). As soon as the camera was on any of them Matt le Tissier would be heard yelling "Ghost! Oohhhhh!" in the background, yet when the camera switches to him it transpires f**k all's happening and he's just being an attention seeking c**t as per usual.

To finish up they'd gather to do a sceance, reach the spirit of the Godfather of Soul and start doing the dance they do when that James Brown guy scores. News comes in that Stockport are winning and everyone goes home happy.

In short, it would be excellent television and no more of a sham than anything that charlatan Derek Acora is involved in.

Thompson also has the correct accent to give it the full beans when possessed "Charlie loves Dick!!! CHARLIE LOVES DICK!!!!!!!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I had a dream last night that my missus was being cowped by some old, ugly fucker. I was pretty put out to be honest.

I'm also near the end of Skagboys and find some of the more schemie words from the book that I'd have used when I was younger are creeping back into my lexicon.

This doesn't bode well for my well to do pretence when talking to the genuinely well to do.

Glad it's not just me that Irvine Welsh has that effect on. My Brain goes a bit Begbie although fortunately, not as far as to make me go 'Plungin' folk. I did text my wife "Cos i fuckin well says so, c**t!" Which required a rapid retraction.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I assume you've been given co-codamol 30/500?

The real dogs danglies are codydramol, dihydrocodeine or tramadol.

Spot on, Pete.

A mate who had a hernia recently gave me some of these tramadol things yesterday. Definitely stronger stuff fhan co-codimol. I was up late on them, and rattled a f**k load of stuff off for a story i'm working on. Had a weird and erratic sleep on them too. I'm not even sure if my collar bone still hurts. I suspect it does, but I'm too spaced to feel it.

These prescription drugs are heavier than I've previously given them credit for.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Apologies if posted before/elsewhere but this just appeared on my Twitter feed:

1. In Google Maps, type in 47.110579 9.227568

2. Click the green arrow.

3. Select 'more' and go to street view.

4. Scroll up two then go left twice.

Freaky!

Must've been Photoshopped, pretty freaky though.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Apologies if posted before/elsewhere but this just appeared on my Twitter feed:

1. In Google Maps, type in 47.110579 9.227568

2. Click the green arrow.

3. Select 'more' and go to street view.

4. Scroll up two then go left twice.

Freaky!

nothing there,

ahh, see it now, meh.

http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?q=47.110579,9.227568&hl=en&ll=47.112638,9.203689&spn=0.002326,0.004823&sll=47.110579,9.227569&sspn=0.001042,0.002642&vpsrc=0&t=h&layer=c&cbll=47.112689,9.20352&panoid=L4LrPKIr2EpHByHb4vuCcg&cbp=12,150.89,,0,-20.62&z=18

my guess is a dead insect on the camera lense

Edited by gingapar
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   1 member

×
×
  • Create New...