Depression

[Jives Miguel]

Anyone have any experience of getting diagnosed with ADHD as an adult? The more I read about it, and testimonies of people with it the more I relate it to the mess of my life.

 

I have terrible social skill, inability to tell jokes or stories in a coherent fashion, constantly cant get things I'm trying to say from my brain to my mouth, mumble and speak too fast,  fall over my words, get told I talk too loudly when I've had  a drink. Clumsy b*****d always knocking over pints in the pub.

Its so hard for me to do tasks/works when there are other options of things to do that are immediately more pleasurable or enjoyable. In my job the only motivating factor I have to do work is fear of getting caught not doing it. In my home life its the same. I still have boxes sitting in front of my front door from when I moved in last year, it took me 3 months to open birthday cards I got this year, i can never bring myself to do washing clothes or the dishes until I have no choice but to do it. And when I do finally do it, the clothes stay on the drying wrack until I want to wear them or the next load of washing goes up. I have terrible willpower too and its so easy to lie to myself/talk myself out of doing things.  Ithe cant bring myself to do things that are undesirable until there is a build up of necessity/shame/fear

I have no goals or aspirations in life, and never have at any point ever. I think if i got  I used to get in trouble at school from gudance teachers because I never had a clue what I wanted to do with my life. Still dont. I was not able to get a good degree in uni, because the external motivational factors I had which enabled me to do decent in school (getting in trouble for not doing well, and not wanting to get worse grades than my friends) were gone.  It was impossible for me to concentrate in lectures, or even study. When I got round to studying for exams, it wasn't studying, it was learning the material for the first time. Coursework always started late as possible. I handed in my dissertation 6 hours late after a 27 hour session in the library finishing it. I didn't even start doing the referencing for it until after the hand-in deadline had passed. 

 

Sorry spilling out my lifestory, does this sound familiar to any ADHD-havers on here? 

[Guest]

2 minutes ago, Jives Miguel said:

Anyone have any experience of getting diagnosed with ADHD as an adult? The more I read about it, and testimonies of people with it the more I relate it to the mess of my life.

 

I have terrible social skill, inability to tell jokes or stories in a coherent fashion, constantly cant get things I'm trying to say from my brain to my mouth, mumble and speak too fast,  fall over my words, get told I talk too loudly when I've had  a drink. Clumsy b*****d always knocking over pints in the pub.

Its so hard for me to do tasks/works when there are other options of things to do that are immediately more pleasurable or enjoyable. In my job the only motivating factor I have to do work is fear of getting caught not doing it. In my home life its the same. I still have boxes sitting in front of my front door from when I moved in last year, it took me 3 months to open birthday cards I got this year, i can never bring myself to do washing clothes or the dishes until I have no choice but to do it. And when I do finally do it, the clothes stay on the drying wrack until I want to wear them or the next load of washing goes up. I have terrible willpower too and its so easy to lie to myself/talk myself out of doing things.  Ithe cant bring myself to do things that are undesirable until there is a build up of necessity/shame/fear

I have no goals or aspirations in life, and never have at any point ever. I think if i got  I used to get in trouble at school from gudance teachers because I never had a clue what I wanted to do with my life. Still dont. I was not able to get a good degree in uni, because the external motivational factors I had which enabled me to do decent in school (getting in trouble for not doing well, and not wanting to get worse grades than my friends) were gone.  It was impossible for me to concentrate in lectures, or even study. When I got round to studying for exams, it wasn't studying, it was learning the material for the first time. Coursework always started late as possible. I handed in my dissertation 6 hours late after a 27 hour session in the library finishing it. I didn't even start doing the referencing for it until after the hand-in deadline had passed. 

 

Sorry spilling out my lifestory, does this sound familiar to any ADHD-havers on here? 

Getting diagnosed with anything is a complete pain in the dick unfortunately. Doctors are referring because that's how they've decided to get waiting lists down. Speak to the ADHD coalition and you should be able to get some advice about living undiagnosed or what you can access

[Rugster]

Don’t argue in this thread please

[Ekhibee88]

15 minutes ago, Jives Miguel said:

Anyone have any experience of getting diagnosed with ADHD as an adult? The more I read about it, and testimonies of people with it the more I relate it to the mess of my life.

 

I have terrible social skill, inability to tell jokes or stories in a coherent fashion, constantly cant get things I'm trying to say from my brain to my mouth, mumble and speak too fast,  fall over my words, get told I talk too loudly when I've had  a drink. Clumsy b*****d always knocking over pints in the pub.

Its so hard for me to do tasks/works when there are other options of things to do that are immediately more pleasurable or enjoyable. In my job the only motivating factor I have to do work is fear of getting caught not doing it. In my home life its the same. I still have boxes sitting in front of my front door from when I moved in last year, it took me 3 months to open birthday cards I got this year, i can never bring myself to do washing clothes or the dishes until I have no choice but to do it. And when I do finally do it, the clothes stay on the drying wrack until I want to wear them or the next load of washing goes up. I have terrible willpower too and its so easy to lie to myself/talk myself out of doing things.  Ithe cant bring myself to do things that are undesirable until there is a build up of necessity/shame/fear

I have no goals or aspirations in life, and never have at any point ever. I think if i got  I used to get in trouble at school from gudance teachers because I never had a clue what I wanted to do with my life. Still dont. I was not able to get a good degree in uni, because the external motivational factors I had which enabled me to do decent in school (getting in trouble for not doing well, and not wanting to get worse grades than my friends) were gone.  It was impossible for me to concentrate in lectures, or even study. When I got round to studying for exams, it wasn't studying, it was learning the material for the first time. Coursework always started late as possible. I handed in my dissertation 6 hours late after a 27 hour session in the library finishing it. I didn't even start doing the referencing for it until after the hand-in deadline had passed. 

 

Sorry spilling out my lifestory, does this sound familiar to any ADHD-havers on here? 

Sounds similar to me. Can find it hard to keep up with conservations and process information. At work I'm behind and a bit slower typing. I find it hard in noisy environments. I am usually very quiet at work, find it a very social/nosy environment so put my barriers up. 

[Guest]

Confidence has gone. Stepping away from here see you soon guys

[The Moonster]

10 hours ago, Autistisches Nilpferd said:

Confidence has gone. Stepping away from here see you soon guys

I've now viewed the post that brought this on and honestly pal, don't beat yourself up, it doesn't come across as racist at all. You've made some 5,000 posts on this site and if that's the only one that people are using to deem you racist then they are well wide of the mark (and I'm not even sure the guy accusing you felt there was any malice either). Take a few days if you need to but I wouldn't let this play on your mind or doubt yourself over it.

[Venti]

12 hours ago, Autistisches Nilpferd said:

Confidence has gone. Stepping away from here see you soon guys

As Moon says, don't beat yourself up.

Certainly don't step away. There's no judgement on this thread.

[Ocelot1877]

Sorry if this isn’t the right place for this kind of thing 

I got a ton of missed calls from a no caller ID number last night like 8 in 10 minutes at approx 22:50.  They left no voicemails or messages and iv had nothing today 

Anyone got any idea what that la about or experienced similar? 
 

Im surprised how much this has wobbled my mental health today

[TxRover]

5 minutes ago, Ocelot1877 said:

Sorry if this isn’t the right place for this kind of thing 

I got a ton of missed calls from a no caller ID number last night like 8 in 10 minutes at approx 22:50.  They left no voicemails or messages and iv had nothing today 

Anyone got any idea what that la about or experienced similar? 
 

Im surprised how much this has wobbled my mental health today

Could you have used “1471” and option 3 to see if it would give you any info or reverse the call? (for a fee, I believe)

 

There’s been a huge increase in scam phone calls (at least in U.S.) from no caller ID numbers that are people pretending to be relatives (especially grandchildren) in trouble and needing money sent right away. Could have been something like that…repeated calls with no message left suggests either a scam or someone repeatedly trying a number and not believing it’s wrong.

[Ocelot1877]

14 minutes ago, TxRover said:

Could you have used “1471” and option 3 to see if it would give you any info or reverse the call? (for a fee, I believe)

 

There’s been a huge increase in scam phone calls (at least in U.S.) from no caller ID numbers that are people pretending to be relatives (especially grandchildren) in trouble and needing money sent right away. Could have been something like that…repeated calls with no message left suggests either a scam or someone repeatedly trying a number and not believing it’s wrong.

Unfortunately 1471 isn’t in use anymore I believe. 
 

Don’t know why it’s rattled me so much it’s so daft. Just thought it was an emergency and the Polis or the Bank were wanting to talk to me. I guess if it was anything important they would have left a message, followed up today or came to my door. 
 

Just feel pure worried about it all today, like I say it’s daft but unfortunately it’s where I am. 

Edited November 6, 2023 by Ocelot1877

[LiviLion]

36 minutes ago, Ocelot1877 said:

Don’t know why it’s rattled me so much it’s so daft. Just thought it was an emergency and the Polis or the Bank were wanting to talk to me. I guess if it was anything important they would have left a message, followed up today or came to my door. 

Second part of this is the important bit. If it was something urgent enough for a load of quick missed calls then you'd have someone at your door (a police matter), at least one voicemail (the bank - doubt they'd be phoning you at that time anyway), or messages on Whatsapp/Facebook/calls from other people (a family/friend issue).

It's most likely a scam, if not they'd have found another way to get in touch and/or would have persisted today.

[DA Baracus]

A quick Google suggests it's a fairly common scam.

[RH33]

It'll be an automatic dialler.

[Ocelot1877]

Thanks everyone for your reassurance, like I say I know I was being daft but I just needed to get it out my head. 
 

you are good people 

[scottsdad]

17 hours ago, Ocelot1877 said:

Sorry if this isn’t the right place for this kind of thing 

I got a ton of missed calls from a no caller ID number last night like 8 in 10 minutes at approx 22:50.  They left no voicemails or messages and iv had nothing today 

Anyone got any idea what that la about or experienced similar? 
 

Im surprised how much this has wobbled my mental health today

If you bought anything from AO.com recently then it'll be the guy selling insurance. 

[Venti]

Neighbour of mine lost her husband during Covid & doesn't seem to get many visitors.

Just a pot of tea & cake seemed to make her day.

Lonliness seems to go under the radar.

[TxRover]

4 hours ago, Venti said:

Neighbour of mine lost her husband during Covid & doesn't seem to get many visitors.

Just a pot of tea & cake seemed to make her day.

Lonliness seems to go under the radar.

People are reticent to discuss it, but a neighbour with an eye can make a huge difference. Huge props!

[Venti]

1 hour ago, TxRover said:

People are reticent to discuss it, but a neighbour with an eye can make a huge difference. Huge props!

Not trying to be neighbour of the year, but its a good thing to look out for folk who just want a cuppa & a blether.

[RH33]

Been up all night

 

None my rescue medication in.

[FK1Bairn]

Was wfh yesterday and on logging in found an email my boss sent to the full team on thursday evening saying theres a team meeting at 2pm this wednesday that we're all expected to attend, no exceptions. 

I keep wondering whats going to be said at the meeting as i'm reading it as there's something big going down.  I know I'm being silly and it's probably the start of monthly team meetings that we haven't had in about 4 months. 

This on top of the sudden passing of a former colleague last week we all knew and liked has got my brain working overtime.