Work colleagues

[strichener]

On 06/09/2020 at 11:45, Caledonian1 said:

I used to know a guy called Alexander Alexander - he was just known as Double Sandy (great  nickname I thought)  This was maybe 40 odd years ago. 

Come to think of it there was a Sandy Alexander in the same village too....so there were Double Double Sandy's..........

 

Had a guy at school called Robert Robert Robertson.  He got called frog

[microdave]

13 hours ago, tamthebam said:

I was due to fly to Helsinki via Brussels the next day 

As can be expected security was very tight in Turnhouse. In Brussels they didn't give a f**k. And I remember thinking on the way to Helsinki "it'll be okay, no-one hates the Finns..."

 

3 hours ago, bernardblack said:

 

I was warming up to come on in the schools cup game, in first year.

Was told that WW3 was happening merely seconds before joining the match.

I’m blaming that for my performance that day...

 

 I really wasn't asking.

8 minutes ago, strichener said:

Had a guy at school called Robert Robert Robertson.  He got called frog

Wait. His first name and his middle name are exactly the same. I'm against the death penalty but I'd make an exception for his parents.

[tamthebam]

2 hours ago, microdave said:

 

 I really wasn't asking.

 

[RH33]

14 hours ago, MONKMAN said:

Gender reveal parties are for attention seeking fuckwits, who should be stoned to death.

My kids asked me couple weeks ago if I’d had gender reveal party.

i replied I hadn’t felt need to have a party cause I’d had sex.

They looked suitably disgusted.

[D.A.F.C]

10 hours ago, Cardinal Richelieu said:

Weird looking ultrasound.

[MONKMAN]

2 hours ago, RH33 said:

I replied I hadn’t felt need to have a party cause I’d had sex.

Shagging should always be celebrated, but a party is a bit much. 

[Zen Archer (Raconteur)]

52 minutes ago, MONKMAN said:

Shagging should always be celebrated, but a party is a bit much. 

It depends how old you are.

[The Golden God]

Getting moaned at for being slow/shite at my job by someone who was completely useless, hated by almost all the staff and just a complete arsehole in general. I’m not claiming I’m absolutely amazing at what I do or anything but having someone completely shite moaning is a step too far.

[Mark Connolly]

I thought "gender reveal parties" couldn't get more odd, then started seeing stuff like this

[Jacksgranda]

On 10/09/2020 at 23:36, Sugar_Army said:

I always wondered why my older brother (first born in the family) got a single Christian name unrelated to anybody in the family but when I came along 9 years later I got two Christian names (my father's then another unrelated to the family).  To add to my confusion I was never known by my first Christian name but by my second.

I always assumed that if you were going to name a son after the father it was usually given to the first born male.

I gave up asking as I always seemed to get fobbed off.

Then when I was about 25 I happened to ask again at which point my mother blurted out...

"FFS!  If you really must know your father got pissed before he went to the registrar and got all sentimental...that is how your first name that was not even meant to be your name at all became your first name and how your second name that was meant to be your only name became your second name but is used as if it was your first name!".

My reply was..."erm, thanks for clearing that up, I think!"

Did you ever discover what the milkman's name was?

[Jacksgranda]

23 hours ago, Mr. Alli said:

Oh, honey honey. 

Thanks, Archie...

[GordonD]

12 hours ago, MONKMAN said:

Shagging should always be celebrated, but a party is a bit much. 

Wasn't a proper party, it was just him on his own. Just like the sex.

[D.A.F.C]

Getting moaned at for being slow/shite at my job by someone who was completely useless, hated by almost all the staff and just a complete arsehole in general. I’m not claiming I’m absolutely amazing at what I do or anything but having someone completely shite moaning is a step too far.

Had this every day for several years.
Spend three hours reworking shite from others then get told off for missing an apostrophe on paperwork by someone who refused to do my job.
Yes, its my fault for not leaving but its a count to ten everytime it happens.
One day I lost it and asked if their keyboard was broken.
Supervisor and management encourage these idiots and its not just at me. They think theyre wonderful but they're just gatekeeper arseholes. Believe it or not our product is triple checked and so is the paperwork. The software can check itself and we have suggested it. Nope, lets pay five people to check a spreadsheet.
As said its my fault for staying but ffs its annoying as f**k.

[Sergeant Wilson]

57 minutes ago, D.A.F.C said:

Had this every day for several years.
Spend three hours reworking shite from others then get told off for missing an apostrophe on paperwork by someone who refused to do my job.
Yes, its my fault for not leaving but its a count to ten everytime it happens.
One day I lost it and asked if their keyboard was broken.
Supervisor and management encourage these idiots and its not just at me. They think theyre wonderful but they're just gatekeeper arseholes. Believe it or not our product is triple checked and so is the paperwork. The software can check itself and we have suggested it. Nope, lets pay five people to check a spreadsheet.
As said its my fault for staying but ffs its annoying as f**k.

You've done it again!

[BFTD]

This week's pet hate: requiring people to do more work because nobody in another department knows how to efficiently operate modern technology.

For example, you're provided with a (shittly-formatted) Word document to manually record financial information on. Most of the figures can be calculated from other figures from that day, or from previous days. Why aren't we using a spreadsheet to do all this automatically? Nobody in Finance, who are being paid substantially more than you, knows how to use Excel. So you knock up a quick spreadsheet, format it to look exactly like the awful Word document, and send in your figures using it. It gets knocked back; you might have got the figures wrong using this...whereas you'd obviously have got the figures right using a calculator for every entry  

You mention this stupidity to another staff member, who says, that's nothing - they used to send us blank printouts of the Word document, which we had to fill in by hand. We sent them back in the mail, they'd take a picture of it, and keep a copy of the document in JPG form. And this was less than five years ago  

[D.A.F.C]

38 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

You've done it again!

^^^gatekeeper found

Edited September 12, 2020 by D.A.F.C

[Sergeant Wilson]

Just now, D.A.F.C said:

So have you!

I'm not the one complaining.

[D.A.F.C]

1 minute ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

I'm not the one complaining.

You just did.

[Sergeant Wilson]

3 minutes ago, D.A.F.C said:

You just did.

Pointed out, it wasn't a formal complaint and I didn't report it.

[tamthebam]

16 hours ago, Mark Connolly said:

I thought "gender reveal parties" couldn't get more odd, then started seeing stuff like this

Have any P&Bers ever been to a party involving revealing of genitals....?