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Ways to spice up F1


scottsdad

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With new owners and a new audience thanks to Netflix, how can F1 reach ever more people?

1. Qualifying. Each race to have a different, local form of qualifying away from driving. The British Grand Prix qualifying order shall be determined by having the drivers take part in cheese rolling event. The Japanese Grand Prix  qualifying to be determined by a Sumo Wrestling event against real sumo wrestlers. And so on. 

2. Danger. In the 1960s there was an almost 50% chance of a driver being killed during a grand prix. Safety measures have reduced this number dramatically but the element of danger has been removed from the sport. To bring it back, a sniper will take pot-shots at the drivers on selected circuits, such as the Parabolica at Monza, the hairpin at Giles Villeneuve or Eau Rouge at Spa.

3. Tyres. Each race drivers must use at least two different types of tyre (soft, medium, hard). To enhance this, the choices of tyres will be expanded so that cars must use two of F1 tyres, pram tyres and tractor tyres. 

4. The Flintstones. One race per year shall be selected to run Flintstones-style. Cars will have engines and underfloors removed and shall be powered only by the drivers' feet. Imagine seeing Hamilton and Verstappen going wheel to wheel at speeds of up to 3 mph over 78 laps at Monaco. This would of course be trickier in hilly circuits such as Speilberg.

5. Safety Car. As we now know safety cars can bring out a lot of reaction from fans. As such, the safety car will be deployed once per race but only for Lewis Hamilton to follow. Other drivers may carry on racing unimpeded. Hamilton fans will surely keep F1 in the twittersphere seeing their man slowly drive behind the safety car. 

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A Monaco style rally round the streets of Edinburgh. Negotiate speed bumps, pot holes, private hire cars and Deliveroo cyclists. The bus lane and 20 mph cameras are not switched off and cars in the pits get ticketed by traffic wardens. 

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1. If you get lapped your car explodes. Nobody needs pointless backmarkers. 

2. Drivers can all talk to each other rather than just race engineers. Listening to Verstappen giving it the big GIRUYs to Hamilton as he passes him to win something is what the viewer really wants. 

3. Refuelling. The pits have just lost that air of danger.

4. The race director is selected at random from the crowd each race weekend. "I hev sent yoo and emayul" "f**k off Toto I'm getting another beer"

5. Hamilton is disqualified for some hilariously bullshit reason every other race. No further comment.

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2 hours ago, Cardinal Richelieu said:

Mario Kart style powerups. Bullets, star powers, bananas etc. And in particular blue shells to take out the leader (unless he has a mushroom). 

This French guy had the right idea. 

 

The final race of the season should always be on Rainbow Road

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Hamilton painting a tunnel on a wall and verstappen somehow driving through it leaving a furious Lewis Hamilton to shout at his sniggering dog before driving into it only for it to now be a wall and his car to crumple and uncrumple repeatedly to concertina sound effects

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1. Give all teams a budget of $3,000 and free access to a scrappie's

2. Draw cards to determine the grid

3. Bring back proper chicanes

4. Each team gets a joker to claim a win once a season

5. At least one race to be run in torrential rain and one in snow, ON SLICK TYRES

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