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11 hours ago, Raidernation said:

I work Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday next week, then I'm off until August 19th!

Try not to get shot before your holidays start...

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1 hour ago, Derry Alli said:

I was 18 years old and was going to ibiza so used sunbeds for a while before going. The women in the sunbed shop were absolutely gorgeous. I witnessed a man leave sheepishly, apologising profusely. I'd been going there a while so I asked Anya what he was saying sorry for. She explained she had to ask him to leave as he booked three fortnightly slots to have his arsehole waxed and this was his second visit. Something along the lines of she done the full lot first week as he was a new customer but she'll just refund him because she couldn't stand there and wax a man with a full stonk on moaning his face off.

What a glorious time to be alive.

And what happened when you got waxed?

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17 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said:

At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There's nothing like a freshly shorned scrotum. It's breathtaking, you should try it.

The last turkey on the plate

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2 hours ago, Derry Alli said:

I was 18 years old and was going to ibiza so used sunbeds for a while before going. The women in the sunbed shop were absolutely gorgeous. I witnessed a man leave sheepishly, apologising profusely. I'd been going there a while so I asked Anya what he was saying sorry for. She explained she had to ask him to leave as he booked three fortnightly slots to have his arsehole waxed and this was his second visit. Something along the lines of she done the full lot first week as he was a new customer but she'll just refund him because she couldn't stand there and wax a man with a full stonk on moaning his face off.

What a glorious time to be alive.

 Wax On Whacks Off

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26 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said:

At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There's nothing like a freshly shorned scrotum. It's breathtaking, you should try it.

That sounds like it would have been expensive...

 

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2 hours ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

It's not a pleasant experience in all honesty, but the first time is horrendous. I get upper body only a few times a year. The thought of that sort of pain in my nether regions is not a turn on. 

^^^ image.png.bf5218415f2464e88a66533b392ab859.png

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On 07/07/2023 at 06:32, 19QOS19 said:

Got that a few weeks back. Had no idea what she was saying but she was looking at me and I had my phone out so assume that's what it was. 

Years ago while getting fuel at a Tesco, my phone rang in my pocket and I took it out not to answer it but just to see who was calling. A woman came sprinting out of the shop shouting at me as if I was holding a live grenade.

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13 minutes ago, Zetterlund said:

Years ago while getting fuel at a Tesco, my phone rang in my pocket and I took it out not to answer it but just to see who was calling. A woman came sprinting out of the shop shouting at me as if I was holding a live grenade.

I had the same thing at Tesco in Stirling twenty years ago or so, so I take it the staff were drilled about the dangers of exploding mobiles? She was screaming at me about the sparks coming out of my phone (which, no). As I wasn't doing the filling up, I wasn't even near the pumps.

Re: body hair, I was in a queue behind a big bald guy a while back, and he twisted round to look back down the shop at one point. When he turned back, his t-shirt had shifted and he clearly had some seriously heavy duty Sasquatch back hair going on and had got the missus to shave down to the collar of his shirt, but no further.

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11 minutes ago, Nkomo-A-Gogo said:

I live right behind a petrol station and have often heard them over the tannoy telling people to put out ths cigarette while using the pumps. Eek 

Seems sensibly prudent.  However, my science guru tells me that a lit cigarette will not ignite petrol.  I haven't, as yet, tested the truth of the assertion.

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7 minutes ago, Thane of Cawdor said:

Seems sensibly prudent.  However, my science guru tells me that a lit cigarette will not ignite petrol.  I haven't, as yet, tested the truth of the assertion.

I can vaguely remember my father getting one of his mates around to help fix his car - one of those '60s Vauxhall Crestas with the big fins and the round grille, beast of a thing (late '70s/early '80s NZ). They take the plug out of cylinder one, Dad cranks the engine, Trevor takes a big drag on his cigarette and shoves it in the hole... BANG! "Yeah, one's alright, let's try two......" 

Never did notice if Trev was missing any fingers. 

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2 hours ago, Nkomo-A-Gogo said:

I live right behind a petrol station and have often heard them over the tannoy telling people to put out ths cigarette while using the pumps. Eek 

^^^ Trailer Park resident found.

 

 

Ilegal_Gas_Station.jpg

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