Dee Man Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Failure at every turn. Perhaps the funniest episode of a serious show I've ever seen. 'There's no 'E', John'. 'There are only two 'E's', John', 'There isn't an 'A', John'. At one point it takes him a properly agonising 10 seconds to choose a letter. In one of the many rounds he lost his word was 'GRANT', the only reason being that the letters came out something like 'XDEFGRANT'. His family must have sent him on a bus down to Countdown because they couldn't afford to stick him in a home. edit - The woman he was playing had a bit of a shocker as well after Oor John had already failed miserably. The nearest she got was 100 away from the correct number, although it was just a mistake. Then in the final numbers game Oor John was 7 or 8 away. I mean, what's the fucking point? Oh aye, I forgot about GRANT. When the letters came out you just knew that was what he was going to say. I genuinely don't think he'd ever seen the show in his life before. "Pick your numbers, John" "Two small ones, two middling ones and two big ones". Wot? And what was his opponents Whitehall patter at the numbers all about? And the guest's shite story with no punchline about cutting up a dress? What a bizarre episode. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1320Lichtie Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Craigkillie managed to get "seething" and "clitoris" when he was on Countdown. Seriously? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 c***s that fill in tender documents. Where it says 'List your qualifications' I don't fucking want to read 'I've been doing this for thirty years. Fucking arsehole. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Craigkillie managed to get "seething" and "clitoris" when he was on Countdown. I'd like the chance to suggest "clitoral" as in pertaining to the clitoris, so they'd have to get the big dictionary out and I might find out what it's for. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 The sport bible The lad bible 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Spending ages filling in an online job application page only for it to wipe the lot when you hit the 'Save for later' button. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbornbairn Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Idiots that slow to 30mph on the motorway because it's raining. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
banana Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Spending ages filling in an online job application page only for it to wipe the lot when you hit the 'Save for later' button. Don't worry, you'll get the chance to fill the same information again, again, on a 4 page form at the interview 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AberdeenBud Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Noel Fielding. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Noel Fielding. Who was bowling? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 After all these years, I still have no idea how 'the three seashells' work. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AberdeenBud Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Who was bowling? Holding. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Holding. The bowlers Willie, Amite? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invergowrie arab Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 My train ticket's three letter abbreviation for January says JNR. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hillonearth Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 My train ticket's three letter abbreviation for January says JNR. They use some weird ones right enough - they normally use FBY for February unlike the rest of the world's FEB. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invergowrie arab Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 They use some weird ones right enough - they normally use FBY for February unlike the rest of the world's FEB.Nationalise them now!!! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 The bowlers Willie, Amite? No, the batsman's willy. Keep this up and they'll rescind your invite to the traditional P&B Burns' Night Orgy. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nelsjfc Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 Hitting Ctrl + V instead of Ctrl + X and vis versa. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 (edited) Hitting Ctrl + V instead of Ctrl + X and vis versa.I generally hit CTRL+B and have to wait for my favourites menu to show up before I go back to what I was doing. So annoying. Edited January 17, 2015 by Miguel Sanchez 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stag317 Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 The "like us to win" competitions on Facebook where they ask for a simple answer to question. People go on to say "aww my children would live this" or "had such a hard time lately this would be brighten my day/week/year". They seem to think that this will give them a better chance........ fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccccckkkkkk right off - if a sound bar or food processor will brighten things up then you've not had a hard time - wankers. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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