Jump to content

Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...


Recommended Posts

53 minutes ago, Rowan said:

Wtf is biological bread?!

f**k knows but them ducks love it, sad thing is that I will see her sometime in the next week and she will be doing the exact same thing, but pushing morons into canals is frowned upon in these here parts

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I swear this is going to be the root cause of some massacre in a wetherspoons where someone snaps and wipes out a whole table of lassies drinking pink gin thinking they're in some American reality show!
That'll be me. It seems that 50% of women interviewed for tv or radio utilise the upward inflection. Irritating beyond belief. I try to avoid pubs that might have shrieking women; I would be whipping out the assault rifle before the foam had settled on my old-man pint.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 hours ago, stevieKTID said:

Feeding bread to ducks, you do realise that animals have been surviving and thriving way before you bought too much bread.

I regularly see a woman in Vondel park and she is always dumping loads of bread for the geese and ducks, today one of my dogs ran over to grab some of the bread as I walked over to move the dog on she turned and growled "get that dog away the bread is for the ducks" I was quite taken aback but decided to try and educate her, told her it contained no nutritional value, its basically junk food for them, it fills them up and stops them eating what they should eat, it also attracts rats and mice (its actually banned in some areas of Amsterdam for this very reason) she just stared blankly and replied "it's ok I'm a vegan and the bread is biological"....I did a Garry O'Connor face, then turned and two of my dogs are looking at me as if to say "leave it mate, you can't reason with crazy" 

:lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 hours ago, DA Baracus said:

I regularly see folk get food nicked out of their hands by gulls (admittedly it's quite amusing)

Five times it's happened to me and I can assure you that there's nothing amusing about it. 

It's almost inevitable that one day I'm going crack and go all Liam Neeson on these sh*tehawk f**kers, ending up in the nick for crushing one's skull in using a shopping bag with something heavy in it, making all the children cry. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

25 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said:

Five times it's happened to me and I can assure you that there's nothing amusing about it. 

It's almost inevitable that one day I'm going crack and go all Liam Neeson on these sh*tehawk f**kers, ending up in the nick for crushing one's skull in using a shopping bag with something heavy in it, making all the children cry. 

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/man-kills-seagull-after-stole-12950988

you wouldn't be the first.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

56 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

Pretty poor show from the guy tbf, letting it get as far as the vet alive. 

I guess you could stop the kids crying by raising your foot high and shouting "FINISH HIM!".  Everybody loves a bit of Mortal Kombat. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Five times it's happened to me and I can assure you that there's nothing amusing about it. 
It's almost inevitable that one day I'm going crack and go all Liam Neeson on these sh*tehawk f**kers, ending up in the nick for crushing one's skull in using a shopping bag with something heavy in it, making all the children cry. 
Blood eagling a shitehawk in the middle of the street would send a message to the others IMO. Get it done
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, G_Man1985 said:

Surely after the first time when you decide to eat food out in the open knowing gulls are in the area you would think maybe this isnt a good idea.
Happened to me once walking from over gate to Olympia and i was lucky I didn't break skin when it snatched my food.

Learnt my lesson. The town is their hood

I was having a meal on the hotel terrace in Jersey with my Mum and Dad, and a gull swooped and grabbed my Mum's entire steak before she had a bite. Me and my Dad laughed our heads off.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Stellaboz said:

The fact that Lionel Blair continues to walk around a free man whilst he's clearly guilty of some hideous, deviant crime of a sexual nature.

We all remember Mime Master General Lionel on Give us a Clue-

"The most highly skilled of all was Lionel Blair — but how the tears of frustration welled up in his eyes during their Italian tour at not being allowed the use of his mouth to finish off Two Gentlemen of Verona!".

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For the last two mornings there has been a radio reporter outside the Houses of Parliament. There's some protestor in the background, I don't know if he's pro or anti-Brexit, but he has this f*cking annoying foghorn of a voice. He sounds like one of those moonhowlers you get wandering about the streets shouting after downing several bottles of cheap cider.

Somebody should smash the cnut in the gob.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, G_Man1985 said:

Surely after the first time when you decide to eat food out in the open knowing gulls are in the area you would think maybe this isnt a good idea.
Happened to me once walking from over gate to Olympia and i was lucky I didn't break skin when it snatched my food.

Learnt my lesson. The town is their hood

cowboy-shaking-head.gif

 

You can play the victim-blaming card all you like, but I shall not let my hot food go cold all because I waited to find a place to eat it indoors, hunting around town for some form of shelter in which to cower.

I shall stand up for our human rights.  I shall stand up for principles.  I shall stand up in defiance.  I shall stand up and eat my food outside.  However, I shall not, and we shall not bow down to tyranny from the skies.  They may take our pies, but they'll never take our freedom.

Edited by Hedgecutter
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...