Mark Connolly Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Just now, Shandon Par said: I find my brain thinking in P&B isms. Par example, someone could be describing their petty gripe and I'm trying not to blurt out "PTTGOYN thread for this pish". I have been known to mutter terms like "seething" and "verge of tears" during meetings 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Just now, Mark Connolly said: I have been known to mutter terms like "seething" and "verge of tears" during meetings Or struggling not to reply to work emails with those phrases or simply ^^^rattled. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LondonHMFC Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 I unfortunately cannot look Gemma in the eye anymore without muttering "milky milky". 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamesP_81 Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 I unfortunately cannot look Gemma in the eye anymore without muttering "milky milky". Just be sure to have p&b at the ready for your defense when you get called in to a hearing in the not too distant future! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Mrs Shotgun was watching one of those shitey home renovation shows the other night when I happened to remark on how annoying the female presenter was. Me: "I mean, she's a wid but that's all she's got going for her." Mrs S: "She's a what?" Me: Crap And because I don't want to GTF, it was this one. 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Ted Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 People who sit like this...Are asking for a knee replacement in their 50s. Thigh to calf is well known to cause knee problems later on, if you keep it up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 (edited) 3 hours ago, Shotgun said: Mrs Shotgun was watching one of those shitey home renovation shows the other night when I happened to remark on how annoying the female presenter was. Me: "I mean, she's a wid but that's all she's got going for her." Mrs S: "She's a what?" Me: Crap And because I don't want to GTF, it was this one. Her presentation style is a bit wooden, my dear. That's what I meant, more sherry? Edited May 31, 2019 by welshbairn 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Getting a speeding fine. I thought it just as 10% +2 in Germany too but apparently not. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 1 hour ago, Stellaboz said: Getting a speeding fine. I thought it just as 10% +2 in Germany too but apparently not. Consider yourself lucky - 75 years ago you'd have been sent to the Eastern Front. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Getting a speeding fine. I thought it just as 10% +2 in Germany too but apparently not. Because the Germans have always been known for their leniency aye? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 1 hour ago, Stellaboz said: Getting a speeding fine. I thought it just as 10% +2 in Germany too but apparently not. +3 km/h apparently. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 10 hours ago, GordonD said: To be fair the toilets in some Wetherspoons pubs could do with a bloody lift. I know what you mean. To find them you have to go down the stairs, along the corridor, past the fir trees and the lamppost, only to be disturbed in mid pish by a White Witch and a dirty big lion... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 Salesmen, whether it be Car, Carpet, couch or Mattress. They’re all the same. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 13 minutes ago, mizfit said: Salesmen, whether it be Car, Carpet, couch or Mattress. They’re all the same. ^^^^^ Farmer whose daughter has been shagged by one 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
101 Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 1 hour ago, GordonD said: ^^^^^ Farmer whose daughter has been shagged by all four FTFY 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 Got a new car yesterday. Just locked the keys in it. Approx 7 miles from home. I could open the car with an app only I’ve not set the app up yet and for it to complete the registration you need to be in the car. Now I have the dilemma of waiting/paying for a taxi to bring me the spare or just punching out whichever window looks cheapest to replace. FFS. With my first car you could break into it in seconds with a coat hanger. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 Got a new car yesterday. Just locked the keys in it. Approx 7 miles from home. I could open the car with an app only I’ve not set the app up yet and for it to complete the registration you need to be in the car. Now I have the dilemma of waiting/paying for a taxi to bring me the spare or just punching out whichever window looks cheapest to replace. FFS. With my first car you could break into it in seconds with a coat hanger. Dont worry about Mrs Par il pop round and let her know whats happening 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 1 minute ago, Bairnardo said: 4 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: Got a new car yesterday. Just locked the keys in it. Approx 7 miles from home. I could open the car with an app only I’ve not set the app up yet and for it to complete the registration you need to be in the car. Now I have the dilemma of waiting/paying for a taxi to bring me the spare or just punching out whichever window looks cheapest to replace. FFS. With my first car you could break into it in seconds with a coat hanger. Dont worry about Mrs Par il pop round and let her know whats happening Cheers B, you’re a pal. She has put the key, £70 and a note of where to find me in a taxi now so coast is clear. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: Got a new car yesterday. Just locked the keys in it. Approx 7 miles from home. I could open the car with an app only I’ve not set the app up yet and for it to complete the registration you need to be in the car. Now I have the dilemma of waiting/paying for a taxi to bring me the spare or just punching out whichever window looks cheapest to replace. FFS. With my first car you could break into it in seconds with a coat hanger. Are you back on the sauce? Edited June 1, 2019 by Sergeant Wilson 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 Just now, Sergeant Wilson said: Are you back on the sauce? If he was back on the sauce he would have run home, thrown up, had 8 espressos and run back again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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