Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...

[tamthebam]

Twats at football who think they're the team manager and give advice to players throughout the game. I don't mean shouting the odd comment at a player along the lines of "shoot man". I mean the sort of twats who keep it up for 90 minutes. 

There was a guy called "Coach" at Linlithgow Rose for many years but he was quite entertaining. The guy I had to suffer hearing today was just a twat. 

[Sergeant Wilson]

33 minutes ago, ThatBoyRonaldo said:

6 hours ago, tamthebam said:

Twats at football who think they're the team manager and give advice to players throughout the game. I don't mean shouting the odd comment at a player along the lines of "shoot man". I mean the sort of twats who keep it up for 90 minutes. 
There was a guy called "Coach" at Linlithgow Rose for many years but he was quite entertaining. The guy I had to suffer hearing today was just a twat. 

Coach is sadly missed tbh - 

I don't know about that. There was usually a 20 yard gap round about him.

[Cosmic Joe]

4 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

I don't know about that. There was usually a 20 yard gap round about him.

His technical area?

[Hampden Diehard]

Are you getting your parka when the next family allowance is due?

That ended a long time ago. That's what the winter fuel allowance is used for now.

[Hampden Diehard]

Do they have buses in other countries? 
The Septics being confused you can just about understand because they're on the whole ignorant salad dodging knobends who go everywhere by car but there should be no excuse for the Spanish/Italians/Germans tourists. 
Scene this morning: 4 idiots of indeterminate country get on bus. Having established that it is going where they want (funnily enough I've been in Germany, Netherlands, Spain and managed to read a route map on the bus stop but maybe I'm a genius) they then spend five minutes fiddling about in handbags looking for change. Just f*ck off and take your holidays at home next year. 

Weegie b*****ds, most likely

[A96]

On 17/08/2019 at 10:43, Shandon Par said:

Mrs bought me some new shoes yesterday..

 

These wouldn't look out of place in the first few seconds of this GIF

images.usuAlsuspects.txt

Edited August 26, 2019 by A96
GIF not downloading

[GordonD]

3 hours ago, ThatBoyRonaldo said:

Coach is sadly missed tbh - I believe he is living in the north east somewhere and attending Highland league/north of Scotland league football now.

Has he been replaced by a train?

[Melanius Mullarkey]

11 hours ago, Cerberus said:

Pictures on the app aren’t displaying.

I get this little icon thing.



I hope this works cause I can’t see it.

Thats fucking disgusting.  Mods, ban this poster immediately , horrendous picture that even Prince Andrew would be ashamed of.

[Hedgecutter]

11 hours ago, Cerberus said:

Pictures on the app aren’t displaying.

I get this little icon thing.

I hope this works cause I can’t see it.

I see it (desktop version).

 

1 hour ago, A96 said:

These wouldn't look out of place in the first few seconds of this GIF

images.usuAlsuspects.txt 43 B · 4 downloads

I can't see A96's gif though, although posting a text file to show an image was always going to be an ambitious move.

Edited August 26, 2019 by Hedgecutter

[coprolite]

On 23/08/2019 at 13:31, ICTJohnboy said:

Grossly obese males and females who lean on their supermarket trollies as they shop, and talk in loud annoying Lancashire accents.

 

On 23/08/2019 at 19:06, Moomintroll said:

On 23/08/2019 at 13:31, ICTJohnboy said:

Grossly obese males and females who lean on their supermarket trollies as they shop, and talk in loud annoying Lancashire accents.

Same thing, with plastic Scouse accents.

 If they were to walk upright while filling their trollies with full fat coke and cheese slices they might burn some calories. 

If you are going to do something you should commit to it fully, so their dedication to slobbery should be applauded. 

[GordonD]

3 minutes ago, coprolite said:

 

 If they were to walk upright while filling their trollies with full fat coke and cheese slices they might burn some calories. 

If you are going to do something you should commit to it fully, so their dedication to slobbery should be applauded. 

 

[MONKMAN]

That’s complete out of order, posting a photo of Mrs Throbber.

[Hedgecutter]

Forced software updates for the sake of software updates just to keep programmers busy.

By this I clearly mean Windows 10 that has removed some great little quirks and replaced it all with a clunky pile of shite.

 

Eta:  what was the name of the Windows 7 photo viewer that had the auto-correct function?  It had a red icon (I think) and wasn't 'Windows Photo Viewer'.

Edited August 26, 2019 by Hedgecutter

[A96]

2 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

I see it (desktop version).

 

I can't see A96's gif though, although posting a text file to show an image was always going to be an ambitious move.

Ambitious ?  .... fvkkin clueless more like 

Any tips on what I should've done ?   Preferably how you would explain it to the village idiot

 

 

[bud1876]

Twats at football who think they're the team manager and give advice to players throughout the game. I don't mean shouting the odd comment at a player along the lines of "shoot man". I mean the sort of twats who keep it up for 90 minutes. 
There was a guy called "Coach" at Linlithgow Rose for many years but he was quite entertaining. The guy I had to suffer hearing today was just a twat. 

Similar to this.
Supporters who think they are experts on formations and playing styles.
Shut the f**k up ... you'd laugh if a team manager/coach came along and told you how to do your job.

[Jacksgranda]

On 16/08/2019 at 18:31, Torpar said:

Similar to Shandon Par's tale of card fraud, I received an email on Tuesday evening thanking me for my order on Skip the Dishes, some cheeky scamp had hacked my account and ordered some kebabs to an address in Quebec. Contacted Skip the Dishes who cancelled the order and said they would launch a fraud investigation, called my credit card company who cancelled the card, both places said to file a police report.

Filed one online with Toronto Police, haven't heard back yet, fair enough, Toronto is a huge city and a little fraud probably isn't top of their list of priorities, what with the rampant gun crime and 37 murders so far this year to deal with. 

Filed a report with the police department of Laval, Quebec on Wednesday morning, received an email at 11.30 am saying my report has been assigned to an officer, received a second email at 11.35 saying my report had been cancelled. The message basically said if Toronto police ask for our help themselves we will help them, otherwise we can't be arsed with this. If Laval was a big city I might understand but considering they have only had 8 murders this year it just seems lazy.

In short Quebec is petty and gets on my nerves

[Dee Man]

1 hour ago, bud1876 said:

Similar to this.
Supporters who think they are experts on formations and playing styles.
Shut the f**k up ... you'd laugh if a team manager/coach came along and told you how to do your job.

I think that would only be a fair comparison if the manager/coach telling you how to do your job had spent almost their entire life watching people doing your job with varying degrees of success. I reckon if that was the case they'd be entitled to an opinion on how to do your job. 

[welshbairn]

I got a barman's job after about 30 years of watching them from the other side. Piece of pish, but you can f**k your lattes and mojitos if it's busy. And you'll get a slice of lemon whatever fucking gin you buy.

Edited August 26, 2019 by welshbairn

[The_Kincardine]

6 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

I got a barman's job after about 30 years of watching them from the other side. Piece of pish, but you can f**k your lattes and mojitos if it's busy. And you'll get a slice of lemon whatever fucking gin you buy.

I'll have a quarter of lime in my Tanqueray 10 and Schweppes, please.

[Bairnardo]

Not that I often agree with Kincy but Lime is almost always the correct choice for gin and tonic.